Canon in D: Epilogue *And a very impprtant announcement*

[SilentBob173]

Here it goes:

This will be my last story post. This is not some poorly concieved vacation like it was last time. This is my grand finale. Fact of the matter is, fanfics aren't really what I do. I just did this for fun. I wrote the stories I did, because I was sort of at a block with all my other projects. Now, all those unfinished works call my name. Whether I'm inspired or, not, there are projects left unfinished that predate 'I, Joker' by a long shot. I've got a screenplay to write, that hasn't even begun outline stage. This was a real fun ride, albeit a short and temporary one.

I might still be around in lurker mode for a while, but this is most certainly my last installment for anything. I had plans for other stories, I know, but it just doesn't play out like that now.

So, if there's anymore you want to know, please don't hesitate to ask. you can mail me at silentbob173@webtv.net, and you can find me on AOL IM at: FatHead173

I don't know if there's any other questions left unaswered. but feel free to ask.

Enjoy one last time.
Cheers.
Jason S

P.S.: By the way, its "Sigala". Kinda anti-climatic, huh?



"They say that these are not the best of times, but they're the only times I've ever known." - Billy Joel

--






He laughed for twenty minutes. For twenty minutes, his tortured giggles filled the night air. When it was all over, he was hunched over and on his knees. Tears of laughter streamed down his cheeks and into his mouth.

He heard footsteps approaching him from behind. The person who had captured him and reverted him to his true form. He had someone he ought to thank.

“How are you feeling?”

The voice was no longer distorted. The voice was now recognizable.

“You?!?”

She stepped into the light.

“Me, Puddin’!”

He stood up and stared her down for a moment.

“Fair enough.” He took a long deep breath of air. “Y’know, Harley, its good to be home.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m glad to be back at the old plant.”

“Yeah.”

“Around the ones I love.”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, and Harley?”

“Yeah?”

He grabbed her by the neck and pinned her to the wall.

“If you ever blindfold me and dip me in acid again, I’ll give you such a pinch!”

He let go and then turned around.

“Hurm. This whole dreadful experience has gotten my wheels a-turnin’, Harl.”

“’Bout what?”

“I’ve realized that my time upon this globe of chaos is sadly limited. I need to insure that there will be someone to look over my murderous empire once I’ve gone the way of New Kids on the Block.”

Harley sighed. “Oh, Donnie....”

“Quiet you.”

He slicked his hair back. “I’ve decided, Harley, that its time I had a son.”

She ran into his arms. “Oh, puddin’, that’s great! I’ve missed you while you were away. This’ll be a great way to celebrate. I’ll get the wine, the candles, some Barry White CDs...”

He pushed her off of him. “No, not that way, you horny harlot. I need to see results now!”

He sat in his chair and thought for a moment. He looked over at all the torturous devices Harley had used to drive him mad. An idea struck him.

“Harley... let’s go shopping.”

--


The moon was high within the Gothamite heavens . Joker was once again committing a crime. He climbed through a window in landed on the floor of the Gotham Applied Genetics laboratory.

He slinked over to a computer and typed in some commands.

After he typed in the search for what he was looking for, a list of experiments flashed before his eyes. As he scrolled through, something caught his attention.

“‘Twas a farmer had a dog...”

--


Batman was in the lab the next day. Gordon talked with him.

“It was him.”

“He’s back?”

Gordon handed him a small piece of paper. It was note:

‘You’d better be believe it. Be seeing you, Batsy. I have plans to call upon you later. Tah.

-J.’

--

Joker burst into the room where Harley sat thinking.

“I’ve got the perfect test subject, Harley! I can’t believe I never thought of this before! Oh, I can’t wait to see the look on his impossibly square face!”

He walked out.

“Oh, and another thing,” he poked back in, “Get packing, Now that Batsy knows I’m back, they’ll be here before the days out looking for me. I know where we can stay.”

--

He sat at his new desk writing and scribbling. He handed Harley a sheet of paper.

“These are your lines for when Batman comes in. You have three weeks to memorize them.”

She read to her self for a moment “’butratherthangoingthroughallthejoyofchildbirth... What does it all mean, puddin’?”

“It means, all the pieces are moving in for checkmate.”

--

Harley put on the coat and wig, like Joker told her to. She looked up overhead and saw what she had been looking for. He’s told her the kid was spotted coming this way, so she got ready. She saw two big burly guys walking opposite from her.

“Hey ugly!!! Your boyfriend’s walkin’ funny! Maybe youse two should take it easy on eachother tonight!!!”

The two men stopped and turned around. They were furious. As they advanced to teach this little nobody a lesson, she screamed at the top of her lungs.

“Help! Help! Somebody please help!!!”

Robin stopped and looked on at the commotion from atop a building. He pulled out his grappling gun.

“Hero time.”

Putting to use years of training under the Bat, he swung into the scene and within moments the two “thugs” were laid out on the floor.

He looked at his accomplishment.

“That evens things out a little.”

The woman chimed in behind him. “Not really, bird boy.”

He felt something hit him across the back of the head, and then he was out cold.

Harley spun a few seconds more, fighting off the momentum of the mallet that had taken out Robin.

Joker stepped out of the darkness, laughing to himself. He looked down at the unconscience avenger.

“A bird in the hand...”

He looked to the sky and saw the Batsignal grace the night sky.

“...make two in the bush.”

--
-JS

[Daughterof_Evil]

Wow. What a wonderful finale. I had an idea Harley was behind everything, but I really never thought you'd go that direction. Ultimately, a disturbing and humorous send-off, Mr. S. Your magnum opus. It was quite fun.

So, you didn't say you wouldn't come see us here again, did you? I know you're busy, but maybe someday in the far future, when all your other projects have been fully realized? You're so talented, and it's a shame that we won't see you directly for awhile. Maybe someday I'll see a movie you wrote, or a book you published. Good luck, man.

Bravo.

[SilverKnight]

>blinks< Wow. That...wow. That just...wow, man. Damn. Well, I'm truly sad that you're leaving us, Mr. S. but, with how excellent you're writing, I'm sure that whatever you plan to move onto will be a success. Just drop us a line every now and again, and we'll call it even.

[witness]

of course! who else but Harley would want the Joker back? You've done an amazing job with this story! tying in elements from ROTJ with this and turning it into one of the coolest joker stories i've seen on this board. i'm sorry it took me so long for the response to come! i know that whatever you set your mind to, it will work out. you're an amazing writer. i do hope that you'll come and visit the boards every now and then. until next time we meet!

[Trent Lane]

WOW, what a great story! this would make such a cool comic book story, definetly beter than most of the stuff that's out there now. good luck with your future work...

[Nightwing]

That's what I've been doing since the beginning, myself. I could picture every scene in animated or animated comic form. Well, except for the cursing but I'm sure SilentBob and Mr. Timm could work something out in production.

BUT, we all know how modest he is, so let's just give him out endless praises and let him go. He's bound for bigger things so let's just sit back and watch it happen. But hey, don't forget the little people, huh?