Issue #03

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Issue #4

Letter from the Editor:

Welcome to the fourth, let me say that again…the fourth whopping issue of The Looney Bin! Sorry it’s been a long time since our last issue, life happened. I found very little time to do anything else but work and go to school. School ended. I took my break from everything, and now I'm back! Hope you enjoy the latest issue of The Looney Bin!!

SROTW (Supreme Ruler of the World)

Sylvester and the Case of the Missing Ruby:
Part I

Written by Babs Bunny
Edited by Ron "Keeper" O'Dell (Babs' boyfriend)
Illustrated by Sylvester the Cat

"It was a dark and stormy night" least that's what the weatherman told me this morning, but I don't believe it. It didn't rain one drop last night! Then again, I think he was talking about Detroit at the time. Anyway...the name's Cat. Sylvester D. Cat, private I...or eye, rather. The date, January 31st, 1997. The time, 11:01 am...make that 11:02. I was bored in my office, had nothing to do but toss crumpled up pieces of paper into my wastebasket. Oops...that was my paycheck. The past few weeks had been pretty slow for me; the best case I got was a case of laryngitis. Make that the worse case I got; I had to lay in bed for a week.

Then, at precisely 11:03 am...make that 11:04, a rabbit-shaped silhouette came up to the door and knocked. "Come in!" I hollered, to which a female voice answered "I can't! It's locked!" No wonder business had been slow these past few weeks!

I walked up to the door, unlocked it, and opened it. It was a bunny, a female bunny with pink fur and cute little purple bows tied to the end of her ears. She was wearing a trench coat, much like the one I wear but tan in color. Mine is yellow. When I saw her, my heart melted like a chocolate Santa-- particularly the large one I ate for breakfast earlier that morning. Got a stomach ache, too; see if I ever do that again!...Ahem...

"What can I do for you, Miss...?"

"Bunny," she interrupted in a sensuous voice, "Babs Bunny. And I need your help."

"Okay, but I want to be paid up front and I don't do windows!" I demanded.

"No! Not that kind of help! I need you to look for something that's missing!" she blurted. At that moment I felt my cheeks blush like the color of red wine...not that I've had any recently, but that's what color my cheeks were. "I'm sorry Miss...?"

"Bunny. Babs Bunny. Didn't we cover this already?" she inquired.

"Oh...right...sorry. Whatever you're missing I can find for you. By the way, the name's Cat. Sylvester D...."

"...Cat, Private Eye. Yes. I know. It says that on your door."

Again my cheeks blushed like wine. "What are you missing?"

"I'm looking for Ruby, been missing for days. Here's a picture." It was a photo of a cat, with a bright red ruby on her collar. "I tried to go to the police but they said that they had more important matters--like playing pool is an important matter!--so I looked you up in the phone book."

"I'm in the phone book?" I said in a surprised voice.

"Yes," she replied. She walked up to the phone book on my desk and flipped to the yellow pages; then fumbled through till she got to the section titled "Private Eyes". "Right there," she said as she pointed to the entry that read "Sylvester D. Cat, Private Eye. I solve cases."

"Well what do you know! That's me in there!" She then gave me this look like I was an idiot or something. Once again the cheeks blushed. "Don't worry. I'll find it for you. I just need $200 up front, and the rest can be paid when I find your ruby."

"$200?" she cried, "But I only have $100!" Shoot. I guess I'll have to pay off my bet with Bugs later. We bet on the Super Bowl and he won! Note to myself, never bet on the Patriots.

"Oh, alright. I'll do it for $100. But you have to pay me the rest when you get the money."

"I'll pay you the rest when you find Ruby!" she declared as she handed me the money. Sigh...I can't resist a woman who's so domineering. "So where can I get a hold of you, Miss...?"

"Bunny!" she exclaimed. "How hard is that for you to remember?" She handed me something that looked like a business card--a real pretty one, too. It was printed on pink paper with the words printed in blue. "Here's my phone number and the address of where I work. I own the night club downtown."

"This woman owns a night club and can't pay me $200?" I thought to myself, then said "Fine. I'll be in touch."

"I hope so." she sighed as she walked out the door...

To be continued in next month's issue of "The Looney Bin"! Stay tooned!

Tiny Toons: How I spent my Summer Vacation - Part II
Courtesy of The Duck Formerly Known As Plucky

The Trip To Happy World Land Starts:

17.-19. Name three items on the top of the Pigs' car.

20.-21. When "Ole Bessie" is about to hit 100,000.00, 20) who pulls out the stage lights? 21)the cassette recorder with the microphone?

22.-25. Plucky's first diversion includes a lot of signs, what are four of those signs?

The Water Fight:

26.-27. Name two items that Babs pulls out of the beach pail.

28.-31. Identify 4 items that Buster pulls out of the refrigerator.

32.-34. Besides the water gun, name three items that fall out of the closet.

The Beach:

35. What is the name of the hotel behind Fowlmouth?

36.-39. Identify four of the volleyball players.

40.-42. As Johnny Pew's limo passes Shirley's stand, name three of the stores that you see.

43.&44. How much does it cost to get 43) lemonade? 44) palms read at Shirley's stand?

That's it for now folks. I apologize for the lack of answers to this quiz and the first part which was posted in a previous issue of The Looney Bin! But, I promise you'll see it soon enough.

The Top Nine Reasons Sylvester chases Tweety:

By Sylvester

The top nine list from the home office in Acme Acres, 3rd floor, apartment 5g.

9) The craving for mice has gone down these days.

8) Yellow is my favorite color

7) That annoying "I tawt I taw a putty tat" saying has driven me crazy.

6) To prove to the birds are our friends alliance that birds are not our friends.

5) I can finally prove to my son that I am the greatest Bird catcher in the world.

4) Tweety makes an easy target

3) Catching Tweety will make me just as famous as the Star Wars:Special Edition movie.

2) I think that a Kangaroo is a giant mouse.

And the number one reason Sylvester chases Tweety:

1. Tweety actually pays me to chase him. (I have to make a living somehow!=))

Poll Results In! Daffy Wins Favorite Looney Tunes Character!

Here are the results of the poll that was in issue #3. 13 people took the survey.

1. Favorite Looney Tunes character:

Daffy Duck: 46%

Sylvester, Foghorn, and Wile E.: 15 % each

Pepe LePew: 8%

2. Favorite line:

"Mwah! Goodnight everybody!": 38%

"Hellooooooo Nurse!": 31%

"What’s up, doc?": 23%

"Sufferin’ Succotash!": 8%

3. Favorite "pair":

Pinky and the Brain: 69%

Babs and Buster Bunny: 23%

Runt and Rita: 8%

4. Favorite Animaniacs character:

Pinky: 46%

Dot: 23%

Slappy: 15%

Rita: 8%

No preference: 8%

5. New star of Tiny Toons if Babs and Buster weren’t:

Plucky Duck: 77%

Hamton, Fifi: 8% each

Plucky and Shirley the Loon: 8%

6. Favorite "lead" character:

Yakko: 38%

Bugs: 31%

Buster: 23%

Brain: 8%

7. The one show we’d like to keep if all had to be canceled except one:

Animaniacs: 62%

Looney Tunes, Tiny Toons: 15% each

Pinky and the Brain: 8%

8. Opinions for this poll:

"I’m taking a poll????": 46%

"It was okay.": 38%

"Loved it.": 15%

Editor’s Note:
Okay, that’s it for this month! Remember guys, we need member support!!! Send any comments, questions to:

If you have a story, quiz or drawing that you’d like to see showcased in The Looney Bin!, please send it to me at:

If you don’t have access to a scanner for pictures and the such, let me know, and I’ll let you know where to send it.

Quote of the Month:
"Being good is not enough
when you dream of being great."

Special Thanks To:
Babs, Sylvester, Me
and The Keeper

See you next issue!


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