Another hugging ban

[KCJ506]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21690514/

Ill. student gets detention for hugging

MASCOUTAH, Ill. - Two hugs equals two days of detention for 13-year-old Megan Coulter. The eighth-grader was punished for violating a school policy banning public displays of affection when she hugged two friends Friday.

"I feel it is crazy," said Megan, who was to serve her second detention Tuesday after classes at Mascoutah Middle School.

"I was just giving them a hug goodbye for the weekend," she said.

Megan's mother, Melissa Coulter, said the embraces weren't even real hugs — just an arm around the shoulder and slight squeeze.

"It's hilarious to the point of ridicule," Coulter said. "I'm still dumbfounded that she's having to do this."

District Superintendent Sam McGowen said that he thinks the penalty is fair and that administrators in the school east of St. Louis were following policy in the student handbook.

It states: "Displays of affection should not occur on the school campus at any time. It is in poor taste, reflects poor judgment, and brings discredit to the school and to the persons involved."

Coulter said she and her husband told their daughter to go ahead and serve her detentions because the only other option was a day of suspension for each skipped detention.

"We don't agree with it, but I certainly don't want her to get in more trouble," Coulter said.

The couple plan to attend the next school board meeting to ask board members to consider rewording the policy or be more specific in what is considered a display of affection.

"I'm just hoping the school board will open their eyes and just realize that maybe they shouldn't be punishing us for hugs," Megan said.

Good lord these people are turning children into mindless robotic sheep. They must WANT to get shot up by students. I mean no hugging between two friends, so they are obviously out to teach their students that being friendly to someone is a crime, and you should hate your fellow student. They give out detention for HUGGING, but ignore bulling to the point where the victim just snaps, and shoots the place up trying to take out as many fellow students and they can, then finish up by taking themselves out and then people start blaming video games for it. You have parents who wont discipline their kids at all, and schools that go overboard with it.

*Runs to play Manhunt 2 to vent frustation, because it's a VIDEO GAME, not reality and would never do such things in reality*

[Lavenderpaw]

OMG,again?!

What if two high schoolers (a girl and boy of course ) were caught holding hands while walking to class and got detention for it only to find out that the two were engaged.

[Antiyonder]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21690514/



Good lord these people are turning children into mindless robotic sheep. They must WANT to get shot up by students. I mean no hugging between two friends, so they are obviously out to teach their students that being friendly to someone is a crime, and you should hate your fellow student. They give out detention for HUGGING, but ignore bulling to the point where the victim just snaps, and shoots the place up trying to take out as many fellow students and they can, then finish up by taking themselves out and then people start blaming video games for it. You have parents who wont discipline their kids at all, and schools that go overboard with it.

*Runs to play Manhunt 2 to vent frustation, because it's a VIDEO GAME, not reality and would never do such things in reality*

Makes the Post-Crisis portrayal of Krypton to be a warm easy going society.

[Swordfish_II]

In five years, we'll be expelling kids for making eye contact.

[Kurokawa41]

Kids hug just because they want to feel each other anyway. It's stupid.

[Kury Wagner]

This is just ridiculous, really. Fascist as hell, imo.

OMG,again?!

What if two high schoolers (a girl and boy of course ) were caught holding hands while walking to class and got detention for it only to find out that the two were engaged.

Ahem... nothing wrong with two people of the same sex holding hands. Don't be that way, yo.

[Wounded_Dragon]

Well, the reasoning comes from a desire to avoid it becoming more than "just a hug." And a desire to avoid criminal and civil liability.

[Antiyonder]

Well, the reasoning comes from a desire to avoid it becoming more than "just a hug." And a desire to avoid criminal and civil liability.

So why don't schools up the lack of tolerance for bullying?

[Wounded_Dragon]

So why don't schools up the lack of tolerance for bullying?

There is an increase in anti-bullying measures, compared to having none only a decade or so ago. It doesn't help that a lot of research had to be taken from overseas since no one wanted to look at bullying in the US for a long time.

But there are priorities schools have to set on where to budget their time and attention. Frankly, with NCLB, most of the focus goes towards passing achievement tests so the school doesn't get shut down.

[Antiyonder]

But there are priorities schools have to set on where to budget their time and attention. Frankly, with NCLB, most of the focus goes towards passing achievement tests so the school doesn't get shut down.

Then I'd think that dealing with bullies would be a greater priority than students who are being friendly. I mean which one is more likely to result in a school shooting? Student who is hugged or given a wedge?

After all getting bullied can hamper a students performance just as much as a hug/hand holding.

[mookie75]

Then I'd think that dealing with bullies would be a greater priority than students who are being friendly. I mean which one is more likely to result in a school shooting? Student who is hugged or given a wedgie?

I don't know about that logic. If I was an angry, isolated student who felt that he had no control over said isolation, I would probably just get angrier watching other students exchange hugs in the hallway.

These kids could easily save the groping for once they leave the school building, so let's stop making this sound like it's some great tragedy that one student can't hug another in school.

[Punisher]

These kids could easily save the groping for once they leave the school building, so let's stop making this sound like it's some great tragedy that one student can't hug another in school.

I agree completely. Plus, when you look at it, these bannings are pretty much only in middle schools, where I don't know about you guys but the two middle schools I went to had strict rules about PDA; save it for after the bell. This isn't a tragedy or anything, that stuff doesn't have a place in middle school.

And to call this fascist is retarded.

[Michael24]

As others have said, this is just ridiculous. Not being allowed to give a friend a hug on the playground? I definitely fear what schools will be like once I have kids.

[Antiyonder]

These kids could easily save the groping for once they leave the school building, so let's stop making this sound like it's some great tragedy that one student can't hug another in school.

Because we all know that wedgies and dropping a student in a trash can is more acceptable right?

Look, I'm not complaining about the rules, just that they come acrossed as selective when enforcing the rule. Sorry, but when a students roughs up another student and just gets a slap on the wrist (not literally) while the students who shake hands get the third degree (again, not literally).

And please, read fully, rather than skimming before you comment.

[mookie75]

Because we all know that wedgies and dropping a student in a trash can is more acceptable right?

Look, I'm not complaining about the rules, just that they come acrossed as selective when enforcing the rule. Sorry, but when a students roughs up another student and just gets a slap on the wrist (not literally) while the students who shake hands get the third degree (again, not literally).

And please, read fully, rather than skimming before you comment.

I think you were the one who did the skimming, my friend, because I really don't see how you assumed that I thought bullying was acceptable based on the portion of my post that you quoted (or any of my post for that matter). You were trying to argue that bullying is more likely to bring about a school shooting and I was disagreeing with your logic by stating that I could see how hugs in the hallway could create plenty of ill feelings as well.

I guess I didn't spell it out well enough the first time, so I'm spelling it out now. At no point did I imply that bullying was acceptable. And frankly, I find your accusation that I just "skimmed" your post to be insulting. I read the entire thread, and I decided to put in my two cents. I was bullied plenty in elementary, junior AND high school and the isolation that it created would have caused me to feel very upset if I always saw other students hugging in the hallway because it would have made me think "Why is that never me? Why does that guy get hugged while I get a punch in the gut in the boys restroom?" Of course, I went to school back in a time when shootings weren't nearly as common because we hadn't seen them on the news in order to give us the idea. Finding a gun wouldn't have been a problem since my father was a hunter, but thankfully I was never the kind of person that would consider such a course of action.

As for those who get punished and those who don't, I would say that the bullies that get away with bullying probably do so because they're smart enough to do it when the grown ups aren't watching, and not every kid who gets bullied is gutsy enough to turn them in. I can't speak for other schools, but the bullies in my school got in trouble plenty of times -- the problem was that they simply didn't care and kept doing it anyway. They certainly didn't run to the media and try to vilify the school, that's for sure.

These kids aren't going to be warped for life if they can't give each other a "have a good weekend" hug. High school means so very little in the grander scheme of things anyway...but there's no reason for everyone to jump on me for that statement because I'm fully aware that it comes from my own jaded view on that period of life. Everyone may not agree with it, but does anyone honestly think that the girl in this article is going to be sitting at her job 40 years from now and thinking about how different her life would have been if she hadn't gotten detention for that "have a good weekend" hug? I somehow doubt it.

*sigh* I should know better by now than to post in these "Why does the world suck sometimes?!" threads................

[Antiyonder]

I think you were the one who did the skimming, my friend, because I really don't see how you assumed that I thought bullying was acceptable based on the portion of my post that you quoted (or any of my post for that matter). You were trying to argue that bullying is more likely to bring about a school shooting and I was disagreeing with your logic by stating that I could see how hugs in the hallway could create plenty of ill feelings as well.

I guess I didn't spell it out well enough the first time, so I'm spelling it out now. At no point did I imply that bullying was acceptable. And frankly, I find your accusation that I just "skimmed" your post to be insulting. I read the entire thread, and I decided to put in my two cents. I was bullied plenty in elementary, junior AND high school and the isolation that it created would have caused me to feel very upset if I always saw other students hugging in the hallway because it would have made me think "Why is that never me? Why does that guy get hugged while I get a punch in the gut in the boys restroom?" Of course, I went to school back in a time when shootings weren't nearly as common because we hadn't seen them on the news in order to give us the idea. Finding a gun wouldn't have been a problem since my father was a hunter, but thankfully I was never the kind of person that would consider such a course of action.

These kids aren't going to be warped for life if they can't give each other a "have a good weekend" hug. High school means so very little in the grander scheme of things anyway...but there's no reason for everyone to jump on me for that statement because I'm fully aware that it comes from my own jaded view on that period of life. Everyone may not agree with it, but does anyone honestly think that the girl in this article is going to be sitting at her job 40 years from now and thinking about how different her life had been if she didn't get detention for that "have a good weekend" hug? I somehow doubt it.

*sigh* I should know better by now than to post in these "Why does the world suck sometimes?!" threads................

I figured you were skimming, cause it sounds like you find me complaining about the rules, when I'm complaining about the double standards of the rules. Double Standards are the problem. If the rules were enforced with consistently, then I wouldn't have had any reason to post here.

They should put the same effort into the cutting down on bullying as well. That's part of the problem with authority figures. They convenient are around when a minor offense is being commited, but are usually absent when the big rules are being violated. Take our neighborhood pool. There's a policy against wearing non swimming clothes in a pool, which is fair. Oddly, the people who get caught are the ones who only wear a tshirt at the most. Yet those who come in with excessive amounts of clothing (including shoes and socks) never seem to get caught.

[mookie75]

I figured you were skimming, cause it sounds like you find me complaining about the rules, when I'm complaining about the double standards of the rules. Double Standards are the problem. If the rules were enforced with consistently, then I wouldn't have had any reason to post here.

They should put the same effort into the cutting down on bullying as well. That's part of the problem with authority figures. They convenient are around when a minor offense is being commited, but are usually absent when the big rules are being violated. Take our neighborhood pool. There's a policy against wearing non swimming clothes in a pool, which is fair. Oddly, the people who get caught are the ones who only wear a tshirt at the most. Yet those who come in with excessive amounts of clothing (including shoes and socks) never seem to get caught.

To be honest, the quote from your post was just a jumping off point for me because that's generally how I post. At any rate, my second post has allowed me to say all that I think I need to say on the subject -- including the portion that was missed in your second quote because I was still fine tuning while you were posting (another annoying posting habit that I have: posting, and then editing a dozen times) -- so I'll probably leave this thread to the people that like to carry these things on for days and days.

Enjoy everyone. Keep your eye on the big picture at all times. There's a whole lot of life to live beyond the corridors of your local school.

[Antiyonder]

To be honest, the quote from your post was just a jumping off point for me because that's generally how I post. At any rate, my second post has allowed me to say all that I think I need to say on the subject -- including the portion that was missed in your second quote because I was still fine tuning while you were posting (another annoying posting habit that I have: posting, and then editing a dozen times) -- so I'll probably leave this thread to the people that like to carry these things on for days and days.

It's not that I like to post constantly on these subjects, but the reason I do so is because it seems like people in the debates take a while to make a direct response to the comments they reply to. If you respond directly the first time, then the poster before you wouldn't have to repost the same comments again and again.

Enjoy everyone. Keep your eye on the big picture at all times. There's a whole lot of life to live beyond the corridors of your local school.

I've been out of school for a longtime. And double standards happen frequently outside the schoolyard just as much.

[mookie75]

Actually, I lied....I did think of one more thing to say.

I think having rules about PDA in schools is a good thing because in a way it prepares children for the real world.

Why do I say that? Well, I work in a big office building, and if I went around giving all my coworkers hugs to wish them a good weekend, I am certain it wouldn't take long before Human Resources got involved. It simply wouldn't be appropriate in that setting and I'm sure that goes for many workplaces. Even if I was only hugging friends, there would likely still be someone within eye-shot that would have a problem with it eventually.

Heck, there would probably be double-standards in that scenario too. If I got in trouble for hugging co-workers, then why didn't the guy who spends 4 hours of company time on the internet every day get in trouble? There's no doubt that double-standards are a bad thing, but they exist everywhere and they won't be going away any time soon.

There, now I think I'm done.

[Zeonic Freak]

OMG,again?!

What if two high schoolers (a girl and boy of course ) were caught holding hands while walking to class and got detention for it only to find out that the two were engaged.

That still counts still.

So i guess you go to detention for hugging, but hitting someone doesnt count, even though you are displaying your feeling of hatred to them and use that to describe it physically.

Idk, i dont go to school or public school for that matter, and even if i did, i dont go around hugging the same sex. Im guessing for the school system, since they think some of the kids are gay, they might take that hugging the same sex is a way to express affection to each other, than a friendly pat.

Worlds still going to get crazy still.

I agree completely. Plus, when you look at it, these bannings are pretty much only in middle schools, where I don't know about you guys but the two middle schools I went to had strict rules about PDA; save it for after the bell. This isn't a tragedy or anything, that stuff doesn't have a place in middle school.

And to call this fascist is retarded.

Yea, i got in trouble in middle school because some girl cried wolf because she "belived" i sexually harrased her because she felt someone touch her butt, and i was the last person she talked too. Whats even more rediculous is that they belived her story because she cried and was upset (total stage set plan) and i had to take the fall for like 5 days lunch detention.

Yea, you tell me if that was fair...