Okay, Dark Spider here with a great Fanfic. Its a Dragonball Z fanfic, so it requires SOME knowledge of the series to really appreciate it. Its a Seinfeld-esque fanfic in which there is no actually plot, but just some random everyday nonsense that involves the DBZ characters.
So without further ado, here is my fanfic...
(There alot of cosmetic stuff that needs to be done to the fanfic so bear with it until I get it done.)
Dragon Ball Z
A Long Average Day
By Dark Spider
(Goku sorts through his closet full of junk and he pulls out a stick)
Goku: Hey, what's this? Wow, its my Power Pole! I haven't used you in years.
(Goten goes over to Goku)
Goten: Hey dad, what are you doing? What's that in your hand?
Goku: This is my Power Pole!
Goten: A what pole?
Goku: My Power Pole. When I was young, I traveled around to many places and I encountered many bad guys. That's when I would use my Power Pole to get me out of danger. Of course, I don't need it much any more...since I'm the strongest person in the universe and everything.
Goten: What makes it powerful?
Goku: Watch this! POWER POLE EXTEND!
(The Power Pole extended to a great length)
Goku: POWER POLE RETRACT!
(The Power Pole retracted to its original length)
Goku: Great, huh.
Goten: That's it? I'm was expecting it to glow and get all powerful and stuff. I was expecting it to get all thundery and shock someone. I was expecting it to do something cool...but it just grows........wow. I'm gonna go outside and pretend I'm a birdie...that's much more fun then growing.
(Goten leaves disappointed)
Goku: ??? Well I thought it was cool... At least Chi Chi has some uses for it, she seems to sleep with it sometimes. Yea, that's it...Chi Chi will explain to Goten how the Power Pole is s cool.
Orange Star High School
(Gohan, Videl, Sharpener, and Erasa are all sitting together in a row in their English Class)
Videl: Hey Gohan, can you walk me home today?
Gohan: (nervously) Uhh, sure...I guess.
Sharpener: Gohan, you crack me up. Your a superhero...you save the city from crooks and what not and you still act like a nerd in front of girls...Gohan, you're truly pathetic.
Erasa: Hey, you leave Gohan alone Sharpener, he can't help it if he's shy. He makes it all up by being a cutie.
Sharpener: He looks like a shrimp to me. Even though he's the Great Saiyaman, he's still a wuss.
Videl: Shut up Lead Head, Gohan can easily kick you butt. Right Gohan...
Sharpener: I am getting tired of you two protecting that nerd, GOHAN, me and you, in a boxing match, this afternoon...got it!
Videl: Gohan accepts your challenge...he'll show you who's the wuss.
Gohan: (Thinking to himself) Oh no, what have I gotten myself into now...
Capsule Corp (Bulma's House)
(Bulma was sitting down reading a magazine and her mother came in)
Mrs. Briefs: Hello Bulma darling, have some cookies.
Bulma: Not right now mother, I'm busy reading.
Mrs. Briefs: Yea your right...your starting to get chubby.
Mrs. Briefs: Oh come on...men don't like chubby women. What would Vegeta say if you gained a few pounds.
Bulma: Mother please, Vegeta loves me for who I am. Besides, he's too busy training all the time to care if I gained a few pounds.
Mrs. Briefs: What is he training for anyway. He's already the strongest person around...oh I know, he's probably training for you. From the things I hear at night, you really put him to work.
Bulma: (embarrasingly) MOTHER!!!
Mrs. Briefs: And what ever happened to that Yamcha fellow you were dating several years ago?
Bulma: He's old news now. He's probably working on his baseball career.
Mrs. Briefs: I can't help wondering what your life would've been like if you've married Yamcha instead of Vegeta. You'd probably have that poor boy whupped to death, him and that cat thing he hangs out with.
Mrs. Briefs: Yea, what ever his name is...
Bulma: Mom, she's a girl.
Mrs. Briefs: It is? If you asked me, I say Yamcha is married to that thing. Its kind of weird that they hang out together all the time.
Mrs. Briefs: By the way, where is that super saiyan hunk you call husband.
Bulma: He's training with Trunks in the gravity room. Those two are impossible. But wait til he finds out that Goku and Chi Chi are coming over for dinner tonight. It'll be such a great suprise to him.
Mrs. Briefs: Oh boy, remember last time Goku and Vegeta got together? Those two are got straight to fighting.
Bulma: It'll be different this time. I'll make Vegeta an offer he can't refuse...
Dende's Lookout (The courtyard)[/center]
(Piccolo is out meditating and Dende & Mr. Popo are watching him)
Dende: Wow, Piccolo is so great isn't he Mr. Popo.
Mr. Popo: Yea, like my opinion matters...
Dende: Mr. Popo, what's the meaning of this...
Mr. Popo: I have been up here on this lookout for thousands of years guiding and helping out guardian after guardian. But they don't care about me. I'm tired of being a slave to your people. I'm out of here...
Dende: Huh? Popo, your opinion matters! I'm need you Popo.
Mr. Popo: Well lately I haven't been feeling the love around here. If anything, you have been parading around Piccolo for the past several years, denying me of any of my rights. Is it because of my race?
Dende: Your RACE?
Mr. Popo: You and Piccolo are both Nameks, but I'm not. What about me, what about my rights... I won't be denied my rights and privileges anymore.
Dende: If I have done ANYTHING to offend you, I'm sorry.
Mr. Popo: Sorry isn't good enough. I have been denied far too long to have a simple apology correct it. I want things to be done for me now.
Dende: Anything you want...
Mr. Popo: First I want benefits. I have been sick a couple of times, but I still have to provide for you now don't I. Second, I want an proper education. My only skills are to provide for you and via cooking, cleaning, and advice... I want to learn more than that...I want to learn how to read and write and do 'rithmetic. Third, I want to have some decision making power...I want to have some say so on how you run things around here.
Dende: Yes, I will do all of these things for you. You have been a great service to me and you shall be granted these things...and more...
(Piccolo has been listening to this conversation the whole time)
Piccolo: Why can't I help thinking that that whole conversation has happened before...in another time and place...
Yamcha's House (Most likely at Capsule Corp still)
(Yamcha and Puar are having a conversation on the couch)
Puar: Yamcha, what are you doing?
Yamcha: Well, my furry little friend, I have been thinking about my life and what I have accomplished.
Puar: Okay, well for most of your young life, you were a feared desert bandit.
Yamcha: Yea, that was a pretty good gig, but we left that profession to be with Bulma.
Puar: Yea, you have spent most of your life arguing with that woman. It was unbelievable how she yelled at you at every turn. I couldn't stand her sometimes. And then after all of that, she goes and marries the guy that was responsible for you death.
Yamcha: (angry) I know Puar, let's change the subject. I have been fighting for most of my life. But ever since I met Goku, I've had the burning desire to train even harder. I even trained under Master Roshi and Kami to gain an unimaginable amount of fighting spirit and training. But now, what good is it for.
Puar: Yea, you have been surpassed by everyone else and you are useless when you try to use your fighting talents for a good cause.
Yamcha: Yea, that's why I gave up fighting...because I can't compare with the great Super Saiyans...I'm tired of being a weakling, being useless when it came to helping my friends out.
Puar: But look on the bright side Yamcha, you're a great baseball player...and you are like the 12th strongest person on the planet.
(Yamcha looks at Puar)
Yamcha: Go away, my furry little friend, just go away.
Tien's house (Where ever that is)
(Tien sits at his Kitchen table...looking lonely)
Tien: (sigh) I'm feel so alone...
(Chiotzu enters and floats near Tien)
Chiotzu: What's wrong Tien?
Tien: You remember Lunch, my little buddy.
Chiotzu: Oh yea, she was the cute girl that would sneeze and turn into a different person. There was basically a good lunch and a bad lunch...
Tien: Yea, that's her. I can't help but think what my life would've been if I was to marry her.
(Chiotzu looks worried)
Chiotzu: Tien, listen to me, she was not the woman for you...forget about her.
Tien: But....I can't. I have been training all of my life, preoccupiying myself with it. But now that I have no reason to train regularly anymore, I have had more time to think about things, about life. I realized that I had a good person there in Lunch. I miss her. She may have done things that I don't agree with, but she was still a good person.
Chiotzu: Tien, forget about her, she's gone and she isn't coming back. I'm here for you now and always have been.
Tien: (shocked) Chiotzu...
Chiotzu: Listen Tien, we have been together, like brothers for years. We have been through alot. We have been assasins, training buddies, and defenders of the Earth. You don't need anybody else...just as long as we have each other.
Tien: You're right Chiotzu....we have been through alot together. I don't need anybody else, not Lunch, not anyone...just as long as we have each other.
(Tien and Chiotzu hug each other)
Chiotzu: Friends forever.
Tien: Okay little buddy...now that sounds way too gay for comfort...
The Kame House
(Master Roshi and Oolong watch aerobics on the TV. It features women in skimpy outfits jumping, dancing, exercising, and giving away A LOT of "fanservice")
Roshi: Oooh, BABY! Work it girls...heh heh heh
Oolong: You sir, are a dirty old man.
(Android 18 walks into the room)
18: You are an even dirtier pig.
Oolong: At least its natural for me...
18: (angrily) Just how many times am I gonna find you in my dresser!?
(Krillin walks into the room)
Krillin: What's wrong honey?
18: Why do you insist on keeping this pig here! He's really becoming a pain. If I even look at him one more time, I'll cook him right here.
Oolong: Okay, geez I know when I'm not welcomed...I'll leave.
Krillin: Oolong wait......Honey, don't you think that was a little harsh? What would Marron think?
18: Krillin, let me ask you something? Remember seven years ago when I was terrorizing the planet with my brother Android 17?
Krillin: Uh, yea...
18: Remember how my brother and me were beating up your pals and you were just standing in the background? Why do you think that was Krillin honey?
Krillin: (rather depressed) Because you were a lot stronger than me and I was afraid.
18: Okay, and let's add to that. I was stronger than you. Have you been training for the past several years?
18: I have an ever lasting power supply that gives me my strength. My energy doesn't deteriorate over time, but since you don't have an everlasting power supply and haven't been training for years, yours does. What does that mean Krillin, honey?
Krillin: That I have grown weaker in time and you are the same strength if not stronger... That you are now way more stronger than me than long ago.
18: It also means that I can severely kick you ass if I ever wanted to....do you want that honey?
Krillin: No honey...
18: Then the pig goes and he goes right now!
Krillin: Uh, Oolong, you have to go now.
Oolong: Wow, you are one whupped up kid. Are you sure I haven't been looking through YOUR underwear drawer instead of 18's?
Roshi: Heh heh heh heh
18: That's it pig, nobody makes fun of my husband and gets away with it!
Roshi: (whispers to Krillin) You should be the one saying this son.
Krillin: (embarrasingly) I know....but what can I say, except I love her....and besides, if I dump her, she might kill me.
Oolong: Uh oh, I didn't mean to say it....I was only kidding *laughs* See it was a joke!
(As Android 18 moves towards Oolong, the scene changes to the next one)
Orange Star High School's Boxing Ring
(Gohan and Sharpener were in boxing gear in a boxing ring. Videl, Erasa and other classmates were at ringside.)
NOTE: Anyone remember that nerdy kid from the tournament episodes that pointed Gohan out as the Great Saiyaman to Sharpener and Erasa? Well, I made him the referee in this match. Even though he wasn't given a name, I named him Lead (since it kept in the pun of Videl's classmates having names that had something to do with pencils. You know Pencil Sharpener, Eraser/Erasa, and Pencil Lead.
Sharpener: Alright Gohan, ready to get beat?
Gohan: *laughs nervously*
Erasa: I'm behind him all the way Gohan...do your best!
Videl: Sock him where it hurts Gohan!
Lead: Alright guys, I'm going to start the match now if you don't mind it or anything. We have Sharpener in the blue looking corner, and we have Gohan in the corner that looks like it might be red. If you guys are ready, I say we should start the match.
Sharpener: Just start the match already!
Lead: Uh, yes Mr. Sharpener sir. The match is begun.
(Sharpener starts moving around the ring while Gohan stands there)
Sharpener: What's wrong Gohan, afraid? You don't know what afraid is until I start pounding on you. Here I come!
(Sharpener runs up to Gohan and punches him in the head. Gohan doesn't even flinch from the hit and not only that, but Sharpener hurt himself.)
Sharpener: OW! What is your head made out of anyway, lead?
Lead: Oh no, I'm right here Mr. Sharpener sir. Gohan's head can't be made out of me.
Gohan: I better end this now before Sharpener hurts himself somemore hitting me.
(Gohan taps Sharpener with his boxing glove very lightly and it knocked Sharpener out)
Lead: Whoa, what's this, Mr. Sharpener's out for the count. I better start counting...uh, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5...
Gohan: Gee, I hope I didn't hurt him that bad?
Lead: ...6, 7, 8, 9, 10! Gohan you won the match! Yep, a winner is you, Gohan.
(Everyone gasps at this since Gohan only touched Sharpener with his glove)
Gohan: Wow, it must be the gloves...heh heh.
Lead: If they knock people down like that, then maybe I should get a pair...It might solve my bully problem.
Videl: Great job, Gohan. Let's go out for some Ice Cream Sodas.
Erasa: I'm game.
Gohan: O..kay, I guess... (wow, I can't believe they forgot I was the Great Saiyaman so fast...)
Bulma's Dining Room
(Bulma, Vegeta, Trunks, and Bulma's parents are at the table awaiting the arrival of Goku and his family)
Vegeta: I don't understand why I have to go through with this! I look horrendous in this attire.
Trunks: Yea mom.
Bulma: Quiet both of you. We are going to look nice for Chi Chi and Goku.
Vegeta: I will not look nice for anyone...ESPECIALLY Kakarot (Goku).
Trunks: Hey dad, why do you call Goten's father Karrot or whatever?
Vegeta: Its Kakarot, and that was his saiyan name before his Earth name of Goku was given to him.
(The doorbell rings)
Bulma: Pip down you two, they're here.
(Bulma goes to the door and answers it. Goku, Chi Chi, Gohan and Goten were all at the door.)
Goku: Hi Bulma. We're here!
Bulma: Goku, Chi Chi, Gohan, Goten...come on in!
(Everyone goes to the dining room where they meet Vegeta and company)
Vegeta: Well, Well, Well, if it isn't little old Kakarot and his two brats.
Bulma: VEGETA, behave yourself.
Trunks: Goten! Gohan!
Goten: Hey, Trunks! Hey Mom, can we go play with Trunks' toys?
Chi Chi: Not right now Goten, first we have to be polite and eat.
Goten: (sadly) awwww.
(A few minutes later, dinner was served. It was alot of food for a dinner party, but then again, look at who it was meant to feed)
Goku: Wow, look at all of this food and what great timing, I'm starving.
(Goku starts eating radically everyone looks at him)
Vegeta: (angrily) KAKAROT, what do you think you're doing? Your eating all of the egg rolls!
(With that said, Vegeta begins to eat radically too. Then Gohan, Goten and then Trunks began to eat like a rabid animal)
Bulma: Ugh, they all eat like pigs. Its tough trying to feed all of these saiyan pigs.
Chi Chi: You can say that again.
Gohan: Hey mom, are you going to eat your food?
Goten: No fair, Gohan! Its my turn to eat mom's food!
Chi Chi: None of you are going to eat my food. Shame on you two, where are your manners?
Goten: Gosh, sorry mom.
Gohan: Yea, sorry.
Trunks: (whispers) Hey Goten.
Goten: (whispers back) What is it Trunks?
Trunks: My dad really hates your dad Goten, and he'll do anything to beat him in something. Let's have some fun with them.
Goten: I don't know if that's such a good idea Trunks.
Trunks: Aw come on Goten, nothing bad will happen, I promise.
Goten: Well, alright, but remember you promised nothing bad will happen.
Trunks: Don't worry. Let's start.... (whispering to Vegeta) Hey dad!
Vegeta: (with a mouth full) What is it?
Trunks: Goten's father prides himself in eating real fast, he says he can even eat faster than you.
Bulma: Are you okay, Vegeta.
Vegeta: Is that so Kakarot? Do you really think you can eat faster than me?
Goku: (with a carrot in his mouth) Huh?
Vegeta: I challenge you to a food race. The loser can't train for a week.
Bulma: Vegeta! What are you saying?
Goku: A challenge huh? I accept your challenge, are you ready?
Vegeta: Ready when you are carrot top!
Trunks: This is getting interesting real fast Goten.
Goten: No its not! Your big headed fahter called my father Carrot Top. That is the ultimate insult!
Trunks: Hey, I'm not the one that said it. And my father doesn't have a big head!
(Meanwhile Goku and Vegeta start to eat rapidly)
Gohan: Wow mom, look at dad go. I haven't seen him eat like that since this morning. And Vegeta's really giving it his all.
Chi Chi: Gohan, don't praise your father. He's embarrasing me and the whole family by doing this.
Bulma: Embarrasing you? He's embarrasing me!
Chi Chi: Its your husband's fault. Honestly, Vegeta needs to stop this crazy obsession with trying to beat my Goku. Its making him crazy.
Bulma: Well, at least my Vegeta acts more grown up than your husband. He's still the same old child I met years ago in the woods.
(Meanwhile Trunks and Goten are still arguing)
Goten: ....you still cheated during out match at the World's Martial Arts Tournament. You said you wouldn't use your left arm and you wouldn't go Super Saiyan!
Trunks: That's it Goten, the only way we're gonna settle this is by fighting. You ready.
Goten: I'm ready when you are.
(Trunks and Goten start fighting next to the dining room table. Nobody except Gohan notices though, since Vegeta and Goku are still racing, and Bulma and Chi Chi are still arguing. Meanwhile, Mr. and Mrs. Briefs were at the table the whole time just watching everything)
Dr. Briefs: Wow, this is simply amazing. Every time Bulma and her family gets with Goku and his family, it always ends with a ruckus. Last time they were fighting over arm wrestling.
Mrs. Briefs: *laughs* Well, that's our daughter for you. She always manages to attact these kinds of people. At least Goku is kinda cute to look at.
(Mrs. Briefs watches Goku eating like a pig. After a few minutes, the phone rings. Mrs. Briefs answers it.)
Mrs. Briefs: Hello.
Roshi: Hello, is Bulma there?
Mrs. Briefs: Yes, but she's eating now. What can I do for you?
Roshi: That's too bad. I was gonna invite her and the family over to a midnight barbeque.
Mrs. Briefs: Oh good! What are you having?
Roshi: Well, we're having pig. Android 18 cooked and served it.
Mrs. Briefs: Wow, I didn't know she was so talented in cooking. Where did she get the pig from?
Roshi: Well, I guess you can say that Oolong provided the pig for the barbeque. Heh heh heh...
Mrs. Briefs: Great! I'll tell everyone. (To everyone) Hey Guys, There is a pig barbeque over at Master Roshi's house!
Goku: PIG! That's my favorite! I'm already there!
(Goku leaves the house and starts to fly off to Master Roshi's)
Vegeta: Oh no you don't Kakarot! Your not going to win this time, I'm going to beat you to that old man's house!
(Vegeta flies off after Goku)
Trunks: Hey Goten, lets go follow them.
(Trunks and Goten follow their fathers)
Gohan: *laughs* Its been a long day, and something tells me its gonna be a long night too.
(Gohan flies off after them)
(After you read it, please write a review for it...)