Here's the first of (hopefully) many articles I plan to write about my extensive "Disney Adventures" collection. It spans from approximately 1993 to around 2002, with a couple of gaps here and there, but still a lot of stuff worth talking about. Like this issue... This one comes from the era when I was still buying the magazine off the newsstand, as you can tell by the lack of a subscription sticker (I don't think my subscription began until later in 1994). These magazines are neat little time capsules of the month in which they were published, as they cover virtually every aspect of popular culture, not just Disney. Fifteen years later, what kid knows who Dean Cain is? (By the way, the Beagle Boy on the right looks to be a little too happy to be tied up.) Advertisement for the French Toast clothing line, which I'm pretty sure doesn't exist anymore. Judging by her profile, I believe this girl grew up to be Paris Hilton. "Marsupilami" fan art? I didn't think such a thing existed! Note the cyber slang in the lower left. 1994 was when the Internet was just beginning to be used by people other than MIT scientists. Hard to believe there was once a time when people didn't know what an emoticon was. What's really laughable is just how much of the stuff in DA Buzz is completely irrelevant today. We all know what happened to the Sega Channel, don't we? (Also, did those brimless baseball caps ever catch on? I never saw anyone wearing one.) Not only was "Bonkers" still on the air, it was still in syndication. Sigh... For the ultimate in pop culture irrelevance, we have Ticket. What I like about this section is that the editors always made it look like one big advertisement. I can't imagine anyone honestly getting enthusiastic over a movie where Luke Perry rides bulls for a living. Look how optimistic they are over Shaquille O'Neal's acting career. Keep in mind that Kazaam didn't come along until two years later. Also, I can verify that Inner Circle were not around for very la la la la long. Can you imagine what the casting call for My Girl 2 was like? "Well, we can't bring Macaulay Culkin back! Get that kid from The Last Action Hero! He's box office boffo, I tell ya!" (And what kind of name is Anna Chlumsky? As Tom Servo once said, "That's not a name, it's a bad Scrabble hand.") Even though Dean Cain was on the cover, the actual interview with him is only two pages long. There's a metaphor here, I'm sure. However, the superhero theme continues into the winners of the 1994 Disney Adventures Superhero Contest. What criteria did they use to select the winner? A random number generator? Games, Scorch, and Anya all seem like they'd be ten times cooler than Metamorphon. And this proves it. The real draw in this issue is the super-secret White House tour, which spans an amazing 12 pages (and was way too much for me to scan). It concludes with this letter to the DA readers, written by Bill Clinton himself. Nice headshot, by the way. Here's your guide to the 1994 Winter Olympics - oh wait, they happened in February. Never mind. Looks like Michelle Kwan's career was already taking off, but I'm more interested in the exploits of Lloyd Eisle and Isabelle Brasseur. Dear God, what's he doing to that poor woman? The White House festivities extend into the Comics Zone this month, as cartoonist Russ Cooper does a couple of one-page gags about Bill Clinton's cat Socks. For some reason, Socks jokes were everywhere in late '93/early '94 - I remember Nickelodeon Magazine loved them too. There's a Darkwing Duck comic in here too, but it's the second half of a two-parter and I don't have the February 1994 issue, so I'm completely lost. This wasn't the only comic appearance of Fluffy, though I'm pretty sure he never appeared on the show itself. Maybe if I'd read part one, this part would make more sense. Oh, and we never see how the Liquidator becomes de-clouded - the story ends with only Megavolt and Bushroot being captured, while Fluffy turns himself in because he's bored with being the king to a fleet of cats that don't listen to him. This was one of several of William Van Horn's Nervous Rex stories that was included in DA around this time. All I remember is that I thought Rex was a Disney property and wondered why I couldn't find his show on TV. I'll admit it - that bee scared the crap out of me when I was a kid. As you can see from the back cover, Aladdin was still profitable enough by 1994 that they could release a video game for the Super Nintendo, even though the movie came out two years prior. Of course, this was all a warm-up for The Return of Jafar, which came a few months later, and we all know what became of that.