Super Stuffed Saturday? Egad--makes my favorite dia del semana sound like a bag of marshmallows? Since the cartoons are shown in twos, let's give it a cooler name: "Double Shot Day". [The Swinging Medallions' song "Double Shot of My Baby's Love" plays in the background.]

X-MEN: "The X-Impulse"/"Middleverse". They're already rerunning "Middleverse"? That was fast. It could be their way of saying keep an eye out for Forge in another episode. The boy may be a genius, and may have built a dimensional warp generator with the best resources 1978 had to offer--but the bitter irony would be that, after two decades in stir, he would be confounded by devices we take for granted in 2001. Watch Forge struggle to operate a TV remote, or microwave a burrito.

JCA: "The Jade Monkey"/"The Rock".
A good joke missed: Jackie threatening corporal punishment towards the monkey. As in spanking the--eh, never mind.

POK JJ: "Wired for Battle"
Ash and co. plod through the woods on their way to the Azaelea gym (I think, because I'm quite confounded with the innumerable detours at this point), unaware that they're being watched by Team Rocket. They've got another plan to nab Pikachu. It's utter brilliance! It's Machivellian! It's grand in scope! It's--
--a hole. Translation: James p***ed away every nickel in the budget, so no more fancy robots, tanks, guns, and other shiny toys for the Rocketeers until Christmas (2092). So back to basics.
Just then Charles Bronson shows up and demands a Pokemon battle. Rule numero uno: when psychotic strangers come up to you in the woods and ask you to whip out your Pokeballs, by all means oblige them, instead of running.
Well, the psychotic-looking man with the Scotch-and-Marlboros voice proceeds to go Bad Bad Leroy Brown on them, and when the smoke clears, the Rocketeers look like a jigsaw puzzle with a couple of pieces gone.
"Bronson" is a master sensei and Pokemon master who introduces himself to the kids after Pikachu nearly gets turned into stir-fry by his Scizor. In a surprising twist, it's *Brock* who drags *Misty* away after she screams right into the nice crazy-looking stranger's face and calls him a rude--well, I'm sure during the dub several words of the four-letter variety got cleaned up. Those two kids are made for each other. >8D
The venerable elder owns a dojo nearby and has been hiding out in the forest getting in private practice. His star student is a disenchanted Net-addicted loner who is disenchanted with Pokemon battling and the world in general, feeling more at ease and in control on the Web (a simultaneous self-realizing cringe from a good percentage of the viewing audience, and I go on). Shingu, who has a Scizor just like "Bronson", seems to be part Webstalker, as he has data on every Pokemon master from Pallet to Poughkeepsie--their skill level, which Pokemon they own/trade/ditch (DYN the Charizard icon that popped up?), and their breakfast cereal preference. Man, he's got Ash pegged personality-wise...uses basic techniques and elemental Pokemon, hot-headed, impetuous, sublimating his lusts for a certain hot-blooded redhead (okay, that wasn't in there, or if it was, Shingu knew better than to admit to it.)
Shingu insists battles are superfluous and that he can type a few numbers into the keyboard to determine the victor in a match (cf. the attitude of that kid from "The School of Hard Knocks", who never fought a battle that wasn't on a simulator). Ash disagrees and says that only by battling can you truly test a Pokemon's mettle.
Team Rocket overhears the talk of Shingu's website and wants a piece of it. They decide to download the info into their own system and, in 1.2 seconds, whip out their equipment--keyboards and cable, that is. Minds out of the toilet, por favor.
Jessy, poor born-to-poverty waif, is Web-illiterate! Hilarious. She likely thinks a laptop is a hairstyle (DYN she refers to it as a "flaptop"?) and data is what an Italian guy asks an italian girl to go on. "Um...what's a download?" (She might think it's a sexual term.)
Shingu learns his perfect Web-world is incomplete when he learns he has no information on Team Rocket in his databank. panicking, he asks, "Are they that important that I should have them in here?" "No, not really," Team Twerp mumbles in reply.
In battling (admirably) the Rocketeers with his Scizor(somehow it seems shameful that a Webgeek can smear them), Shingu learns a new respect for the physical side of battling. Then Ash takes him through the paces with Heracross (I wonder if Shigu's computer had data on that little buggie's odd "appetites"? >8D ), illustrating that all the fancy programs in the world can't accurately predict a Pokemon's spirit and drive. "Bronson" is overjoyed, as his most recalcitrant pupil has rediscovered his zest for watching two small animals brutalize each other in competitive sport.
As for Team Rocket, they're limping off again, most likely looking to log in some nice quiet battles in the nearest video arcade. If they can bum some quarters, that is.
This episode was followed by "Little Big Horn".

ZETA: "The Next Gen"
Bucky, that freaky genius kid from "Remote Control", is back, complete with Riddler haircut, his remote--and a surprising request. Seems Zeta is old school and he wants to play with a new toy, and he's willing to blackmail Z and Ro by holding their airplane tickets hostage until they invite him to come with. The kid may be an egghead, but he can't travel without an adult. As Z is anxious to travel,he is forced to consent.
The plot revolves around a second droid sent to kill a guy called "The Merchant of Death", and with a monicker like that, you can bet he's not a C.P.A. He's an arms dealer, and everyone on the island paradise Z, Ro, and Bucky are headed to are scared [bleep]less of him. Sure he's a monster, but Z is Robo-Boy Scout, and doesn't think the government has the right to play judge, jury, and executioner.
The robot sent to kill The Merchant is the same one Bucky has his eye on, and, to be honest, friends and neighbors, I nodded off during this one, because it was one of the dullest and most pointless episodes so far. Seems Zeta would know to cut his losses and not try to save some irredeemable reprobate who's going to get disemboweled by his clients anyway when his guns get destroyed and he can't make his deliveries.
Seems also that Bucky may be a recurring character--little Bennett?
Speaking of Bennett, if he were smart, he'd grab Ro, then convince Z to give himself up to keep her from ending up with her brains outside her skull. The old grab-the-dame-and-use-her-as-a-bargaining-chip gambit is an old one, but there's a reason for that: it's effective. It shouldn't be too hard to spot her--she never bothers to use a disguise when they travel in public! She should stick out like a sore middle finger.
This ep was followed by "The Accomplice" and a nap for me.

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