1. We are looking for a volunteer to help out with entering the DC and Marvel comics solicitations. If you are interested, please contact Harley.
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Just in time for Halloween, enter for a chance to win a $50 Gift Card from FUN.com! Details here.
    Dismiss Notice

Teen Titans Fan Fiction Teen Titans: Evaporation

Discussion in 'The Story Board' started by Crowgirl, Mar 26, 2005.

?

Which would you be most interested in?

Poll closed May 9, 2005.
  1. One of the Titans, under mysterious circumstances, lands in jail with a good chance of being there f

    58.8%
  2. To figure out the identities of thieves who keep robbing banks nightly, one of the six goes undercov

    41.2%
  1. rrarbecy

    rrarbecy I'm Back!

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2004
    Messages:
    2,918
    Likes Received:
    0
    I hope that doesn't mean what I think it means.

    I must admit that was a tad unexpected, BB vanishing like that right there. And now Raven's started evaporating, too. Wow. We're in for a ride in the next few chapters.
     
  2. Alpha Man

    Alpha Man Raven in a Bikini? Brilliant!

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2005
    Messages:
    1,307
    Likes Received:
    0
    If Raven gets evaporated, that means Trigon can come back, right? Uh oh.:sweat: Why must you leave us in such suspense?! Five days until Halloween! Eeeesh! Oi vey! Donde esta la Kloe?!:anime: :D :D :D
     
  3. Death58

    Death58 WFWC Vet.

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2005
    Messages:
    1,202
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm not at the WFWC for a couple of days, and look what happens. . .Unfortunately, I too saw the stuff about Trigon before I got to read the chapter 17(oh well). . .I still read it though, and quite enjoyed it. . .Okay, review for the current chapter; I liked it quite a bit, and it's sad to see BB go like that. . .but it was done in a really awesome way:evil:. Now Raven is all alone, and seemingly evaporating herself. With Daddy coming back to power, what is she going to do? This story, as a whole, is absolutely enthralling because I can never seem to guess correctly about what happens next. . .I absolutely can't wait for more.:anime:
     
    #263 Death58, Oct 25, 2005
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 25, 2005
  4. Faethie

    Faethie Rockstarrlette

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2005
    Messages:
    1,824
    Likes Received:
    0
    NO! WAY!

    NO WAY!

    NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    :eek: :D
    WoW! Awesome! Those two chapters were really stunning, Chloe!! ANd now we're getting some answers!! And we've seen Crow (Finally :D )

    U noe I'm extremely BB/Rae (tho BB should be MINE!MINE!!!!!) so I was happy about that....And of course Beast Boy went at the right moment, didn't he...NOT! U evil genious!!!

    And now Rae has started to evaporate too.....

    I can't wait for the next chapter!!!!!:eek: What will happen next, I wonder.....don don don!!

    If u havent noticed I'm on a sugar high....:sweat: :p
     
  5. ShadowOfAGhost

    ShadowOfAGhost Computer Geek

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2004
    Messages:
    1,546
    Likes Received:
    0
    -phew!- Finally up to date. I thought it would take longer than this, but it turns out you really can do anything you set your mind to (as long as you have a techno remix of the Umpa Lumpa song playing in the background :p [​IMG] )

    Okay, read the past chapters that I was missing. I'll keep it simple.



    1. Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn, this is a freakin' sweet story
    2. DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN!!! F***ING CLIFF HANGERS!!!
    well, now that that's out of the way, time for some details. this is the hard part becuase I read so much it's hard to keep track of it all and pick out the best stuff. very well written...god damn cliffies...funny stuff you got there...my favorite part in the past chapters was the end of the recent chapter, where BB evaporates. I'd say this is a great part because it is bittersweet and emotional, but it just makes you want to laugh at the same time because it's kinda ironic and seems to me like one of those "sucks to be you " sort of things. I dunno, It probably wasn't meant to be funny, but those Umpa Lumpas do strange things to your head. [​IMG]

    Keep up the great work!

    -Shadow :cool:

    umumumumpa lumpa doopadee doo I've got a perfect puzzle for you... [​IMG]
     
  6. Crowgirl

    Crowgirl Active Member

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2004
    Messages:
    2,884
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm busy looking an... item over, but yeah, I got all of this stuff... :shrug:

    First off, in Nevermore, BB and Cy go into Raven's head and meet Happy Raven first. Each Raven has a unique personality and trait they represent. The first Raven, Happy Raven, is always happy and likes pink. Each Raven basically symbolizes a different emotion (as all of us know) that the original Raven doesn't fully express in the world. They each symbolize a part of Raven she can't really express or else her powers get out of control. The real Raven has one side and one favorite color: BLUE!!!!!

    Ah, much better.

    How did you know she was going to do that in the next chapter? You are psychic I say! Psychic!

    You know, Anime, I'm going to reread all of your comments on this thread and count how many Nightmare/Nest references you've made, a'ight? ;) :p

    That sounds like something Katie would say, oi...

    Ciao,
    CG
     
  7. Matt A

    Matt A Smile. Or Else.

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2004
    Messages:
    5,596
    Likes Received:
    0
    The wisest words I've seen all day. I may just have to steal them for myself.:p

    Anyway, I think I need to offer my thoughts on the previous chapter. At long last, we have a more-or-less complete picture of what's been going on in this story, and to my eternal surprise the truth is actually rather simple...more to the point, it also makes a great deal of sense. When you have a mystery kept going for as long as this one was, it's all too easy to get the plot wrapped round itself like a metaphorical noose (believe me, I've seen this done before). You've managed to avoid that trap, whilst also avoiding the opposing trap of having the truth feel like an anti-climax. Kudos to you for managing that, and for setting up what will undoubtedly be a quality final confrontation.;) :anime:

    -Matt A-
     
  8. RavenofAzerath~

    RavenofAzerath~ military brat :b

    Joined:
    Feb 23, 2005
    Messages:
    862
    Likes Received:
    0
    ferumph..........i dont like the beast boy/raven thing.......


    phoey.......Angel and Beast Boy man!

    and if not...lets bring in Terra anyway......just not Raven....

    uh! *cough*

    anyway.....it was altogether an altigether explaining chapter....by what i could tell.....

    i still want to know what happens...but that's the point isnt it?

    yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh......
     
  9. Crowgirl

    Crowgirl Active Member

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2004
    Messages:
    2,884
    Likes Received:
    0
    The penultimate chapter y'all! Here it is!

    Now I have to warn you about a few things. One, the quote is unnaturally short. Two, this chapter is not my best. Three, the next chapter will be up either Sunday or Monday. :)

    Enjoy! Ish...

    -------------------------------
    God, I was certain, had completely abandoned me.

    -Avi, Crispin: The Cross of Lead

    Chapter 19- The End?



    Raven stumbled as she stared at her hands.

    No, no, no, NO!!!! This shouldn’t be happening! I need to find a way to stop this!! This cannot be the end!!! I… I’ve got to think of something!! No!!! This isn’t, can’t be the end! I’ve gone too far for such a loss right now! I’m not going to just stand aside and let Trigon win!! This shouldn’t be happening! The good guys always win!! Always! Why should this time be any different? Hmm?

    Think, Raven, think! There has to be something you can do! There has to be a way!!! Think!

    Just then, a loud rumbling voice filled Raven’s ears, and it terrified her.

    “Thank you, daughter,” Trigon’s horrible voice echoes against Raven’s ear drums, “As soon as you have joined your worthless friends on your own crucifix, I shall have gathered enough power to bring myself into this world and rule it as my own, with no mortal to block my way. I must thank you for being my portal to all of this, however. It seems that despite you deepest wishes, you have fulfilled your destiny after all.”

    My destiny, Raven thought hastily, I had completely forgotten about how I’m supposed to destroy the world. I may need to remember that next time this happens. If there is a next time, that is.

    “I won’t let you win!!!” Raven shouted to the empty space in front of her. Even though Trigon wasn’t there, she knew he could hear her cries.

    “Actually, child, you will. There nothing you can possibly do except give in so you can evaporate faster. What choice do you have? Do you really think you will be able to defeat me?”

    Maybe not, Raven mused, but if I’m the ‘missing link’ in all of this, then I must be where a lot of the power is coming from. That’s probably why I’m not just disappearing in a flash, but little by little, like Crow’s list said I would.

    That’s it! Crow’s papers! Maybe they have something in there that can help me!

    And without warning, Raven sprinted towards the door, flung it open, and raced up the all too familiar path to Crow’s room. When Raven had reached her destination, she nearly blasted down the door and dove underneath the bed. She yanked out the papers out from the space with a deadly fervor, causing some pages to fly everywhere.

    The pages Raven had grabbed were, light the others, a light blue. Fingering them without care, she discarded one if it didn’t seem worthwhile. Let’s see what we have here… Raven tossed pages away as she decided what was valuable or not.

    List in how you evaporate, I already know that! Erm… possibility chart? We already know who is causing it, so that’s pointless. List of heroes? Naw, what good is that? Isn’t there anything in here that can tell me what to do?

    Raven gasped as she caught a glimpse of what was left of her right hand. It had basically no fingers. Raven couldn’t really tell how she had been holding the papers all this time. Not wanting to see if there was a bloody mess at the end of the stumps, Raven saw that what was left of her hand was slowly decreasing.

    Raven dropped the pages and ran out of the room. Nothing in there was obviously going to help her solve this mystery. This can’t be the end! Raven shouted in her mind as she ran out of the room. It can’t!! I won’t let it!

    For no apparent reason (except perhaps not knowing where exactly she should go next), Raven ran down to the kitchen as fast as she could. Raven looked around wildly for something, anything, that could be away out of this.

    And she spotted a knife.

    Not thinking about what would happen after, Raven picked up the knife awith her left hand and held it to her throat. “What happens if I die, Trigon?” Raven laughed hollowly just to spite him. “You can’t use me then, can you?”

    “Foolish child!” Trigon roared, and Raven winced, the knife’s blade grazing her throat, “If you did destroy yourself, the power that you have would still be returned to be. Killing yourself would only make your life shorter, and less painful. So do it, child, I don’t mind.”

    Raven cursed loudly and threw the knife down on the counter top. She glanced at her evaporating arm. The elbow could have been considered the wrist because her arm was halfway gone. It was a scary thought and sight for Raven.

    “Yahhhh!!!!” Raven screamed, for she couldn’t think of anything better to do. I don’t know what to do!! Raven shouted inwardly. My friends and enemies are gone, and I’m about to go too!! Think Raven, think! There must be something Crow, or any of the others have done to try to stop this! Something of value! That could actually work! What was Crow’s advice? Think?

    Okay, um…. The only advice she clearly said was something about starting over, and then something ab-.

    Wait, that’s it!!

    Smirking at the mere thought of victory, Raven’s spirit was heightened. With a sudden burst of energy, Raven bolted up to the room which held all the machines and burst into the room.

    Standing there stupidly for a moment, Raven gathered her thoughts, remembering everything she had learned and what she had to do. Raven glanced and winced at the sight of her nearly evaporated arm, then she looked at the fingers on her left hand, which were slowly turning into nothingness.

    I’ve gotta work fast. It may be our only chance!

    Raven ran to the large TP plastered on the wall, and then pressed particular buttons in a certain order.

    “I may not be able to do anything now Trigon,” Raven said triumphantly after entering four digits on the TP and pressing a button equivalent to ‘enter’ on a keyboard, “But I will certainly be able to do something in the past, particularly on July 15!”

    "Foolish child? What false victory do y-?"

    But Raven didn't care about what he had to say, nor she she need to. Raven hit a large red button with the palm of her hand and the blank wall the TP showed began to change. For a few moments, Raven stared at the light blue mass of energy swirling around. After a few uneventful seconds, the energy swirled into a clear picture of a warm, sunny, summer’s day. There were six figures at a cheap looking plastic table, and each figure was looking at a pizza menu and chattering cheerfully (that is, except for a gothic girl who looked like she was experiencing total boredom).

    Raven smiled. Exactly was she was looking for.

    The telekinetic gothic woman ran back about ten steps, smiled wide and shouted, “I’ll see you in seven years Trigon!”

    Raven ran forward triumphantly, with one arm that had evaporated and one arm half gone, and leapt towards the picture of the Teen Titans.
     
    #269 Crowgirl, Oct 27, 2005
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 29, 2005
  10. JAG

    JAG Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2005
    Messages:
    3,046
    Likes Received:
    0
    "And so it ends..." -General Greivous

    Or does it? Maybe it's just me, but that seemed a little too easy. Why didn't the other heroes think of just going back in time?
     
  11. Liz-Slade

    Liz-Slade Year of the Cat

    Joined:
    May 25, 2005
    Messages:
    179
    Likes Received:
    0
    I knew that was what she would do! Only not that exact way. I would have freaked if I saw my are gone. What is up with the date July 15, 2005?
    That was a cool chapter I can't wait for this story to end but at the same time I want it to continue, but that just means that this was/is a good story.

    Liz
    Monkey, cute Monkey. Random I know, but if you were me you would understand.:D
     
  12. Death58

    Death58 WFWC Vet.

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2005
    Messages:
    1,202
    Likes Received:
    0
    Go back to the beginning? The day that Raven was sent into a coma perhaps. . .Also, this chapter was absolutely brilliant CG. Seriously, you wanted us to feel desperate, and lost, like all hope was gone. . .Seriously, you found a way to pace your writing, which is very difficult to do. I liked the chapter in general, and you also picked the perfect place for a cliff hanger. . .which makes me really want to read the next chapter. I can't believe it's almost over:crying:. . .*Sniff*I like mysteries. ..
     
  13. ShadowOfAGhost

    ShadowOfAGhost Computer Geek

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2004
    Messages:
    1,546
    Likes Received:
    0
    Okay a few things.

    First, true, this may not have been your best chapter so far, but it was pretty good. One of my problems with it was that it was far too predictable what would happen now, I'm probably no the only one that predicted that raven would be making use of the time portal in the near future after it was explained and introduced. but perhaps that is what you want us to think, that you intentionally letus think that. maybe you have a trump card up your sleeve waiing to surprise us with a massive twist. It's possible!

    also, I get the feeling you did not read overit after you finished and before you posted it. there were a few fairly obvious things that stood out that could have been fixed or strengthened easily, so that is my recomendation for this chapter. It's relativly new out, so you may have time yet to read over it and clean it up a bit. things like:
    are easy to change and make much better. personaly I think the use of parallell structure here kind of wekens it and makes it seem too redundant. another thing
    the first line here is tense and is hooking to the reader, but the line after cuts away at the tension you attainedd with the fist one. when you are trying to write to get the reader glued to the page, you want to avoid using exces words that just take up space. try this, take out "basicly" from the second line and re read it. It's much better. then try rewording it a bit, making it into a periodical sentence might help. (a periodical sentence is one that you have to read the period to get the full meaning of the sentence. for example: Non perodical: Joe bought flowers for sue, who was in the hospital with pnuemonia. Periodical sentence: Because Sue had been hospitalized with pneumonia, Joe bought flowers for her.) that's probably not the best example in the world, but ask your english teacher and he/she/it will be able to provide you with a better definition and a better example than I can.

    Good luck, Good work, see ya soon.

    -Shaodw :cool:
     
  14. Starfire5

    Starfire5 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2004
    Messages:
    444
    Likes Received:
    0
    Is that....the end?:sad:

    I hope not...cause if so it was kinda blunt and predictable but the writing was good!

    Mya

    P.S The people on this forum are INSANE, i mean people at my school say im insane but this is CRAZY!
     
  15. JAG

    JAG Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2005
    Messages:
    3,046
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yup. We're all lunatics. (Puts 'Insane in the Brain' by Cypress Hill on the radio):p
     
  16. ShadowOfAGhost

    ShadowOfAGhost Computer Geek

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2004
    Messages:
    1,546
    Likes Received:
    0
    and that's what makes it fun! :D as far as the end of the story...
    -Shadow :cool:
     
  17. Rae

    Rae Insert amusing comment

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2004
    Messages:
    1,665
    Likes Received:
    1
    Unfortunately, I had already guessed she was going to go back in time, but it was still fun watching (or reading) as Raven ran around having no clue

    The only crit. i have about the chapter was that it had a noticeable no of typos, but apart from that, tres bon!

    Rae
     
  18. Alpha Man

    Alpha Man Raven in a Bikini? Brilliant!

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2005
    Messages:
    1,307
    Likes Received:
    0
    That was a cool chapter, but I guessed she would go back in time somewhere around the third chapter. I chose not to say anything though, and I gather, that was a good decision on my part.;) It was either going to be where she went back in time or it was all a dream and she would wake up with Crow crying over her to get the chunk of Plasmus out.:sweat:

    I think Raven kinda panicked too much there, if that makes sense. She really didn't keep her cool, and it's weird that the Time Machine Idea didn't hit her until the last minute. It's weird that no one else saw this before. I mean, why didn't Cyborg, who's one of the smarter fellows, figure it out.:shrug: Other than that, the only thing I REALLY didn't like was the date of when she'd go back, that irritated the hell out of me reasons that perhaps only CG can understand. You didn't need to put the year; I mean, honestly, come on Kloe.:sad:

    Anyway, that leaves one final chapter... since you said it would be 20. But the 31st of October is a comin'! I eagerly anticipate the final chappy of the Kloe.:D
     
  19. Rae

    Rae Insert amusing comment

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2004
    Messages:
    1,665
    Likes Received:
    1
    I know it's not my story and all, but i thought i'd reply

    Cyborg couldn't go back in time because, although technically he could, he didn't know what the cause of the evaporation was, so there would be no point, and the same with the others. Crow could have gone back, if the time machine had been ready, but judging by the fact that she hadn't written it down, she probably didn't figure out Rae was the cause until just before she evaporated

    Just my thoughts...

    Rae
     
  20. Alpha Man

    Alpha Man Raven in a Bikini? Brilliant!

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2005
    Messages:
    1,307
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yeah, Crow could have gone back... but then this would have been a Crow fic with lots of action and cheering for the Kloe and the Claire (Whoa! Those sound alike! How bout dat!), but de autor said it was supposed to be a Raven fic.;) Basically, Crow could have gone back, but then she would have kicked ass too fast and this story would be over by Chapter 3.:eek:
     

Share This Page

  • Find Toonzone on Facebook

  • Toonzone News

  • Site Updates

    Upcoming Premieres

  • Toonzone Fan Sites


Tac Anti Spam from Surrey Forum