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  1. #1
    JohnCrichton's Avatar
    JohnCrichton is offline An astronaut!
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    12 Year Old 133t sp34k Translator

    Like This Thread!

    Hope you guys enjoy! This is a pretty funny toy to futz with...

    HOP3 U GUYS 3NJOY!11!! WTF LOL THIS IS A PRETY FUNY 2Y 2 FUTZ WITH.1!11!!!!1!11!!1

    http://ssshotaru.homestead.com/files...ranslator.html

  2. #2
    Chris Sanders MSX's Avatar
    Chris Sanders MSX is offline The MAN is back
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    This is cool, haha. Thanks John ! This should entertain me for a few hours.

    Translation: This Is Col Haha11!!1! Omg Wtf Thx O !111 Omg Thsis Hud Entertane Ma For A Few Hours111111 Lol

    -Chris Sanders... check the video, yo
    IF YOU LIKE POKEMON, YOU'LL LOVE THIS VIDEO
    FREE NERD RAP ALBUM
    AVAILABLE ON MY WEBSITE


  3. #3
    czyznyck99 is offline Banned
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    This is what I said.

    This is the dumbest thing in the world. At the very least it makes public education in grammar an absolute joke. The 26 letters of the alphabet are on the keyboard for a reason.
    This is what they said.

    THIS IS TEH DUMBST THNG IN DA WORLD1!1!1!1! OMG WTF LOL AT TEH VARY LEAST IT MAEKS PUBLIC 3DUCATION IN GRMMAR AN ABSOLUTA JOK31!!1!11! OMG DA 26 LETARS OF DA ALPHAEBT R ON TEH KEYBOARD FOR A R3ASON1!1! LOL
    I'm not laughing, ****face.

    Later.

  4. #4
    Catlover's Avatar
    Catlover is offline C'mon! Let's Dance, Baby!
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    I'm quoteing Artemis from the new Zoids seires thread.

    Hey man, don't be dissin' the chickens from Link to the Past. Don't tell me you didn't have fun picking them up, throwing them, then slashing their asses off. Good times.
    Now let's see it in 12 year old AOLer

    HEY MAN DONT B DISIN TEH CHIKANS FROM LINK 2 DA PAST11!1!!! OMG WTF DONT TEL MA U DIDNT HAEV FUN PIKNG TH3M UP THROWNG THEM TH3N SLASHNG THERE AS3S OF1!!! WTF LOL GOD TIEMS


    Now a little bit from a story I'm working on.

    Once upon a time long ago, in a place far a way, a cat girl was born. Her parents were the king & queen of a kingdom of cat people. They named her Katrina. One day a group of bandits raided the kingdom. In the carnage one of the bandits kidnapped Katrina and took her back to there hideout. There reason for taking her was that cat people’s strength is 10 times that of a normal human. They figured they could train her in their ways, and become the most powerful gang of bandits in the land. One day when she was still young the bandits decided to rob a bakery. During the robbery one of the bandits noticed that she was gone, when he went looking her, he found her devouring a stash of chocolate. After they got back to their hideout the leader of the bandits decided to name her Choco because of her love for chocolate. On the day of her 17th birthday she decided to go on a quest, her mission was to taste and find all the flavors of chocolate in the world.
    Now in AOLer.

    ONCE UPON A TIEM LONG AGO IN A PLAEC FAR A WAY A CAT GIRL WAS BORN!1!! OMG WTF LOL H3R PAERNTS W3R3 DA KNG & QUEN OF A KNGDOM OF CAT P3OPL3!11111 WTF THEY NMED HER KATRINA1!!11!! OMG LOL ONE DAY A GROUP OF BANDITS RADE3D DA KNGDOM!!!1!111 WTF IN DA CARNAEG ON3 OF TEH BANDITS KIDNAPAD KATRINA AND 2K HAR BAK 2 THEYRE HIEDOUT11!!1! OMG THEYRE RAASON FOR TAKNG HER WAS TAHT CAT P3OPLE’S STRANGTH IS 10 TIEMS TAHT OF A NORMAL HUMAN11!! OMG WTF TH3Y FIGURAD THEY CUD TRANE H3R IN THEYRE WAYS AND BCOME TEH MOST POW3RFUL GANG OF BANDITS IN DA LAND!!1!!! LOL ONA DAY WH3N SHE WAS STIL U TEH BANDITS DECIEDD 2 ROB A BAEKRY!111!! OMG WTF DURNG DA ROBARY ONA OF TEH BANDITS NOTIECD TAHT SH3 WAS GONE WH3N HA WENT LOKNG HER HE FOUND HAR DAVOURNG A STASH OF CHOCOLAET!!!111! OMG WTF AFT3R TH3Y GOT BAK 2 THERE HIEDOUT DA LEAEDR OF TEH BANDITS DECIEDD 2 NMA H3R CHOCO B/C OF HER LOV3 FOR CHOCOLAET11111 OMG WTF ON DA DAY OF HER 17TH BIRTHDAY SHE D3CIEDD 2 GO ON A QUEST H3R MISION WAS 2 TASTE AND FIND AL TEH FLAVORS OF CHOCOLAET IN TEH WORLD!1!!!1 OMG WTF LOL
    Current Avatar: Mikuru Asahina from "The melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya".
    R.I.P Un-cut Pretty Cure.

    Haruhisim.

  5. #5
    Chris Wood's Avatar
    Chris Wood is offline Desslar
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    People who write anything like that should be shot.

  6. #6
    Artemis's Avatar
    Artemis is offline For Great Justice!!
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    So, uh, should I be honored catlover chose a quote of mine to experiemnt with?

    Quote Originally Posted by Desslar
    People who write anything like that should be shot.
    Quote Originally Posted by l33t Desslar
    PAOPLA WHO WRIET ANYTHNG LIEK TAHT SHUD B SHOT!11!1
    This is going to be my next six hours of entertainment.
    "The advance is hip right now, but the original has a place in my heart, unlike pocket which only had the plastic grey, though color had killer appies for things like the sewing machine, not much use for virtual anymore, huh."

  7. #7
    Artemis's Avatar
    Artemis is offline For Great Justice!!
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    Another one! This is a snippet from Matt Wilson's comments on Shrek in the "Finding Nemo breaks box-office record" thread or whatever it was called in the WBC forum.

    It doesn't help that Shrek was itself a horrible movie. UGLY designs with bad (visual) acting that clash with the photorealistic backgrounds, the worst human character models I've seen in several years, a poorly-structured storyline that only exists to tell lots of (bad) jokes and show bare-bones references to fairy tale/Disney characters, and the most aggravatingly obnoxious character in animation history, voiced by the most aggravatingly obnoxious actor in motion picture history.
    Now if we aged Matt down to 12 years old and took away his brain...

    IT DOASNT H3LP TAHT SHRAK WAS ITSELF A HORIBLE MOVEI!111!1 OMG WTF UGLY D3SIGNS WIT BAD (VISUAL) ACTNG TAHT CLASH WIT DA PHO2RAALISTIC BAKGROUNDS DA WORST HUMAN CHARACTER MODALS IVE SEN IN SAV3RAL YAARS A PORLY-STRUCTURED S2RYLIEN TAHT ONLY EXISTS 2 T3L LOTS OF (BAD) JOK3S AND SHOW BAER-BONES RAF3RANCES 2 FAREY TAEL/DISNEY CHARACT3RS AND TEH MOST AGRAVATNGLY OBNOXIOUS CHARACTAR IN ANIMATION HIS2RY VOIECD BY TEH MOST AGRAVATNGLY OBNOXIOUS AC2R IN MOTION PICTURE HIS2RY

    111111 OMG WTF LOL
    "The advance is hip right now, but the original has a place in my heart, unlike pocket which only had the plastic grey, though color had killer appies for things like the sewing machine, not much use for virtual anymore, huh."

  8. #8
    Daniel P's Avatar
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    Eating popcorn seventy-four times a day will ensure that your red polka-dot guitars will be kept safe in a leisurely manner that can also be very pleasing to gophers, assuming that they have just danced around to the song "Stayin' Alive" and then shot a disco ball with a dart gun which then exploded into multiple pieces which were picked up by a toddler who glued the pieces together and made a deformed fish.

    TRANSLATION:
    AATNG POPCORN SEVANTY-FOUR TIEMS A DAY WIL ENSURA TAHT UR RED POLKA-DOT GUITARS WIL B KAPT SAEF IN A LEISURELY MAN3R TAHT CAN ALSO B V3RY PLAASNG 2 GOPH3RS ASUMNG TAHT THEY HAEV JUST DANCED AROUND 2 DA SONG STAYIN ALIEV AND THEN SHOT A DISCO BAL WIT A DART GUN WHICH THEN 3XPLODED IN2 MULTIPLE PEIC3S WHICH W3RE PIKED UP BY A 2DL3R WHO GLU3D TEH PEICES 2GATHER AND MAED A DEFORMED FISH!!!!1! OMG WTF LOL

  9. #9
    Zebi is offline Take off, eh!
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    Quote Originally Posted by JohnCrichton
    Hope you guys enjoy! This is a pretty funny toy to futz with...

    HOP3 U GUYS 3NJOY!11!! WTF LOL THIS IS A PRETY FUNY 2Y 2 FUTZ WITH.1!11!!!!1!11!!1

    http://ssshotaru.homestead.com/files...ranslator.html
    I had lots of fun with that thing. Now if only they had a translator that interpreted 133t speak into English so that I can understand some of the posts I've seen.
    Last edited by Zebi; 06-02-2003 at 05:12 PM.

  10. #10
    Catlover's Avatar
    Catlover is offline C'mon! Let's Dance, Baby!
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    So, uh, should I be honored catlover chose a quote of mine to experiemnt with?
    Yes, be honored that I quoted you mortal! Just kidding. Actullay it's a pretty funney quote, so I just grabed it.

    Here's one of the quotes in my signature.

    And what the hell is Ninja X Sidescroll TV? Or whatever the name of the show Jimmy Kustes keeps pimping.
    Now in AOLer.

    AND WTH IS NINJA X SIEDSCROL TV??!?!!! OMG WTF OR WUT DA NME OF TEH SHOW MAH KUSTES KEPS PIMPNG1!!1 LOL
    I'm going to find some more quotes.
    Current Avatar: Mikuru Asahina from "The melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya".
    R.I.P Un-cut Pretty Cure.

    Haruhisim.

  11. #11
    StarScream64's Avatar
    StarScream64 is offline Hero of Time
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    Ebonics in AOLer:

    H to the izzy! P to the shizzo!

    Translation:
    H 2 DA IZY!!!! OMG P 2 DA SHIZO!1!!! OMG WTF

  12. #12
    Ryoutarou's Avatar
    Ryoutarou is offline [Insert title]
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    I HAEV IMATURE FELNGS ABOUT MYS3LF AND WAT DA BD- SAYS DA 12 YEAR OLD.

    Haha very good laugh indeed hat's off to you Crichton.


  13. #13
    SNS's Avatar
    SNS
    SNS is offline "I am..."
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    Here's the controversial statement from a recent Disney article.

    If you think you're making a movie for everybody, you're making a movie for nobody.
    Here it is afterwords.

    IF U THINK UR MAKNG A MOVEI FOR AVERYBODY UR MAKNG A MOVEI FOR NOBODY1!!1!111 OMG WTF
    "I see no, feel no evil
    Black writing on the wall
    Unleach a million faces
    And one by one they fall"

  14. #14
    Daniel P's Avatar
    Daniel P is offline Member
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    Let's see what happends when we put already AOL language in:
    WOHA, D5DE THSI IS L1EK AWESUM DUEDD!1!111

    Translation:
    O D5DE THSI IS L13K AEWSUM DU3D1111!11111 OMG

  15. #15
    pabcool's Avatar
    pabcool is offline drink. more. smoothie.
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    Peter Grifin looks good in a bikini.

    Translation: PETER GRIFIN LOKS GOD IN A BIKINI!!11 OMG LOL
    WATCH PARANOIA AGENT

    ...please?

  16. #16
    pabcool's Avatar
    pabcool is offline drink. more. smoothie.
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    Annoying Rap/Hip Hop speak:

    Wut up, dawg? Hizzle my shizzle and hang with yo homiez!

    Translation: WUT UP DAWG?!??? OMG WTF LOL HIZLA MAH SHIZL3 AND HANG WIT YO HOMEIZ1!!!!!11 WTF LOL







    This is from Matt Wilson in the "Dude, Where's My Ranch" Simpsons Talkback.

    Quote Originally Posted by Matt Wilson
    Okay, more on why this was the worst episode ever:

    The writers show no competence in the subject matter or the general fundamentals of storytelling. The script was a rambling mess from start to finish, with conflicts that are established way too late into the story, and a piss-poor motivation of getting the Simpsons to go to this dude-ranch. Can't there be a more realistic way for them to just go there? Is it possible for the family to just take a normal vaction for once?

    The jokes show just how far behind the times the Simpsons writers are. Yes, Britney "did it again". But you know what? She also wrong a ton of other songs later on, that become even more popular. To make fun of "Oops!" is ****ing retarded. If this were 2000, then it would be funny. But it's not 2000. Some jokes didn't even make sense, like the cactus joke. The Shatner joke was a lame-ass derivation of the parodies Futurama actually put time and effort into. The beaver plot was a tacked on piece of drivel that was supposed to be the main climax of the night, but fizzled out way before it ended. The Lisa plot started way too late and ended way too early.

    Just open your eyes. Everything is wrong about this episode. I could say that one or two lines were funny, but you know what? Those two lines probably totalled up to 7 seconds. That's 7 seconds out of the entire 22 minutes that I would consider humorous. That's a .05%.

    So..

    GRADE: .05%/100%

    BOTTOM LINE: If anyone gives this episode higher than a D-, there is something VERY VERY wrong with them. End of story.
    And now, AOLified...

    Quote Originally Posted by 'Translation
    OKAY MOR3 ON Y THIS WAS TEH WORST EPISODE TEH WRIETRS SHOW NO COMP3T3NCA IN TEH SUBJACT MAT3R OR DA G3NERAL FUNDM3NTALS OF S2RYT3LNG!!!!111! OMG TEH SCRIPT WAS A RMBLNG MES FROM START 2 FINISH WIT CONFLICTS TAHT R ASTABLISHED WAY 2 LAET IN2 TEH S2RY AND A PIS-POR MOTIVATION OF GETNG DA SIMPSONS 2 GO 2 THIS DUDE-RANCH!!11!1 WTF CANT THEYRE B A MOR3 RAALISTIC WAY FOR TH3M 2 JUST GO THEYRE?!?????? OMG IS IT POSIBLE FOR DA FMILY 2 JUST TAEK A NORMAL VACTION FOR TEH?!?!??! OMG LOL JOKES SHOW JUST HOW FAR BHIND TEH TIEMS DA SIMPSONS WRIETRS AER!!11111 OMG WTF YES BRITNEY DID IT AGANE!!!1 OMG WTF BUT U KNOW WUT?!??!!?! OMG WTF SHE ALSO WRONG A 2N OF OTH3R SONGS L8R ON TAHT BCOME 3VAN MORE POPULAR111!!11 OMG WTF LOL 2 MAEK FUN OF OPS1111! LOL IS **NG R3TARD3D!!!!! LOL IF THIS WAR3 200 THAN IT WUD B FUNY1!111! OMG WTF BUT ITS NOT 200!11!1!1 OMG WTF SOME JOKAS DIDNT EVEN MAEK SENSE LIEK TEH CACTUS JOKE!1!!! OMG WTF LOL DA SHATN3R JOKA WAS A LM3-AS DERIVATION OF TEH PARODEIS FUTURMA ACTUALY PUT TIEM AND 3FORT IN21!11111! WTF DA BAEVR PLOT WAS A TAK3D ON PEIC3 OF DRIEVL TAHT WAS SUPOSED 2 B DA MANE CLIMAX OF DA NIGHT BUT FIZL3D OUT WAY BFOR3 IT 3NDED1!!11! OMG LOL TEH LISA PLOT STARTAD WAY 2 LAET AND ENDED WAY 2 EARLY

    JUST!!!1! WTF LOL OPEN UR 3YES!11!!1 WTF EVERYTHNG IS WRONG ABOUT THIS APISODA!!!!11! OMG I CUD SAY TAHT ONE OR TWO LIENS W3RA FUNY BUT U KNOW WUT?!!!?!? OMG THOS3 TWO LIENS PROBABLY 2TAL3D UP 2 7 SECONDS!11!1 WTF TAHTS 7 SACONDS OUT OF TEH ENTIER 2 MINUTES TAHT I WUD CONSIEDR HUMOROUS!!!1111! WTF TAHTS A 05%!11!11 LOL

    SO.

    GRAED!!!!!!1!1!1!!11! OMG 05%/10%

    BOTOM!1!1!111 WTF LOL LIEN IF ANYONE GIEVS THIS EPISODE HIGHER THAN A D- THEIR IS SOMATHNG VARY VERY WRONG WIT TH3M!!1!11! OMG END OF S2RY

    1!!!!!!! OMG LOL
    That was fun.
    ]
    Last edited by pabcool; 06-02-2003 at 09:02 PM.
    WATCH PARANOIA AGENT

    ...please?

  17. #17
    Elven Moon's Avatar
    Elven Moon is offline hiya, toonsters
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    Wut Sad Is Ive Sen This Bfore And It Anet Praty1!!1!!!1 Lol 3v3r Ben 2 Da Wb Oficial Hary Pot3r Mesaeg Board?????!! Wtf Lol Giev U Migraneas!!!1 Omg
    "You look like an ugly sister's... ugly sister's... ugly doll... thing" - Victor Volt, The Secret Show
    ° Cels of Sugar: Megan's Cel Gallery °
    ° Retro Shoujo °

  18. #18
    The Landstander's Avatar
    The Landstander is offline Thanks ants. Thants.
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    For something a bit longer, I took a random review from my site and put it in.

    Excellent episode, one of (if not the) best.

    Fenton was great (as always) in this one. I really don't think he went out of character in this episode (I always equate Fenton to this one kid I knew back in grade school; and he would be a brat to his mom at times and other times be a big-time mama's boy, so I think the two character types aren't that different). Brendon going gradually crazy because of Fenton was great, too (I love the dream sequence) and some of their conversations were quite good ("I'm the hero, and...you suck")

    It was good to see Melissa get a good plotline for once, and the FPC was probably the best part of the episode. The FPC video was pretty funny ("What the crap?") and so was the FPC lady (who I'm pretty sure was H. Jon Benjamin). Melissa's quick conversation in the mall with McGuirk was really good ("Coach are you drunk?" "Yea, that's why I came to the mall"). As for the ending...I'll get to that in a second.

    McGuirk's role in this episode was kept back, but every scene with him worked and was funny (Brendon eating his lunch at practice, the Mall Scene, the post-Escapo scene). Paula had a couple of good lines in this one. It was great to see Erik back and trying to get with Paula, and it was good to see Josie again in the background. Walter & Perry's scene with Fenton was good (and it doesn't prove they're not gay), and McGuirk's end Addleburg conversation was pretty good (Yes, the site has been taken ). Side characters worked well here.

    As for the matter of the ending...I've heard arguements that Melissa blowing up a building without any consequences was unrealistic. I guess I agree but on the other hand...I really don't care. At all. I mean the ending was so great in animation, so funny in Fenton freaking out at Brendon and gave Jason a nice role in the episode, so I really don't care if that part was unrealistic. I mean, who didn't want her to blow up the FPC at that point?

    Anyways, I think that's everything...definetely an A+.

    Positives: FPC, Fenton, side characters, the ending
    Negatives: The ending was a little unrealistic (though I don't care)
    3XCALANT APISODA ONE OF (IF NOT THE) BST!!11!! LOL

    FEN2N WAS GREAT (AS ALWAYS) IN THIS ONE1!!! OMG LOL I RILLY DONT THINK HE W3NT OUT OF CHARACT3R IN THIS 3PISOD3 (I ALWAYS AQUAET FEN2N 2 THIS ONA KID I NU BAK IN GRAED SKOOL AND H3 WUD B A BRAT 2 HIS MOM AT TIEMS AND OTH3R TIEMS B A BIG-TIEM MMAS BOY SO I THINK DA TWO CHARACTAR TYPES AERNT TAHT DIF3RENT)1!!! BRENDON GONG GRADUALY CRAZY B/C OF F3N2N WAS GR3AT 2 (I LOVE TEH DREM S3QUENCE) AND SOM3 OF THEYRE CONV3RSATIONS WERE QUIET GOD (IMM TEH HARO U!1111!11!!1!1111!! OMG WTF LOL SUK)

    IT WAS GOD 2 SE MELISA GET A GOD PLOTLIEN FOR ONC3 AND DA FPC WAS PROBABLY DA BST PART OF DA EPISODE!1!!1111 WTF LOL DA FPC VIEDO WAS PRETY FUNY WT CRAP)?!??!?! WTF LOL AND SO WAS TEH FPC LADY (WHO IMM PRATY SURA WAS H1!!1!1! OMG LOL JON BNJMIN)!!!!11! LOL M3LISAS QUIK CONVARSATION IN TEH MAL WIT MCGUIRK WAS RILLY GOD (COACH R U DRUNK??!??! WTF LOL YEA TAHTS Y I CM3 2 DA MAL)1!1! OMG LOL AS FOR DA ENDNG.IL!1!!!111!1!1!11 WTF LOL GET 2 TAHT IN A SECOND

    MCGUIRKS!1111 OMG ROLE IN THIS 3PISODE WAS KEPT BAK BUT EVARY SCEN3 WIT HIM WORK3D AND WAS FUNY (BR3NDON EATNG HIS LUNCH AT PRACTIEC DA MAL SCENE TEH POST-ASCAPO SCANE)!11!1! OMG WTF LOL PAULA HAD A COUPLA OF GOD LIENS IN THIS ON31!!1!11 OMG IT WAS GREAT 2 SE ERIK BAK AND TRYNG 2 G3T WIT PAULA AND IT WAS GOD 2 SE JOSEI AGANE IN TEH BAKGROUND!!11!1! OMG LOL WALTAR & PARYS SCENA WIT F3N2N WAS GOD (AND IT DOESNT PROVE THERE NOT GAY) AND MCGUIRKS AND ADLEBURG CONV3RSATION WAS PRATY GOD (Y3S TEH SIET HAS BEN TAEKN )1!11!11 WTF SIED CHARACTERS WORKAD WEL H3RA

    AS!!1! LOL FOR DA MAT3R OF DA ENDNG.IVE111!!!!1!11!1!11! OMG H3ARD ARGUEM3NTS TAHT M3LISA BLOWNG UP A BUILDNG WITHOUT ANY CONSEQUENCES WAS UNRAALISTIC!1!!!11! OMG LOL I GUES I AGRE BUT ON TEH OTHAR HAND.I!!1!111!!!!1!!!!1! OMG LOL RILLY DONT CAER1111 OMG WTF AT AL!!!! OMG LOL I MEAN DA 3NDNG WAS SO GRAAT IN ANIMATION SO FUNY IN FEN2N FR3AKNG OUT AT BRENDON AND GAEV JASON A NIEC ROLA IN DA EPISODA SO I RILLY DONT R IF TAHT PART WAS UNR3ALISTIC!!111! OMG I MEAN WHO DIDNT WANT HAR 2 BLOW UP TEH FPC AT TAHT POINT

    ANYWAYS?????!? WTF LOL I THINK TAHTS 3VERYTHNG.DEFIENT3LY1!!1!11!11!!1!1!1!1 AN A+

    POSITIEVS!1!!!!! LOL FPC FAN2N SIED CHARACTERS TEH ENDNG
    N3GATIEVS TEH ENDNG WAS A LITLE UNR3ALISTIC (THOUGH I DONT CAER)
    Wow...I don't think its possible to make it through the whole thing brain cells intact.
    ~_~

  19. #19
    pabcool's Avatar
    pabcool is offline drink. more. smoothie.
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    Here's the much-maligned article on Disney from a while back...

    Quote Originally Posted by Article
    Disney Marketeers to Focus on Cable Characters

    LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Movies are no longer the big picture for Walt Disney Co's consumer marketing machine. The small screen is the new deal.

    _

    Facing a crowded marketplace for animated movies, the Disney team that makes toys, clothes and other merchandise is looking to cable television for friends to join Mickey Mouse and Winnie the Pooh in the pantheon of profitable Disney characters, division president Andy Mooney said in an interview on Wednesday.


    At the same time, Disney is still closing retail stores. It plans to reduce the number to 405 outlets over the next few years from a peak of 741 in 2000. The trimmer retail operation will seek a modest goal of roughly breaking even, Mooney said.


    The money-losing outlets, which symbolized Disney clout a few years ago, will absorb most of the division's capital expenditures over the next few years as stores remodel, said Mooney.


    "It becomes an advertising medium for our theatrical releases. We still sell more tickets to the park than any travel agent in North America," Mooney said.


    "We've never predicted we will make a decent profit (at the stores). Retail is a scale game, and 400 stores worldwide does not scale make," he added.


    Disney Consumer Products, which brings in 10 percent of revenue at the theme park, movie and television entertainment conglomerate, made a splash with the debut of the stores in 1987. It profited handsomely over the next decade as Disney ruled the animated movie realm with spin-offs from movies such as "Aladdin," "Hercules" and its billion-dollar feature, "The Lion King."


    More recently, Disney has sought out retail alliances. The company must also contend with a change in the way kids bond with new characters, Mooney said.


    Specifically, movies do not sell a character as powerfully as cable television and Disney home videos, which children watch an average of 37 times, he said.


    "What has fundamentally changed from the days of 'The Lion King' is the growth of cable television for children," Mooney said. "Successful TV properties on cable television for children win out in the consumer's mind over first run intellectual property in the theater."


    By picking up "a billion dollars here, a billion dollars there," in revenue, as Mooney told investors at a Salomon Smith Barney conference, the consumer division can expect smooth growth, but it will not return quickly to the heady $893 million in operating profit it made in 1997, when Disney was animation king and before it began shutting stores.


    Last year, the division's profit fell 6 percent to $394 million from $401 million in fiscal 2001, as revenue dropped 6 percent to $2.44 billion from $2.59 billion.


    The Disney Channel, which reaches 81 million homes as part of basic cable, is now the main focus of development for the consumer unit. Disney is using its Lizzie McGuire (shudders) and Kim Possible series to reach young girls. Kim Possible merchandise heads to No. 1 retailer Wal-Mart Stores Inc. this fall.

    What, no merchandise for us young boys, and animation geeks?!? Little girls aren't the only carbon based lifeforms with cash, you know that, don't you?


    Boys will get a television series based on the animated blockbuster "Lilo and Stitch," which will rev up the market for product tie-ins.


    "That is a good example of a product that goes from theatrical success to DVD success, but really the big payoff in merchandising terms comes when it migrates to TV," Mooney said.


    He downplayed the importance on the bottom line of the Disney Stores. Disney has closed about 40 stores this year, taking the total near the goal of 503 for September, the end of fiscal 2003. Disney targets 405 in a few years, with a greater chance of closing more than expanding, Mooney said.


    The stores sell only about 5 percent of total Disney merchandise, although with a $300 million renovation plan in the works, they will account for much of the capital expenditures the division plans in the next four to five years, Mooney said.


    That will keep capital expenditures at recent levels of about $70 million, up from a recent low of $58 million in 2002, he said.

    "Successful TV properties on cable television for children win out in the consumer's mind over first run intellectual property in the theater."
    And AOLified...

    Quote Originally Posted by Translation
    DISNAY MARK3TERS 2 FOCUS ON CABL3 CHARACTARS

    LOS ANG3LES (R3UTARS) - MOVEIS R NO LONGER DA BIG PICTUR3 FOR WALT DISNEY COS CONSUMER MARK3TNG MACHIEN!!1!!!1 OMG TEH SMAL SCREN IS TEH NU D3AL!!11 OMG WTF

    _

    FACNG A CROWDAD MARKETPLAEC FOR ANIMAETD MOVEIS DA DISNAY TAM TAHT MAEKS 2YS CLOTHES AND OTHAR MERCHANDIES IS LOKNG 2 CABLE TELEVISION FOR FREINDS 2 JOIN MIK3Y MOUSA AND WINEI DA O IN DA PANTHEON OF PROFITABLA DISNEY CHARACT3RS DIVISION PRASIEDNT ANDY MONAY SADE IN AN INTERVEIW ON W3DN3SDAY!111 OMG WTF


    AT DA SM3 TIEM DISN3Y IS STIL CLOSNG R3TALE S2RES!!!1! OMG WTF IT PLANS 2 RADUCE DA NUMBR 2 405 OUTLETS OVER DA NAXT FEW YEARS FROM A PEAK OF 741 IN 200!!!1!!!1 LOL DA TRIMAR RETALE OPERATION WIL SEK A MODEST GOAL OF ROUGHLY BRAAKNG AVAN MONEY SADE11!!1!1 OMG TEH MONEY-LOSNG OUTLETS WHICH SYMBOLIEZD DISN3Y CLOUT A F3W YAARS AGO WIL ABSORB MOST OF DA DIVISIONS CAPITAL EXPANDITUR3S OVER TEH NEXT FEW YEARS AS S2RAS REMOD3L SADE MONEY1!!1 OMG WTF


    IT BCOMES AN ADV3RTISNG MADIUM FOR OUR THEATRICAL REL3AESS1!1!!1!! WTF LOL WE STIL SEL MOR3 TIK3TS 2 DA PARK THAN ANY TRAEVL AEGNT IN NORTH M3RICA MON3Y SADE11111! LOL


    WEV3 NAV3R PRADICTED W3 WIL MAEK A DACANT PROFIT (AT DA S2R3S)!!1!111 WTF R3TALE IS A SCAEL GME AND 40 S2RES WORLDWIED DO3S NOT SCAEL MAEK HE ADED1!1!! LOL


    DISNAY CONSUM3R PRODUCTS WHICH BRNGS IN 10 P3RCENT OF REVANUA AT DA TH3ME PARK MOVEI AND T3LAVISION 3NT3RTANEM3NT CONGLOM3RAET MAED A SPLASH WIT DA DABUT OF DA S2R3S IN 1987!11!!!1! OMG LOL IT PROFIETD HANDSOMELY OVER DA N3XT DACAED AS DISN3Y RULAD DA ANIMAETD MOVEI R3ALM WIT SPIN-OFS FROM MOVEIS SUCH AS ALADIN HARCULAS AND ITS BILION-DOLAR F3ATURA DA LION KNG1!11!1 OMG WTF LOL


    MORE R3C3NTLY DISNEY HAS SOUGHT OUT RETALE ALIANC3S!!1!! OMG WTF TEH COMPANY MUST ALSO CONTEND WIT A CHANG3 IN TEH WAY KIDS BOND WIT NU CHARACT3RS MONAY SADE1!!1! OMG WTF


    SPECIFICALY MOVEIS DO NOT SEL A CHARACTER AS POWERFULY AS CABLA TELEVISION AND DISN3Y HOME VIEDOS WHICH CHILDREN WATCH AN AEVRAEG OF 37 TIEMS H3 SADE1!11 WUT HAS FUNDMENTALY CHANGED FROM TEH DAYS OF DA LION KNG IS TEH GROWTH OF CABLE T3LEVISION FOR CHILDRAN MON3Y SADE!1!!1! WTF SUCESFUL TV PROP3RTEIS ON CABLE TELEVISION FOR CHILDREN WIN OUT IN TEH CONSUM3RS MIND OVER FIRST RUN INTAL3CTUAL PROPERTY IN TEH TH38R1!!!!111 OMG WTF


    BY PIKNG UP A BILION DOLARS HAR3 A BILION DOLARS THEIR IN REV3NUA AS MON3Y 2LD INV3S2RS AT A SALOMON SMITH BARN3Y CONFARANCE TEH CONSUMER DIVISION CAN 3XPACT SMOTH GROWTH BUT IT WIL NOT RETURN QUIKLY 2 DA HEADY $893 MILION IN OPARATNG PROFIT IT MAED IN 197 WHEN DISN3Y WAS ANIMATION KNG AND BFORA IT BGAN SHUTNG S2R3S1!!111 OMG WTF LOL


    LAST Y3AR DA DIVISIONS PROFIT F3L 6 PERCENT 2 $394 MILION FROM $401 MILION IN FISCAL 201 AS R3V3NU3 DROPED 6 PERCENT 2 $241111!!! WTF LOL BILION FROM $259!!!1!11 OMG WTF LOL BILION!!!!!! OMG TEH DISNEY CHANEL WHICH R3ACHES 81 MILION HOMES AS PART OF BASIC CABLE IS NOW DA MANE FOCUS OF DAVALOPMENT FOR TEH CONSUMAR UNIT111111 LOL DISN3Y IS USNG ITS LIZEI MCGUIER (SHUDERS) AND KIM POSIBLA SAREIS 2 REACH U GIRLS!!1!!! KIM POSIBLE MARCHANDIES H3ADS 2 NO!!!! WTF LOL 1 RETALEER WAL-MART S2R3S INC!!!1! OMG WTF LOL THIS WUT!1!1!111 LOL NO MERCHANDIES FOR US U BOYS AND ANIMATION GEKS?!!??!1111?!!!!?! OMG LITL3 GIRLS AERNT DA ONLY CARBON BAESD LIEFFORMS WIT CASH U KNOW TAHT DONT U?!??? WTF LOL


    BOYS WIL GET A TEL3VISION SEREIS BAESD ON DA ANIMAETD BLOKBUSTER LILO AND STITCH WHICH WIL R3V UP TEH MARKET FOR PRODUCT TEI-INS11!11


    TAHT IS A GOD EXMPLA OF A PRODUCT TAHT GOES FROM THAATRICAL SUCES 2 DVD SUCES BUT RILLY DA BIG PAYOF IN MERCHANDISNG T3RMS COMES WHAN IT MIGRAETS 2 TV MONEY SADE!11!11 OMG WTF


    HA DOWNPLAEYD DA IMPORTANCE ON DA BOTOM LIEN OF TEH DISNEY S2RES1!!!!!! WTF DISNAY HAS CLOS3D ABOUT 40 S2R3S THIS Y3AR TAKNG TEH 2TAL NAAR DA GOAL OF 503 FOR S3PTAMBR TEH AND OF FISCAL 203!!1!1111 OMG LOL DISNEY TARG3TS 405 IN A FEW YEARS WIT A GRE8R CHANCE OF CLOSNG MOR3 THAN 3XPANDNG MONEY SADE!!!1!11! OMG WTF LOL TEH S2RES SEL ONLY ABOUT 5 P3RCANT OF 2TAL DISNEY MERCHANDIES ALTHOUGH WIT A $30 MILION R3NOVATION PLAN IN TEH WORKS THEY WIL ACOUNT FOR MUCH OF TEH CAPITAL 3XP3NDITURES DA DIVISION PLANS IN TEH N3XT FOUR 2 FIEV YAARS MON3Y SADE!!!1!1! WTF LOL


    TAHT WIL KEP CAPITAL 3XPANDITURES AT REC3NT L3VELS OF ABOUT $70 MILION UP FROM A R3CENT LOW OF $58 MILION IN 202 HE SADE!!!1!!11 LOL

    SUC3SFUL TV PROPARTEIS ON CABLE TELEVISION FOR CHILDR3N WIN OUT IN TEH CONSUM3RS MIND OVER FIRST RUN INTELECTUAL PROP3RTY IN TEH TH38R!!1!!111 OMG WTF LOL
    Hehe.
    WATCH PARANOIA AGENT

    ...please?

  20. #20
    pabcool's Avatar
    pabcool is offline drink. more. smoothie.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Translation
    MANEFAST DESTINY WAS A SLOGAN POPULAR IN DA 1840S1!!1!11 WTF LOL IT WAS USED BY P3OPLA WHO CLAMEED IT WAS GODS WIL FOR DA US11!! WTF LOL 2 EXPAND AL DA WAY 2 TEH PACIFIC OCEAN1!111!1 OMG WTF LOL (PAUSA) THESA PEOPLA DID NOT INCLUDE MANY MEXICANS111!1 OMG LOL -DARIA

    OMGWTF!111!!1!11!11111 ITS DA 3NGLISH 2 AOL SPEAK TRANSLA2R1!1!!1 LOL

    HOMESTAR RUNAR
    WATCH PARANOIA AGENT

    ...please?

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