Belch's
Brief Reviews (3-31-01)
DR. BELCH
Sat., Mar. 31, 2001 14:07:14
XMEN #10: "Shadowed Past"
Though this episode had some nice pathos, it was hampered by an
extremely convoluted plot setup and confused execution.
Rogue is plagued by nightmares of a robed woman running through
the woods and being followed by a shadowy floating man. On a stone
bridge over a raging river wolves attack kher and force her to drop
a bundle that is in her arms. Rogue soon realizes it's a memory
culled from a victim she touched--and the infant in the bundle was
Kurt.
It's soon realized that the mother was Mystique, and Xavier confronts
her with the news. She reacts badly. An attempt is made to gather
more information, including sending Wolverine to a castle (the location
is never really clear, but I presume it's Germany) located where
Mystique's memories indicate the incident occurred...but the place
was gutted, then blown up to hide the evidence. Kurt learns surprisingly
little about his mother, his past, or what Magneto was up to in
that lab.
The original story was very muddled in this telling, but aqui es:
Mystique, disguised as a normal woman, had relations with a German
nobleman years ago. She became pregnant, but her secret was learned
after the child was born deformed. She fled her lover's castle that
night and set the baby adrift in a basket, presumably to die. Gypsies
reined in the basket downriver and raised the strange infant themselves.
Kurt grew up, was a circus performer briefly, and later became a
man of God.
Here we don't see Kurt's father, it's hinted that Kurt was born
normal was was transformed into a mutant through some srange eugenic
experiment by Eric Magnus, and Mystique is forced to give Kurt up
rather than willingly doing so.
I'm still surprised Xavier hasn't pulled his kids out of that school,
knowing full well Mystique is in charge and working for Magneto.
POK JJ #343: "No Big Woop!"
If you thought the baby Marill in "For Cying Out Loud" was a pain
in the butt, get a load of this one.
Ash and company stumble across a Pokemon preschool located in the
woods. Quite literally, in Brock's case--something crawls down his
back, he freaks out, and goes toppling down a cliff face, right
into the feet of a beautiful young woman. I've heard of falling
for a dame, but....
Alicia raises baby Quagmire, which are called Woopers and look a
bit like a cross between a beaver and a kindergartner on "South
Park". She recieves news that her mother has broken her leg and
needs her, so she takes advantage of her new friends and asks them
to watch the school for her while she goes to visit mum.
Wooper are adorable but mischevious, much like puppies, so the moment
the kids turn their backs the little devils are into the food supply.
It's noted Wooper love the sound of the tambourine, but Misty's
playing hits some sour notes. It turns out Togepi has the right
rythm to keep the Wooper in line, and soon has them all marching
obediently to his beat. (I wonder what the Pokemopolisters will
make of that). Hey, Mr. Tambourine Togepi, play a song for me.
Meanwhile, Jessy and James and Meowth are in the woods experimenting
with mushrooms. For a second I thought Jessy was going to nosh on
some Pokemon peyote and go psychedelic, but no such luck. Jessy
still has Wobbafett the Useless Pokemon; it only does counterattacks
and doesn't know how to stay in its ball.
Alicia's favorite Wooper has slipped away, and Brock reacts by--turning
to a stone statue? Talk about scared stiff. Ash and Misty leave
Brock, a gibbering incoherent wreck of a man, to chase the little
monster all over the woods, even scaling a cliff at one point, and
are just about fed up with Woopers.
The Wooper runs into Team Rocket and eats up all the mushrooms they've
gathered for their soup...but Jessy can't bring herself to swat
such a cute little thing. She tries to capture it, but it resists
becasue it has an owner. Pikachu shows up, and the Rocketeers try
to bribe him into giving them the Wooper. Now notice that Jessy
and James didn't get aggressive until *after* Ash shows up and gets
snippy with them? Their behavior from that point on was strictly
in the defensive.
After a brief skirmish, Brock and Alicia ride up on her motorcycle
and take note of the situation. Alicia, stating that Wooper are
stronger than they look, has her pet demonstrate that fact by piledriving
Weezing and Arbok, then grabbing Arbok's tail and slinging him around.
It was so cute to watch--reminded me of that old Popeye cartoon
where Swee'pea eats the spinach and then whups Bluto's butt.
Team Rocket--who, again, was only looking for a bite to eat and
not even acting out that day--blasts off again, there's a quick
bit of moralizing about not judging books by their covers, and then,
it's on to Johto.
I think next week my two favorite Pokemon square off: Jigglypuff
vs. Snubull. Hot dang.
ZETA #7: "Hicksburg"
It seems Zeta isn't the only one searching for his past. Ro decides
to travel back home for the first time in about a decade and try
to get her birth records from her first foster family.
Inspired by an ad-bot advertising some cheesy flick with a pretty-boy
actor and by Ro saying that her foster sister would be impressed
by a guy like that, Zeta shows up as Mr. Hollywood. Naturally the
girl flips and wants Zeta to be Romeo to her Juliet in the tryouts
for the local theater.
Trouble is, you don't show up as a big-time actor in Hicksburg without
attracting the media--and the bad guys. Zeta's childlike reasoning
puts Ro at a major disadvantage--how to get the information on her
past before Bennett and his goon squad sniff them out.
o make matters worse, Ro's foster dad is the local sheriff, and
her foster sister's boyfriend is jealous of Zeta...to the point
that, after a scene holgram generator (what's wrong with cardboard
and paint, honestly? Must everything be so bloody high-tech?) malfunctions
and exposes Zeta's secret, the guy tries to cut Z to bits with an
electronic buzzsaw. When a pile of logs is cut loose by Mr. Trigger-Happy
and heads for the theater at the bottom of the hill, Zeta plays
hero again. Now judging from the number of times Zeta has risked
his metallic butt to save the ungrateful denizens of every city
he's in, you'd think by now Bennett would realize Zeta isn't some
killer monster and stop chasing him, but nooooooooo....
Ro never learns about her real father--but a holophoto her sister
had in her possession all these years reveals a long-lost brother.
This was a fair episode in that we at least get to see a bit more
on Ro and her past and that she didn't come mysteriously out of
a patch of seafoam as I'd originally suspected. As I've said before,
she does have too much of a sense of style, and her dental hygiene
is surprisingly good, for a common street rat.
Next week--the Zeta/Beyond crossover shows. This promises to be
interesting.
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