|Issue #4Letter from the
Welcome to the fourth, let me say that again
whopping issue of The Looney Bin! Sorry its been a long time since our last issue,
life happened. I found very little time to do anything else but work and go to school.
School ended. I took my break from everything, and now I'm back! Hope you enjoy the latest
issue of The Looney Bin!!
SROTW (Supreme Ruler of the World)
Sylvester and the Case of
the Missing Ruby:
Written by Babs Bunny
Edited by Ron "Keeper" O'Dell (Babs' boyfriend)
Illustrated by Sylvester the Cat
"It was a dark and stormy night"...at least
that's what the weatherman told me this morning, but I don't believe it. It didn't rain
one drop last night! Then again, I think he was talking about Detroit at the time.
Anyway...the name's Cat. Sylvester D. Cat, private I...or eye, rather. The date, January
31st, 1997. The time, 11:01 am...make that 11:02. I was bored in my office, had nothing to
do but toss crumpled up pieces of paper into my wastebasket. Oops...that was my paycheck.
The past few weeks had been pretty slow for me; the best case I got was a case of
laryngitis. Make that the worse case I got; I had to lay in bed for a week.
Then, at precisely 11:03 am...make that
11:04, a rabbit-shaped silhouette came up to the door and knocked. "Come in!" I
hollered, to which a female voice answered "I can't! It's locked!" No wonder
business had been slow these past few weeks!
I walked up to the door, unlocked it,
and opened it. It was a bunny, a female bunny with pink fur and cute little purple bows
tied to the end of her ears. She was wearing a trench coat, much like the one I wear but
tan in color. Mine is yellow. When I saw her, my heart melted like a chocolate Santa--
particularly the large one I ate for breakfast earlier that morning. Got a stomach ache,
too; see if I ever do that again!...Ahem...
"What can I do for you,
"Bunny," she interrupted in a
sensuous voice, "Babs Bunny. And I need your help."
"Okay, but I want to be paid up
front and I don't do windows!" I demanded.
"No! Not that kind of help! I need
you to look for something that's missing!" she blurted. At that moment I felt my
cheeks blush like the color of red wine...not that I've had any recently, but that's what
color my cheeks were. "I'm sorry Miss...?"
"Bunny. Babs Bunny. Didn't we cover
this already?" she inquired.
you're missing I can find for you. By the way, the name's Cat. Sylvester D...."
"...Cat, Private Eye. Yes. I know.
It says that on your door."
Again my cheeks blushed like wine.
"What are you missing?"
"I'm looking for Ruby, been missing
for days. Here's a picture." It was a photo of a cat, with a bright red ruby on her
collar. "I tried to go to the police but they said that they had more important
matters--like playing pool is an important matter!--so I looked you up in the phone
"I'm in the phone book?" I
said in a surprised voice.
"Yes," she replied. She walked
up to the phone book on my desk and flipped to the yellow pages; then fumbled through till
she got to the section titled "Private Eyes". "Right there," she said
as she pointed to the entry that read "Sylvester D. Cat, Private Eye. I solve
"Well what do you know! That's me
in there!" She then gave me this look like I was an idiot or something. Once again
the cheeks blushed. "Don't worry. I'll find it for you. I just need $200 up front,
and the rest can be paid when I find your ruby."
"$200?" she cried, "But I
only have $100!" Shoot. I guess I'll have to pay off my bet with Bugs later. We bet
on the Super Bowl and he won! Note to myself, never bet on the Patriots.
"Oh, alright. I'll do it for $100.
But you have to pay me the rest when you get the money."
"I'll pay you the rest when you
find Ruby!" she declared as she handed me the money. Sigh...I can't resist a woman
who's so domineering. "So where can I get a hold of you, Miss...?"
"Bunny!" she exclaimed.
"How hard is that for you to remember?" She handed me something that looked like
a business card--a real pretty one, too. It was printed on pink paper with the words
printed in blue. "Here's my phone number and the address of where I work. I own the
night club downtown."
"This woman owns a night club and
can't pay me $200?" I thought to myself, then said "Fine. I'll be in
"I hope so." she sighed as she
walked out the door...
To be continued in next month's
issue of "The Looney Bin"! Stay tooned!
Tiny Toons: How I
spent my Summer Vacation - Part II
Courtesy of The Duck Formerly Known As Plucky
The Trip To Happy World Land Starts:
17.-19. Name three items on the top of the Pigs' car.
20.-21. When "Ole Bessie" is about to hit
100,000.00, 20) who pulls out the stage lights? 21)the cassette recorder with the
22.-25. Plucky's first diversion includes a lot of
signs, what are four of those signs?
The Water Fight:
26.-27. Name two items that Babs pulls out of the beach pail.
28.-31. Identify 4 items that Buster pulls out of the
32.-34. Besides the water gun, name three items that
fall out of the closet.
35. What is the name of the hotel behind Fowlmouth?
36.-39. Identify four of the volleyball players.
40.-42. As Johnny Pew's limo passes Shirley's stand,
name three of the stores that you see.
43.&44. How much does it cost to get 43) lemonade?
44) palms read at Shirley's stand?
That's it for now folks. I
apologize for the lack of answers to this quiz and the first part which was posted in a
previous issue of The Looney Bin! But, I promise you'll see it soon enough.
Top Nine Reasons Sylvester chases Tweety:
The top nine list from the home office in Acme Acres, 3rd
floor, apartment 5g.
9) The craving for mice has gone down these days.
8) Yellow is my favorite color
7) That annoying "I tawt I taw a putty tat" saying has
driven me crazy.
6) To prove to the birds are our friends alliance that birds are
not our friends.
5) I can finally prove to my son that I am the greatest Bird
catcher in the world.
4) Tweety makes an easy target
3) Catching Tweety will make me just as famous as the Star
Wars:Special Edition movie.
2) I think that a Kangaroo is a giant mouse.
And the number one reason Sylvester chases Tweety:
1. Tweety actually pays me to chase him. (I have to make a living
Poll Results In! Daffy Wins Favorite Looney
Here are the results of the poll that was in issue #3. 13 people
took the survey.
1. Favorite Looney Tunes character:
Daffy Duck: 46%
Sylvester, Foghorn, and Wile E.: 15 % each
Pepe LePew: 8%
2. Favorite line:
"Mwah! Goodnight everybody!": 38%
"Hellooooooo Nurse!": 31%
"Whats up, doc?": 23%
"Sufferin Succotash!": 8%
3. Favorite "pair":
Pinky and the Brain: 69%
Babs and Buster Bunny: 23%
Runt and Rita: 8%
4. Favorite Animaniacs character:
No preference: 8%
5. New star of Tiny Toons if Babs and Buster werent:
Plucky Duck: 77%
Hamton, Fifi: 8% each
Plucky and Shirley the Loon: 8%
6. Favorite "lead" character:
7. The one show wed like to keep if all had to be canceled
Looney Tunes, Tiny Toons: 15% each
Pinky and the Brain: 8%
8. Opinions for this poll:
"Im taking a poll????": 46%
"It was okay.": 38%
"Loved it.": 15%
Okay, thats it for this month! Remember
guys, we need member support!!! Send any comments, questions to: firstname.lastname@example.org
If you have a story, quiz
or drawing that youd like to see showcased in The Looney Bin!, please send it to me
If you dont have access to a scanner for
pictures and the such, let me know, and Ill let you know where to send it.
Quote of the Month:
Special Thanks To:
"Being good is not enough
when you dream of being great."
Babs, Sylvester, Me
and The Keeper
you next issue!