Long-Leggety Beasties

[LadyM]

In response to a challenge on another board, I present you with . . .

Long-Leggety Beasties

From ghoulies and ghosties and long-leggety beasties
And things that go bump in the night,
Good Lord, preserve us!
- traditional Scottish prayer


The night was cold (which was not unusual for late October) and dark (which was not unusual for any time of the year), and Booster Gold was sick of it. Sick of the cold, sick of the dark, sick of being dragged along and forced to endure Maxwell Lord's idea of "team bonding." Team bonding, ha. If that was all Max was after, why had he brought all those camcorders and things? Booster knew a publicity stunt when he saw one.

The clouds drifted over the full moon, obscuring it, and Booster muttered a popular 25th century curse as he stumbled over a hidden root. This was insane. No one, no one, went camping in October.

"Nonsense," Max had told them, with that irritatingly cheerful I'm-going-to-get-my-way-in-the-end-so-deal-with-it grin. "This is the best time of year to go because the campgrounds are uncrowded."

Right, Max. That's why, Booster thought, hunching his shoulders against a sudden gust of cold autumn air. Not because you'd have to be crazy to try it.

Initially Booster, in his ignorance, had greeted the idea with enthusiasm. Sure, it reeked of a cheap publicity stunt, but Booster certainly wasn't above arranging those himself and if Max wanted to use one to promote Justice League International, that was fine by him. Anyway, the idea of camping out under the pine trees and the stars appealed to Booster, who loved the natural world with the desperateness of one who knew it would be stifled out of existance in four centuries and utterly forgetten by five.

It was not something he dwelt on because, as he told Blue Beetle, that kind of thinking could drive you crazy. The future was in his past, and he was determined to enjoy every minute he had in spite of it. So he had tuned out the grumbles and complaints and protests that his teammates piled onto Max with ever crescendoing voices and had hurried off to buy a sleeping bag.

Unsure what else he would need, he had recruited Beetle to assist, but he really hadn't been much of a help. "I don't know, Booster. Mace? Bear traps? How about an electric generator and the microwave?" Beetle, it turned out, had never been camping either . . . and had no desire to start. "I'm a city boy, y'know? My idea of a good time is running through an open fire hydrant as the police chase me."

That didn't sound at all enjoyable to Booster, but he had tactfully let the matter slide and gone to see if any of the other Leaguers would help him. Black Canary had taken pity on him and given him some pointers right up to the point where Booster suggested a few ways he could thank her, whereupon she had slapped him. 20th century women certainly were strange.

~*~

To be continued and all that good stuff! :anime:

~LM~

[Panther]

Why do I have a bad feeling about this trip?

Very funny - as usual LadyM.

And how I wish I knew what people in the 25th century use as curses...

More please!

[LadyM]

~*~


At last the JLI's van--Beetle had pleaded with Max to let them use the shuttle or the Bug, but Max had refused, saying they had to travel like the "common man"--was crowned with a cartop carrier crammed so full of food, backpacks, sleeping bags and general camping paraphenilia that it bulged impressively and strained against its hinges. The interior of the van was just as crowded, since every member of the Justice League seemed to have at least one bag that they were unwilling to part with.

And then they were all in costume, which made it worse, what with the capes draped and tangling everywhere. Max had insisted. He wanted to record them at intervals, to show their public "how human you really are underneath your masks." Beetle had immediately asked if they could "take the stupid things off, then?" Max had not been amused. Booster, who had wisely designed his costume with comfort as well as style in mind, had been content to keep quiet.

As it turned out, they were too human to provide much useable footage anyway. They had barely left city limits when Guy Gardner made some rather inappropriate power constructs with his Green Lantern ring, causing all the male members of the League to stare at him in disgust and Black Canary, the sole female of the group, to start screaming 20th century words at him that Booster had never heard before. (Though he mentally filed them away for further research, of course.)

Then Dmitri (aka Rocket Red) asked, in his innocent way, "Where is the Batman being, comrades?" The others, having been on the team longer than the Russian, really hadn't expected him to show up, but that did nothing to increase their irritation at finding that the Bat had ONCE AGAIN managed to avoid a generally unpleasant situation that the rest of them had to deal with. Max assured them that Batman would show up once they arrived at the campsite, that he had made him PROMISE he would show up. No one believed him. You couldn't make the Bat promise anything.

"I should develop a Beetle-glare," Blue Beetle opined, and since the mood was already cutthroat, this led easily into a general round of derisive, sarcastic remarks regarding the Dark Knight. Guy Gardner made a series of ring contructs that vaguely resembled fun house reflections of Batman, and for once instead of shouting at him, everyone was thoroughly amused. Even Black Canary.

Eventually they lapsed into silence, growing exponentially more bored as the van hummed along the highway. Mister Miracle, Dmitri (aka Rocket Red), and Captain Atom solved the problem by napping, leaning with their cheeks smooshed against the tinted windows or their arms draped awkwardly over mountains of bags, depending on where they were seated. Black Canary didn't sleep, but merely stared out the window. Guy Gardner used his ring to create a magazine with content that was definitely not G-rated. J'onn, riding shotgun, was quietly munching on oreos. Max was muttering about how they should have taken the damn shuttle after all.

Blue Beetle and Booster Gold, who didn't take boredom so easily, tag-teamed their complaints about the heat, then the costumes, then Batman's absence (again), then the van ride ("Aren't we there YET?" Booster whined plaintively, unknowingly becoming part of a 20th century vacation tradition), and finally the seating arrangements.

"I don't want to sit next to Guy," Blue Beetle grumbled. ("Same to you, bug," the Green Lantern said, not looking up from his centerfold.)

"Rocket Red is crushing me," Booster complained from the back seat as he tried to push away the gently snoring Dmitri, who was leaning his head, which was helmeted to match his massive, hulking red and white power armor, on Booster's shoulder. "Why can't I sit next to Beetle?"

"Because that would not be in accordance with the seating chart," the Martian Manhunter said, lightly spraying cookie crumbs over the dashboard.

"Well, why do we have a seating chart?" Beetle demanded. "We're superheroes, not ten-year-olds!"

"I can assure you that when you start behaving as maturely as ten-year-olds, I shall no longer use seating charts," the Martian said, to which Blue Beetle sulkily crossed his arms and aimed wrathful looks at the back of J'onn's green, bald head. Booster gave the whole thing up as a lost cause. He unsuccessfully tried to push Dmitri away again, attempted to shift his rather long legs into a more comfortable position, and finally ended up leaning his elbows against the back of the first row of seats in a surreptitious attempt to catch a glimpse of Guy's magazine construct.

[Panther]

"Where is the Batman being, comrades?"

You know the Cold War is over when a line like that seems cute! >starts to wax nostalgic over the Cold days<

I can assure you that when you start behaving as maturely as ten-year-olds, I shall no longer use seating charts,"

ROTFL!!!!
:anime:

More please!