JusSonic
05-27-2003, 09:32 AM
(QC back to the theater as the Histerians came in and sat back down in their seats as the movie resumes itself.)
(The next day at the WB lot, the Warners are running around as usual, and then stop.
[Loud: THEY SAW HEEELLLLLOOO NURSE!]
They see a large group of Old Kids WB! Stars,
[Charity: Not Bosco, unfortunately.]
comprised of the people we saw visited by Abyss, but many others: from A! Slappy, Skippy, Rita, Runt, and Mr. Director,
[Toast: The wacky bunch.]
From Patb, Billie,
[Pule: (Timmy) Billie!]
From H! Father Time, Miss Information, Pepper Mills, Chit, and Harry,
[Pule: Harry Norman a part of the show?]
[Charity: Nah. We just made him honorary H! member.]
[Pule: Ah.]
from F! Steph, Professor Jones,
[Toast: Hey, wasn't he in that movie with that robot?]
[Loud: YOU KNOW, YOU'RE RIGHT.]
and Roddy Macstew, from LT, Lola, Speedy, Sylvester, and Tweety,
[All: Mysteries!]
from TTA, Plucky, Hamton, Shirley, Fifi, Gogo, and Elmyra)
[Loud: NOT HER! ANYONE BUT HER!]
[Charity: If she touchs my man once more, she is going to get it, believe you and me.]
[Pule: Oh, we do.]
Wakko: Boy, that's some expo of all our former co-stars. Say, I guess we won't be going around picking up our usual length of characters during the story, because
[Toast: They won't be getting their usual length of characters.]
with these guys, we already have our trademark amount!
Dot: Never be sure with these writers,
[Charity: So the toons are toons by day, writers by night?]
or writer in this case. Let's go see how they went with their meetings with Abyss. (They walk towards the group)
[Pule: And they immediately got thrown out.]
Jones: (To Steph) I gotta tell you Steph,
[Loud: (Jones) MY VOICE ACTOR IS DEAD!]
[Charity: (Steph) Well, use Gary Oldman then. At least he was in that movie with that robot.]
he never been in his Freakalair with these cool stuff!
Steph: Get real Jones!
[Charity: That Jones is dead, Steph.]
Jones: Hey, what's up with that?!
[Pule: You being Jerry Seinfeld.]
Roddy: Nothin, I guess.
Freakazoid: He's right Jones.
(Then Axel walks in to the group)
Axel: Well, well, well, so the former animated stars visited by Abyss is complete.
[Loud: WHAT WRONG WITH AXEL? HE SUPPOSED TO SWEAR LIKE (BLEEP)ING THIS!]
[Pule: What the (bleep) is up with that?]
[Toast: Dude, I don't (bleep)ing know.]
[Charity: Oh, shut the (bleep) up, you guys, before the (bleep)ing censor (bleep)ing censored us.]
[Loud: OH, (BLEEP)ING RIGHT.]
Yakko: He visited you too?
Axel: And why he did, I have no idea, cause I'm not a cartoon!
[Toast: Dude, he was in Shrek.]
Maybe it's because with all my misadventures with you guys over this last year,
[Loud: OR WHATEVER YEAR THIS CRAP TAKES PLACE IN.]
he must'be been that I was, stupid misinformed bad guy!
Father Time: He's also been dead for 2 Years,
[Pule: That didn't stop John Candy.]
so unless he watched your films,
[Charity: Which he doesn't thank goodness.]
but then again after returning from the underworld,
[Toast: Dude, does Hades know?]
why would he place that as a priority, he doesn't know about your original fame.
[Loud: IF ANY.]
Axel: After a whole year of being around you people, he wouldn't be the only one, that's for sure.
Rita: You have got to be kidding me, he never been destoyed of his life.
[Charity: One point for Rita there.]
Runt: Gee Rita, he wouldn't visited Abyss in the alley, yeah definitely in the alley.
[Toast: (Rainman) This movie is full of it, yeah, definitely, full of it.]
Rita: But Runt, Abyss would never sneeked up in the area.
[Pule: What the heck is sneeked?]
Axel: I don't know about you guys, I never been visited by Abyss.
[Pule: Uh, he did, didn't he?]
Slappy: (Bitter) Big deal, so you have an excuse for seeing him, good for you!
Skippy: Gee Aunt Slappy, you're more bitter than usual today.
[Loud: YOU CAN GIVE HER A BIRTHDAY PRESENT AND THAT SQUIRREL CAN STILL BE BITTER.]
Slappy: What do you expect after what he did to me?!
[Charity: I won't ask.]
When I tried to blow him up like I do to any non-handsome man who comes up,
[Toast: Like Leonardo DiCaprio, dude.]
he put on 5 layers of armor and didn't get blown to kingdom come, he said he knew me too well to be blown up! Some way to end a 2 Year winning streak.
[Toast: Streak? Where?]
Plucky: So you didn't get to blow someone up for once, you were stopped by a crazy nut!
[Charity: He means Jerry Lewis.]
He said that I wasn't great and I was one of the few that think I am,
[Loud: WOULD THE REST BE HIM?]
now how logical is that?!
Hamton: I don't know Plucky, if you think Abyss just visited my house, I asked him how well you train.
[Pule: This guy got trained by his drunken parents. Plucky, I mean.]
Plucky: Thanks for realizing that Hamton.
[Charity: (Plucky) Now sit down.]
Pepper: AH HA HA! That Abyss is a grouch! He wouldn't even signed my autograph book,
[Toast: Gah. Like he was so mean-age to my girl there.]
I gotta get his autograph as soon as he approaches.
Chit: Good idea Pepper.
[Pule: (Chit) And I will annoy him by asking him to buy my books.]
Speedy: He put a brick wall in front of me to make me stop running so I could speak to him.
[Loud: (Speedy) SENIOR.]
Sylvester: A brick wall, why didn't I ever think of that?
[Loud: BECAUSE YOU ARE STUPID?]
It would've saved me time and a lot of hospital bills.
Daffy: You and me both, brother.
[Toast: So Daffy didn't want any more bills to his face?]
[Charity: Say what?]
[Toast: You know, hospital bills.]
Lola: That wouldn't be a plan Daffy.
Elmyra: I like him, he said I'd get to see my beloved mousies again!
[Charity: But step away from my man, witch.]
They must be so lonely after leaving me to go to Washington, I have to save them!
[Pule: Yeah, but who would save them?]
Where are they?
Billie: What will we do?
Brain: I got it!
[Loud: (Brain) OH, NO I DON'T. WHO AM I KIDDING?]
(He turns on the megaphone)
Brain: (V.O. and louder than usual) Oh Elmyra?!
Elmyra: (Gasps) Cranky big head mousie! Where are you?
[Charity: Not in this movie.]
Brain: (V.O.) I'm right in front of the studio and not in this gaggle of former cartoon icons.
[Toast: Dude, we still are cartoon icons. What is the Brain talking about?]
Elmyra: That's him,
[Pule: Or someone liked him.]
he said I'd recognize those big words anywhere! Don't worry mousies, I'm coming!
[Pule: Oh, that would give them any reason to worry.]
(She runs away and we now see that the mice are hiding in Buster's shirt pocket
[Loud: WHICH HASN'T BEEN CLEAN IN A MONTH. PEE U!]
and Brain is holding a mouse size megaphone.)
[Toast: Dude, we already know that! Quit telling us things we already knew!]
Brain: Again, my greatest of thanks Buster for
[Charity: This award.]
hiding us so we could get her outta here.
Buster: My pleasure,
[Toast: (Buster) Now pay up!]
I myself
[Charity: And Irene.]
know the pains of living with her.
Pinky: Aw, couldn't we at least have said hi to her Brain?
Brain: No Pinky, any animal that says hi to her is in even more trouble than you are if you say hi to that Walken fellow.
[Loud: (dry) IF HE MEANS ZARRET, I KNOW WHAT HE MEANS.]
And now that's she's gone,
[Pule: Let's wrestle!]
[Charity: Oh, not again. No, Pule.]
[Pule: Come on, just a little bit of wrestling please?]
[Loud: NO!]
[Pule: Nuts!]
I can join into this conversation. Now, we need to figure out one important question,
[Charity: Who killed Kenny?]
just how Abyss got here to visit us all yesterday?
Miss Info: Maybe, He was walking and stopping for visiting houses.
Slappy: No way, how could even be here because he's been dead for 2 Years! Geez, how mixed up can you get?
[Loud: HEY, NO MAKING FUN OF MY FRIEND, OKAY? ME AND CHARITY DON'T WANT TO GIVE YOU THE SAME PUNISHMENT AS GENE.]
[Charity: Right.]
Miss Info: Well that doesn't really count so being mixed up, because I didn't even know who he was until he visited me, so how could I've known he was dead for long if I never heard of him?
Slappy: Hmm, that actually is a good point there.
[Toast: At least Slappy made up for that mixed-up crack, dude.]
[Loud: GOOD.]
Loud: Not too surprising for someone who truly knows her like me.
[Pule: And that's Charity.]
[Charity: You got that right.]
[(Charity kiss Loud, who blah blah blah blah.)]
Brain: If we finished with this comic relief,
[Loud: STARRING MARTIN SHORT.]
I shall move on. Maybe something strang happened recently that explains why he's here. Have any of you seen or heard anything unusual lately,
[Pule: (Brain) Like the man filming us right now?]
there might be a connection between that and Abyss's revival.
Dot: Wait a minute,
[All: You know you make me want to shout!]
the executives didn't come to us about Jelly phenomenom,
[Toast: Why don't you just forget the Jelly for once?!]
[Loud: PURE STUPID PLOT POINT!]
and they didn't promote it as much as they usually do, that's very very unusual.
Pinky: I was wondering why I didn't see more of those coupons we used to be in, narf!
Brain: For the las time,
[Charity: Shut up!]
don't remind of those coupons we were made to do! But that point is rather strange.
Yakko: Yeah, they also haven't been speaking to us
[Loud: THEY NEVER SPEAK TO THEM.]
and when they do,
[Charity: They will wish they were dead.]
they're really nervous abou it. Then again, that's what they always are
[Toast: A bunch of idiots.]
towards us because they know their usual imcomptance will make them our new special friends,
[Pule: For life.]
but they've been even more so than usual lately.
Fifi: Could zhis strange behavior be connected with Abyss's return? Shirley, could you answer zhat question for me?
[Pule: (Shirley) Like, no.]
Shirley: (Looking into her Crystal ball)
[Charity: Okay, no sick jokes, you guys.]
[Toast/Pule/Loud: Who, us?]
[Charity: Rrrriiiggghhhtt.]
I already knew you would, like, ask me that, so I already started asking my ball that, or some junk.
[Loud: THAT IS WHAT THAT CRYSTAL BALL IS.]
Okay ball,
[Toast: Start talking!]
are those idiotic WB executives connected with Abyss's totally strange appearances lately?
Voice: (From the ball and like the AOL voice) You've got answers!
[Toast: (Crystal ball) And a scratch down there! (Laughing)]
(The ball reads, "Bet
[Loud: TEN DOLLARS.]
like, big time on it")
Daffy: So it's their fault! We gave them the best years of or comedic talent,
[Charity: If any.]
some bigger than others,
[Pule: (Daffy) Like me.]
and they pay us back like this, those ingrates! Notices I didn't say you're despicable, I'm working on expanding my horizons.
Yakko: In any case,
[Charity: Let's go home and hide under the bed.]
I think we should have a talk with a certain network boss.
Roddy: Good idea.
[Pule: (Roddy) I knew we hired you as captain for a reason.]
(Cut to inside Kellner's office as Kellner's pacing around)
Kellner: Thank goodness it looks like
[Loud: DENVER.]
he finally came back, now I just have to hold out a few minutes longer.
[Charity: He doesn't want to go to the bathroom and have an "accident".]
It's almost shocking that I could hide it this long from them.
Cosgrove: (V.O.) I want a can of hash and some coffee.
[All: (laughing)]
(The grouf of Toons come in)
Kellner: WHOA! How did you guys get here?!
[Toast: Through the back door, dude.]
Professor Jones: We don't want even know that get got here!
[Pule: Stop mumbling, professor!]
Kellner: Wait a minute, I didn't include you in Jelly Palooza
[Pule: Another crapper?]
like I always do so you shouldn't be this angry at me!
[Charity: At least, not until tomorrow.]
I've nothing to hide.
Yakko: I guess it's time for the old trademark interrogation scene to proove that you are.
[Toast: Rupert Murdoch.]
I'll need a light and
[Loud: A YOUNG PRIEST.]
a detective's uniform.
Roddy: Why me?
[Toast: He needs your kilt.]
(The lights go off and an overhead light is placed over Kellner
[Pule: Watch this. Now he hits his head on the light!]
as Yakko makes him sit down on a chair, wearing a detective uniform, the scene is now like the trademark interrogation atmosphere)
[Loud: I HOPE WE DON'T SEE DENNIS FRANZ'S BUTT.]
Kellner: You're making fools of yourselves, but when that's new?
[Charity: Last week.]
Yakko: We'll let your answers be the announcer of that. Speaking of that, what do you know about Abyss?
[Charity: (Kellner) Well, it is a crappy movie. Why?]
Kellner: (Nervous) Him?
[Pule: Not Him! Abyss, stupid!]
naa, well he was a boss of Marvel Vs. Capcom 2 of his 3 forms! I'm certainly glad he's not around today to take his advantage.
[Loud: OF WHAT? WE DO NOT KNOW.]
Yakko: Then prepare to be unhappy.
[Toast: Not like Charity Bazaar.]
[Charity: Thanks.]
how do you explain the fact that all of us were visited yesterday by
[Loud: 3 GHOSTS.]
someone who looked and sounded exactly like him and is probably Mr. Abyss himself?!
Kellner: Well, they were showing the intro Mr. Yakko Warner,
[Pule: (Yakko) Never called me mister!]
they seen him when is says "3 fighters vs. Abyss" on it.
Yakko: That's funny,
[Charity: No, it isn't.]
I don't recall seeing Abyss with his poweful moves like he showed to these people yesterday.
Kellner: It must be a new Capcom video game technique,
[Toast: Since when, dude?!]
you know they come up with so many new revolutionary special FX.
[Loud: FOX X-MEN.]
Did you know that.
Yakko: (Upset) Did you know that you're lying? You don't know what we can do to you to make you talk.
Kellner: (Laughs) You actually think I, your old boss, don't know what you can do to me? Tee hee hee,
[Charity: They are ticking him with a feather.]
go ahead, I know all your tricks, I can't be fooled by any of your gags,
[Toast: Try gagging him instead.]
nor can I be fooled by Bugs' wit, Slappy's explosion, Speedy's speed, Loud's yelling, Fifi's smell, or Freakazoid with that whooshing sound, because I know them all!
[Pule: Was he really paying that much attention to us?]
[Loud: I GUESS.]
(The ones Kellner mentioned groan because they were just about to try those gags)
Slappy: Geez, did the whole world get smarter overnight?
Billie: Trust me and Eggy,
[Pule: Who's Eggy?]
[Charity: The Brain, Pule.]
that question isn't workable.
Gogo: You said it.
Axel: Step aside you crazy Toons
[Loud: (Axel) MR. MOTHER(BLEEP)ER IS HERE!]
I'll handle this.
(Then the lights go back on)
Axel: (To Kellner) You know, as a network boss you
[Toast: Deserve to die, dude!]
see a lot of *** awful movie scripts,
[Charity: Like the script to this movie.]
but as the one that has to work from them, I know more so how awful they are. Let me show you some of the terrible scripts I had to work with, so check them out.
[Toast: If you dare, dude.]
(He pulls out several scripts)
Kellner: (Gasps in shock) Beverly Hills Cop 2 & 3?!
[Pule: So Axel's movies are parodies of Police Academy?]
Another 48 Hours?!
[Loud: UNTIL THIS MOVIE IS OVER?!]
[All: (fearfully) No!]
Metro?! Holy Man?!
[Charity: Batman!]
(He gasps again) No, not the Golden Child Too!
[Charity: (Kellner) And I just bought him!]
Axel: That's right, read all my trashy movies,
[Pule: (Axel) And then (bleep) them!]
and I have lots more awful ones from another dang studios that I won't have to show if you talk.
Hamton: Better not be all that pork!
[Loud: THAT WAS A STUPID PARODY, IF YOU ASK ME.]
[Toast: No one has, dude.]
Kellner: Get those things away from me!
[Toast: Zip up your pants, dude!]
Axel: Not before you read a script that your own company approved, for some reason they thought it'd be a good movie, but now read what turned into the big ol' movie of the new millenium! (He pulls out another script)
[Loud: (Kellner) IT'S THE SCRIPT TO THIS MOVIE, NOOOO!!]
Kellner: B-Battlefield: Earth?! No, stop,
[Toast: In the name of love!]
anything but that!! Okay, I confess, I'm guilty,
[Charity: Of being in this movie.]
just no more awful scripts! We were planning to bring back something that would make sure you people didn't interfere with our coupons, and Abyss turned out to be it!
[Pule: One of those people who interfere with their coupons? Yeah, I believed it.]
Now he's coming to snatch the Jelly away from those kids because I told you about it! (He cries)
Babs: For someone like you, it would almost be a logical reason. But why didn't you tell us in secret so Abyss wouldn't know?
Kellner: He has the entire lot bugged so he'd know everything I told you,
[Loud: HOLD ON! NOW I KNOW THIS DIRECTOR IS STEALING SOME LINES FROM TOONS AND DOOM!]
[Toast: Plus, where did it say that Abyss bugged the whole lot?!]
[Charity: That is totally stupid, believe me.]
[Pule: Yeah again.]
he's adapted to technology well. And he's probably on his way to interview us with all that coupons.
(Just then, a knock on Kellner's door is heard)
[Charity: It's the pizza. I'll pay.]
Kellner: All right, who's there? If it's him, please
[Toast: Kill him.]
be nice to Abyss will ya.
Mr. Director: Hoyle, not him!
[Pule: Not Adam Sandler, no!]
Buster: Quick, cover your ears so you can't hear it!
(They all do, except for Kellner. but it's no good
[Pule: Neither is this movie.]
since the pounding is loud)
[Loud: NO I'M NOT.]
[Charity: What?]
[Loud: NOT THE POUNDING.]
[Charity: Oh.]
Tweety: Wuckly I can stop hearing that by fwing away! So wong!
[Charity: Tweety must have gotten acting lessons from Dan Quayle.]
(He starts to fly out the window but can still hear the pounding and he comes back) Wats, it's twue, no one can wesist that pounding!
[Toast: Except Dick Birchum.]
Abyss: (V.O.) OPEN THE DARN DOOR KELLNER!!
[Toast: (Abyss) This is the police! You're under arrest for being in this movie longer!]
Rita: No, stay back whoever you are!
(Then Kellner opens the door then Abyss walks in Kellner's office. Everyone except Daffy screamed)
[Charity: Daffy shouldn't screamed. He is used to this by now.]
Porky: oh m-m-my!
[Loud: HE MADE HIM WET HIMSELF!]
Abyss: That's Right, scream all you want!
Lola: If I were you, you never want to go through those Jelly orders. (To Babs) And try to spin into some character thingies again.
Babs: O.K. Lola.
[Pule: Babsy likes to take orders from her new role model.]
Lola: Ahh, remember these nerdluck character try to take over the toon.
[Charity: Actually, they try to enslave them and take them to Moron Mountain.]
[Toast: Dude, that movie wasn't that bad, was it?]
[Loud: NOPE. NOT TO JUSSONIC ANYWAY.]
Abyss: You're right. And do me a favor,
[Loud: SHAVE.]
can you get Roger Rabbit, Jessica Rabbit, & Baby Herman to me,
[Toast: Dude, why would he want them for?]
[Pule: Beats me.]
and a man who defeated me in Capcom Video Game. His name is Justin Lawson.
[Pule: Now he didn't even beat him yet! For crying out loud!]
Tweety: Who's Justin?
Abyss: Never mind, just bring him here understand.
[Loud: YOU SAID NEVER MIND! MAKE UP YOUR MIND, WILL YA?!]
Kellner: Yes sir.
Bugs: You can count on us.
Abyss: Well, I gotta have more meetings to do so take care.
(He leaves and chuckling)
[Pule: He shoulda stay more often.]
Charity: Well somebody's happy!
[Loud: THAT'S THE FIRST TIME SHE SAID THAT IN YEARS.]
[Charity: Amazing, huh?]
Steph: It's true! (She cries)
[Charity: (Steph) Our show did got canceled.]
Freakazoid: Don't cry Steph, we'll make sure that we can meet Roger, Jessica, and Herman.
Cosgrove: O.K. (To Kellner) We better get going now Jamie.
[Toast: I thought he hated him.]
Kellner: Wait, before you go,
[Pule: (Kellner) Pull my finger.]
you'll need Plotz.
Harry: Say what?
Kellner: Mr. Plotz needs you.
[Pule: Yuck! No thanks!]
Plotz: (Comes in by opening the door) Why do I have to do this,
[Loud: BECAUSE YOU ARE MORE STUPID THAN ANYONE ELSE.]
can't you send Melman or Allen instead?
Kellner: No Plotz,
[Charity: That is what this movie is missing.]
[Pule: But he's in this movie, isn't he?]
[Charity: I mean no plot.]
[Pule: Oh.]
Allen or Melman are too busy
[Toast: Smoking, dude.]
interviewing the Game Show Masters.
[Toast: Wait, hold the phone. What Game Show Masters? When did they get into this???]
[Loud: (moaning) I HAVE NO IDEA.]
You'll go with them to Meet Roger, Jessica, and Baby Herman. And you will send Justin down here.
[Loud: (Kellner) OR DIE!]
Plotz: Are you sure?
[Pule: (Kellner) No! Ha ha ha ha ha!]
Kellner: Yes.
Plotz: (To the Toons) All right, let's go meet the rabbits
[Charity: George.]
and their baby.
[Charity: They actually did it?]
[Pule: Eew!]
And we'll send the human down. So are you with me?
[All: No.]
Everyone: YES!
[Loud: NOW!]
Plotz: Kellner, we'll be back.
(Outside the lot a little later on the group is waiting for them)
Charity: Did we give them the right directions on how to get here, because otherwise I don't know why they haven't arrived yet.
[Toast: Dude, they been there before. How hard do they have to look?!]
Freakazoid: Don't worry Charity, they should be any minute now.
Voice 1: (V.O. from Above) How right you are!
[Pule: Pilgrim.]
In fact, look up and see what kind of entrance I hastly thought up!
Voice 2: (V.O. from Above) Me too!
(They look up in the air,
[Loud: NO SUPERMAN REFERENCES YOU GUYS.]
then see a trampoline has fallen onto the ground.
[Pule: We are being invited by mutant clowns!]
Then they see a plane flying above them, and then see something falling out.
[Charity: The post office is trying something new for once.]
That something turns out to be Roger Rabbit and Baby Herman (Voiced by Corey Burton), Screaming uncontrollably as they fall above the trampoline,
[Toast: Dudes, they are always doing that. We don't know why.]
but then they land on it to make a dignified jump onto the ground)
Roger: Ta-da!
[Loud: GREAT! NOW LEAVE...THROUGH THE BACK.]
Baby Herman: Phew! what a landing!
Roger: You said it.
[Charity: (Herman) That is right, I said it. I am the only star of this movie. I can take out all these toons if I wanna to. I am that powerful. Disperse!]
Bugs: Hello Roger and Herman, we're all happy to see that you got here again.
Roger: No problem, as you can see that Judge Doom is gone,
[Toast: At least he won't be in this.]
[Pule: Yeah. No good villain would be caught dead--literally--in this.]
we can feel peaceful.
Bugs: Cool.
Roger: Now Baby Herman, say hello to these folks.
]Pule: (Herman) Let me try. Get bent. No, I guess I can't.]
Baby Helman: Hello.
Everyone: Hello.
[Pule: Now you guys can stop being parrots now.]
Baby Herman: O.K., any questions?
(Hamton raises his hand)
Baby Herman: Yes Hamton?
[Toast: (Hamton) Where's the food?!]
Hamton: Your role is good.
Baby Herman: Thanks, anything else?
[Charity: (raising her hand) Yeah, like why this film is so bad?]
(Plucky raises his hand)
Baby Herman: Yes Plucky?
[Loud: (Plucky) WAIT, NO. I JUST HAVE TO STRETCH.]
Plucky: Where exactly is Roger's wife?
[Toast: She's dead.]
Baby Herman: Good question. (To Roger) Can you get Jessica here to meet with these folks.
Roger: Yes Baby.
Babs: Well, I guess it's time
[Loud: FOR THIS MOVIE TO END! PLEASE!]
for our usual annoyed reactions to their chauvinistic behavior.
Dot: I'm getting tired of that,
[Pule: (Dot) And this movie.]
let's just read magazines while they go nuts so we can't pay attention to them and get annoyed.
[Charity: We are already annoyed because of this.]
Shirley: Like that's a good idea, and it's so different from the usual formula, or some junk.
[Charity: Nothing is better than some junk.]
(Steph giggles)
Roger: Well, since you probably won't be satisfied until she does get here,
[Pule: (Roger) We will entertain for you.]
I may as well get it over with. Jessica, could you come and meet our friends now?
Baby Herman: Yeah.
Sultry Voice: All right Boys, we may as well get it out of the way now than later.
[Toast: Dude, who do they got in there? World's Oldest Woman?]
(Jessica Rabbit then walks in in her usual seductive way. While all the girls are reading magazines like Dot said and don't pay attention to her, all the men go nuts)
[Loud: HA! NICE TRY! I DIDN'T REALLY DO THAT BECAUSE I AM STRUCK WITH CHARITY.]
[Charity: Yeah, no need to try to break us up, Justin.]
[Toast: But you were doing the same thing, Charity. Only to Justin.]
[Charity: That was so pointless.]
[Pule: Ditto.]
Baby Herman: Jessica, I missed you!
[Loud: OH YEAH, I CAN SEE WHY.]
[Pule: Eew!]
[Charity: Loud, don't.]
[Loud: OKAY.]
Jessica: I missed you too, Baby Herman.
[Toast: But not in that way, I hope.]
Roger: And as always, that's exactly why I haven't made up for your lack of anger by creating my own over this.
Freakazoid: Hello, Ms. Rabbit.
[Charity: Geez, he is Freak-a-outta-control.]
Jessica: And you are?
Freakazoid: Freakazoid.
Jessica: Yeah, you're the blue guy with underwear who rescues the city.
[Pule: (Freakazoid sarcastic) No, I like to run around in my undies and scared little children, you doorknob.]
Freakazoid: That's me.
Cosgrove: Hey Freakazoid,
[Loud: YOUR WIFE JUST CALLED!]
tell these girls that they are not reading Playboy Magazines.
Freakazoid: Okay.
[Charity: No wonder I remembered seeing a page of Loud naked.]
[Loud: (embarrassed) Oops. How embarrasing.]
[Pule: How did you get in that issue, Loud?]
[Loud: I was paid to do it. I'm sorry.]
[Charity: That's okay. (playfully) I enjoyed seeing you naked.]
[Loud: (embarrassed again) Oy vey.]
As Freakazoid walks in to the girls are Playboy Magazines, he stopped)
Freakazoid: Excuse me, girls, you shouldn't be reading Playboy Magazines.
Girls: Sorry.
[Toast: Read Wizard magazines instead.]
Brain: I was afraid of that.
[Pule: Playboy magazines? Yeah. I can imagine why.]
[Toast: Dude, you didn't read a Playboy before.]
[Pule: No, but R6 told me what was in it once.]
[Toast: Dude, like sick-age.]
[Pule: I know.]
Now, as happy as we are that you three are here,
[Pule: We don't need you for this!]
you're only 1/2 of what he wants.
Roger: Oh, you're talking about Eddie!
Brain: No,
[Charity: Good, because he didn't want to be involved in any more time-travelling.]
[Loud: OR THIS CRAPPER OF A FILM.]
we already got him down that the last time we faced Doom while ago.
Roger: Oh yeah, now you're talking!
[Toast: Dude, that couldn't be Roger. He doesn't sound right, dude.]
Baby Herman: So, how are we gonna find a warp hole.
[Loud: HAVE YOU DO IT.]
Pinky: Ask Mr. Plotz, poit.
Hamton: I wonder where Elmyra went?
[Toast: Who cares, dude?]
Brain: Don't worry, she'll find us.
[Charity: And then, we'll kill her.]
Jessica: Is Judge Doom still around?
Freakazoid: No.
Jessica: Then who?
[Pule: Someone who named is Wu, that's who!]
Freakazoid: His name is Abyss, and he's back
[Loud: HE'S BACK FROM THE FUTURE.]
Marvel Vs. Capcom 2.
Jessica: Abyss, Hhhmmmmmmm.
[Charity: Does she always have to make sounds like that?]
Roddy: Listen up gang,
[Toast: (Roddy) My tummy rumblin'.]
Mr. Plotz will get Justin Down here
[Pule: And hopefully not make the same mistake as Brain Guy on MST3K.]
so we could battle him,
[Pule: They want to kick the crap out of the director?]
[Toast: Dude, I hope so.]
and we will send coupons of Jelly to those kids.
Rogers: Coupons, why didn't you say so!
[Loud: HE DID SAY SO!]
Roddy: O.K. then, Plotz, can we go and find the warp hole.
[Toast: (Plotz) No.]
Plotz: O.K. Mr. Macstew, if you say so.
Lola: All right, and let's move out.
[Charity: Of this studio and into a better one.]
(The group leaves to go in the station to find a warp hole, and now we see Elmyra still looking around the lot)
Elmyra: Tee hee hee, this game of hide and seek is fun, mousies!
[Toast: Dudes, I don't know why, but I hoped they killed her off and keep her killed.]
It'll be even more fun once I finally find you and take you back home, though I haven't heard you since we begin this game.
[Loud: OR THIS MOVIE.]
Oh well, it'll be well worth the wait!
(We see Abyss seeing the group)
Abyss: Yes, excellent. Go send Justin down Toons.
[Pule: (Abyss though he sounds like Peter Lorre) Yes, yes. That's it. Ha ha ha ha.]
(We cut to Abyss' castle where Dodgers Stadium used to be)
[Charity: And that's bad, why?]
Abyss: Ahhh, this is the life. Will somebody come up to me.
[Charity: He must mean the script writer.]
(Then Dr. Laura comes in)
[Pule: Whoop-dee-doo. Everyone's favorite annoying doctor is here.]
Dr. Laura: You called.
Abyss: I got the Toons under my spell.
[Loud: ALREADY?! WE HAVEN'T BEEN THROUGH HALF THE FILM, AND THAT JERK BRAINWASH US ALREADY?!]
[Toast: Dude, terrible timing.]
Dr. Laura: Affirmative sir.
Abyss: Good, now send them here.
Dr. Laura: Yes sir.
(The Toons are hypnotized by Abyss are as follows: From F! Lobe. From PatB! Snowball. From A! Walter, Sid, and Beany (Who voiced by Bob Joles). From TTA! Foxy, Roxy, (Who voiced by Grey Delisle), and Goopy (Who voiced by Roger Jackson).
[Toast: Which was easy considering that they were already evil to begin with!]
[Charity: And what about the plot with Allen and the TTA guest-stars?! That hasn't been resolved yet!]
[Pule: Those idiots looks like they put a bunch of movies in a bender and push the mixie button.]
Lobe: Hello.
Abyss: It's good to see you that you got here.
Sid the Squid: It's been a pleasure sir.
Walter Wolf: I agree.
Dr. Laura: Good, but when the Toons get here, make sure
[Loud: THEY GET THEIR RAFFLE TICKETS.]
that he can send them to the castle.
Snowball: Yes ma'am.
Lobe: You can count on him.
Abyss: (Chuckling) Well, I gonna talk to the FCC Agents right now.
[Toast: Oh, he means the losers.]
Roxy: How will you do that?
Abyss: Trust me, Roxy.
[Charity: Now he stole a line from Indiana Jones.]
I gotta have some private conversation.
[Pule: (Abyss) For your inevitable murder!]
Roxy: Well O.K.
Abyss: Gotta talk to you later. (He leaves)
Lobe: Well Dr. Laura,
[Loud: (Dr. Laura) I AM NOT DATING YOU. SO FORGET YOU, YOU BRAINY FREAK!]
he will send the Toons right here to fall in our trap.
Dr. Laura: Good, now onto Plan A.
[Charity: Which they don't have.]
(Then, The FCC Agents are in the front door as Abyss approches)
FCC Agent 1: You called sir.
[Toast: (Abyss) No, I called you, dorkheads!]
Abyss: I believe I do.
FCC Agent 2: Well, you must the villan in 3 forms of you.
Abyss: Well, yeah. Something like that.
Agent 1: What brings you here sir.
Abyss: These friends are under my spell.
[Pule: (Agent 2) That's it? I thought you needed our help or something.]
Come on out guys.
[All: No!]
(Then we see his friends are revealed as Burger Students
[Pule: He musta got them out of Burger King.]
as follows: Tina ****s, Jim Rhodes,
[Toast: Dude, wasn't he War Machine?]
[Charity: I think so.]
Jeremy Flathers, Brian Kilteyka,
[Loud: NO THANKS. I DON'T DRINK.]
Jason Phelps, Joe Aynes, Jeff Dombrowski, David Maher, and Emeka Uduma.)
[Charity: Who aren't in this film.]
Abyss: Hello, Tina, Jim, Jeremy, Brian, Jason, Joe, Jeff David, and what's your name?
[Toast: (Emeka) Uh, it's Milhouse. I think.]
Emeka Uduma: I'm Emeka.
Abyss: Emeka, right.
Agent 2: So, what brings you guy here?
[Loud: ABYSS. DUH.]
Jim Rhodes: We will destroy Justin, once and for all.
Brian Kilteyka: We are the villany of Toons, well we're Human Characters.
[Pule: Who shoulda have better lives than this film.]
Jeremy Flathers: Oooohhh! nice horns you got.
Abyss: These aren't the horns Jeremy.
[Charity: Those are his private areas.]
Tina ****s: We send these creatures, that the Toons are gonna ambush our castle, if they approched it.
Joe Aynes: What kind of creatures?
[Charity: Elvis impersonators.]
Tina: Don't ask.
Jeff Dombrowski: How are we gonna do that?
Agent 1: You'll see.
[Toast: Thank you, Ben Stein.]
Jason Phelps: You and me both Agents.
Abyss: Excellent, not get to work.
[Pule: (Jason) Woohoo! Time off!]
Burger Students: Yes sir.
[Loud: AND THEY IMMEDIATELY FORGET WHAT THEY WERE DOING.]
(Inside the lab, the Toons found the warp hole)
[Loud: NO WONDER THIS FILM STUNKS. HERE IS A BIG PLOT HOLE.]
Plotz: Well, we found it gang!
[Pule: What? My lunch?]
Runt: Found what?
Plotz: The Black Hole.
[Charity: Dennis Rodman.]
Runt: Oh.
Plotz: Stand back everybody,
[Toast: Dude, he is going to strip!]
[All: (screaming)]
I'm gonna open up the warp hole.
(Then Plotz opens up the warp hole,
[Loud: AND THEY ALL DIE. THE END.]
the Toons are sounding exciting.
[Charity: Except us, that is.]
We now fade to the real world where Justin and Mike Cutler are in the front parking lot)
Mike Cutler: I gotta tell you Justin,
[Toast: (Mike) I need a better life than this film.]
you're way off!
Justin: You've gotta be kidding me.
Mike Cutler: No, I'm serious.
[Pule: We gotta split.]
(Everyone got up to leave the theater. The movie resumes as they do.)
(Then, the warp hole opens up)
Mike Cutler: What's that?
(Commercial)
(The next day at the WB lot, the Warners are running around as usual, and then stop.
[Loud: THEY SAW HEEELLLLLOOO NURSE!]
They see a large group of Old Kids WB! Stars,
[Charity: Not Bosco, unfortunately.]
comprised of the people we saw visited by Abyss, but many others: from A! Slappy, Skippy, Rita, Runt, and Mr. Director,
[Toast: The wacky bunch.]
From Patb, Billie,
[Pule: (Timmy) Billie!]
From H! Father Time, Miss Information, Pepper Mills, Chit, and Harry,
[Pule: Harry Norman a part of the show?]
[Charity: Nah. We just made him honorary H! member.]
[Pule: Ah.]
from F! Steph, Professor Jones,
[Toast: Hey, wasn't he in that movie with that robot?]
[Loud: YOU KNOW, YOU'RE RIGHT.]
and Roddy Macstew, from LT, Lola, Speedy, Sylvester, and Tweety,
[All: Mysteries!]
from TTA, Plucky, Hamton, Shirley, Fifi, Gogo, and Elmyra)
[Loud: NOT HER! ANYONE BUT HER!]
[Charity: If she touchs my man once more, she is going to get it, believe you and me.]
[Pule: Oh, we do.]
Wakko: Boy, that's some expo of all our former co-stars. Say, I guess we won't be going around picking up our usual length of characters during the story, because
[Toast: They won't be getting their usual length of characters.]
with these guys, we already have our trademark amount!
Dot: Never be sure with these writers,
[Charity: So the toons are toons by day, writers by night?]
or writer in this case. Let's go see how they went with their meetings with Abyss. (They walk towards the group)
[Pule: And they immediately got thrown out.]
Jones: (To Steph) I gotta tell you Steph,
[Loud: (Jones) MY VOICE ACTOR IS DEAD!]
[Charity: (Steph) Well, use Gary Oldman then. At least he was in that movie with that robot.]
he never been in his Freakalair with these cool stuff!
Steph: Get real Jones!
[Charity: That Jones is dead, Steph.]
Jones: Hey, what's up with that?!
[Pule: You being Jerry Seinfeld.]
Roddy: Nothin, I guess.
Freakazoid: He's right Jones.
(Then Axel walks in to the group)
Axel: Well, well, well, so the former animated stars visited by Abyss is complete.
[Loud: WHAT WRONG WITH AXEL? HE SUPPOSED TO SWEAR LIKE (BLEEP)ING THIS!]
[Pule: What the (bleep) is up with that?]
[Toast: Dude, I don't (bleep)ing know.]
[Charity: Oh, shut the (bleep) up, you guys, before the (bleep)ing censor (bleep)ing censored us.]
[Loud: OH, (BLEEP)ING RIGHT.]
Yakko: He visited you too?
Axel: And why he did, I have no idea, cause I'm not a cartoon!
[Toast: Dude, he was in Shrek.]
Maybe it's because with all my misadventures with you guys over this last year,
[Loud: OR WHATEVER YEAR THIS CRAP TAKES PLACE IN.]
he must'be been that I was, stupid misinformed bad guy!
Father Time: He's also been dead for 2 Years,
[Pule: That didn't stop John Candy.]
so unless he watched your films,
[Charity: Which he doesn't thank goodness.]
but then again after returning from the underworld,
[Toast: Dude, does Hades know?]
why would he place that as a priority, he doesn't know about your original fame.
[Loud: IF ANY.]
Axel: After a whole year of being around you people, he wouldn't be the only one, that's for sure.
Rita: You have got to be kidding me, he never been destoyed of his life.
[Charity: One point for Rita there.]
Runt: Gee Rita, he wouldn't visited Abyss in the alley, yeah definitely in the alley.
[Toast: (Rainman) This movie is full of it, yeah, definitely, full of it.]
Rita: But Runt, Abyss would never sneeked up in the area.
[Pule: What the heck is sneeked?]
Axel: I don't know about you guys, I never been visited by Abyss.
[Pule: Uh, he did, didn't he?]
Slappy: (Bitter) Big deal, so you have an excuse for seeing him, good for you!
Skippy: Gee Aunt Slappy, you're more bitter than usual today.
[Loud: YOU CAN GIVE HER A BIRTHDAY PRESENT AND THAT SQUIRREL CAN STILL BE BITTER.]
Slappy: What do you expect after what he did to me?!
[Charity: I won't ask.]
When I tried to blow him up like I do to any non-handsome man who comes up,
[Toast: Like Leonardo DiCaprio, dude.]
he put on 5 layers of armor and didn't get blown to kingdom come, he said he knew me too well to be blown up! Some way to end a 2 Year winning streak.
[Toast: Streak? Where?]
Plucky: So you didn't get to blow someone up for once, you were stopped by a crazy nut!
[Charity: He means Jerry Lewis.]
He said that I wasn't great and I was one of the few that think I am,
[Loud: WOULD THE REST BE HIM?]
now how logical is that?!
Hamton: I don't know Plucky, if you think Abyss just visited my house, I asked him how well you train.
[Pule: This guy got trained by his drunken parents. Plucky, I mean.]
Plucky: Thanks for realizing that Hamton.
[Charity: (Plucky) Now sit down.]
Pepper: AH HA HA! That Abyss is a grouch! He wouldn't even signed my autograph book,
[Toast: Gah. Like he was so mean-age to my girl there.]
I gotta get his autograph as soon as he approaches.
Chit: Good idea Pepper.
[Pule: (Chit) And I will annoy him by asking him to buy my books.]
Speedy: He put a brick wall in front of me to make me stop running so I could speak to him.
[Loud: (Speedy) SENIOR.]
Sylvester: A brick wall, why didn't I ever think of that?
[Loud: BECAUSE YOU ARE STUPID?]
It would've saved me time and a lot of hospital bills.
Daffy: You and me both, brother.
[Toast: So Daffy didn't want any more bills to his face?]
[Charity: Say what?]
[Toast: You know, hospital bills.]
Lola: That wouldn't be a plan Daffy.
Elmyra: I like him, he said I'd get to see my beloved mousies again!
[Charity: But step away from my man, witch.]
They must be so lonely after leaving me to go to Washington, I have to save them!
[Pule: Yeah, but who would save them?]
Where are they?
Billie: What will we do?
Brain: I got it!
[Loud: (Brain) OH, NO I DON'T. WHO AM I KIDDING?]
(He turns on the megaphone)
Brain: (V.O. and louder than usual) Oh Elmyra?!
Elmyra: (Gasps) Cranky big head mousie! Where are you?
[Charity: Not in this movie.]
Brain: (V.O.) I'm right in front of the studio and not in this gaggle of former cartoon icons.
[Toast: Dude, we still are cartoon icons. What is the Brain talking about?]
Elmyra: That's him,
[Pule: Or someone liked him.]
he said I'd recognize those big words anywhere! Don't worry mousies, I'm coming!
[Pule: Oh, that would give them any reason to worry.]
(She runs away and we now see that the mice are hiding in Buster's shirt pocket
[Loud: WHICH HASN'T BEEN CLEAN IN A MONTH. PEE U!]
and Brain is holding a mouse size megaphone.)
[Toast: Dude, we already know that! Quit telling us things we already knew!]
Brain: Again, my greatest of thanks Buster for
[Charity: This award.]
hiding us so we could get her outta here.
Buster: My pleasure,
[Toast: (Buster) Now pay up!]
I myself
[Charity: And Irene.]
know the pains of living with her.
Pinky: Aw, couldn't we at least have said hi to her Brain?
Brain: No Pinky, any animal that says hi to her is in even more trouble than you are if you say hi to that Walken fellow.
[Loud: (dry) IF HE MEANS ZARRET, I KNOW WHAT HE MEANS.]
And now that's she's gone,
[Pule: Let's wrestle!]
[Charity: Oh, not again. No, Pule.]
[Pule: Come on, just a little bit of wrestling please?]
[Loud: NO!]
[Pule: Nuts!]
I can join into this conversation. Now, we need to figure out one important question,
[Charity: Who killed Kenny?]
just how Abyss got here to visit us all yesterday?
Miss Info: Maybe, He was walking and stopping for visiting houses.
Slappy: No way, how could even be here because he's been dead for 2 Years! Geez, how mixed up can you get?
[Loud: HEY, NO MAKING FUN OF MY FRIEND, OKAY? ME AND CHARITY DON'T WANT TO GIVE YOU THE SAME PUNISHMENT AS GENE.]
[Charity: Right.]
Miss Info: Well that doesn't really count so being mixed up, because I didn't even know who he was until he visited me, so how could I've known he was dead for long if I never heard of him?
Slappy: Hmm, that actually is a good point there.
[Toast: At least Slappy made up for that mixed-up crack, dude.]
[Loud: GOOD.]
Loud: Not too surprising for someone who truly knows her like me.
[Pule: And that's Charity.]
[Charity: You got that right.]
[(Charity kiss Loud, who blah blah blah blah.)]
Brain: If we finished with this comic relief,
[Loud: STARRING MARTIN SHORT.]
I shall move on. Maybe something strang happened recently that explains why he's here. Have any of you seen or heard anything unusual lately,
[Pule: (Brain) Like the man filming us right now?]
there might be a connection between that and Abyss's revival.
Dot: Wait a minute,
[All: You know you make me want to shout!]
the executives didn't come to us about Jelly phenomenom,
[Toast: Why don't you just forget the Jelly for once?!]
[Loud: PURE STUPID PLOT POINT!]
and they didn't promote it as much as they usually do, that's very very unusual.
Pinky: I was wondering why I didn't see more of those coupons we used to be in, narf!
Brain: For the las time,
[Charity: Shut up!]
don't remind of those coupons we were made to do! But that point is rather strange.
Yakko: Yeah, they also haven't been speaking to us
[Loud: THEY NEVER SPEAK TO THEM.]
and when they do,
[Charity: They will wish they were dead.]
they're really nervous abou it. Then again, that's what they always are
[Toast: A bunch of idiots.]
towards us because they know their usual imcomptance will make them our new special friends,
[Pule: For life.]
but they've been even more so than usual lately.
Fifi: Could zhis strange behavior be connected with Abyss's return? Shirley, could you answer zhat question for me?
[Pule: (Shirley) Like, no.]
Shirley: (Looking into her Crystal ball)
[Charity: Okay, no sick jokes, you guys.]
[Toast/Pule/Loud: Who, us?]
[Charity: Rrrriiiggghhhtt.]
I already knew you would, like, ask me that, so I already started asking my ball that, or some junk.
[Loud: THAT IS WHAT THAT CRYSTAL BALL IS.]
Okay ball,
[Toast: Start talking!]
are those idiotic WB executives connected with Abyss's totally strange appearances lately?
Voice: (From the ball and like the AOL voice) You've got answers!
[Toast: (Crystal ball) And a scratch down there! (Laughing)]
(The ball reads, "Bet
[Loud: TEN DOLLARS.]
like, big time on it")
Daffy: So it's their fault! We gave them the best years of or comedic talent,
[Charity: If any.]
some bigger than others,
[Pule: (Daffy) Like me.]
and they pay us back like this, those ingrates! Notices I didn't say you're despicable, I'm working on expanding my horizons.
Yakko: In any case,
[Charity: Let's go home and hide under the bed.]
I think we should have a talk with a certain network boss.
Roddy: Good idea.
[Pule: (Roddy) I knew we hired you as captain for a reason.]
(Cut to inside Kellner's office as Kellner's pacing around)
Kellner: Thank goodness it looks like
[Loud: DENVER.]
he finally came back, now I just have to hold out a few minutes longer.
[Charity: He doesn't want to go to the bathroom and have an "accident".]
It's almost shocking that I could hide it this long from them.
Cosgrove: (V.O.) I want a can of hash and some coffee.
[All: (laughing)]
(The grouf of Toons come in)
Kellner: WHOA! How did you guys get here?!
[Toast: Through the back door, dude.]
Professor Jones: We don't want even know that get got here!
[Pule: Stop mumbling, professor!]
Kellner: Wait a minute, I didn't include you in Jelly Palooza
[Pule: Another crapper?]
like I always do so you shouldn't be this angry at me!
[Charity: At least, not until tomorrow.]
I've nothing to hide.
Yakko: I guess it's time for the old trademark interrogation scene to proove that you are.
[Toast: Rupert Murdoch.]
I'll need a light and
[Loud: A YOUNG PRIEST.]
a detective's uniform.
Roddy: Why me?
[Toast: He needs your kilt.]
(The lights go off and an overhead light is placed over Kellner
[Pule: Watch this. Now he hits his head on the light!]
as Yakko makes him sit down on a chair, wearing a detective uniform, the scene is now like the trademark interrogation atmosphere)
[Loud: I HOPE WE DON'T SEE DENNIS FRANZ'S BUTT.]
Kellner: You're making fools of yourselves, but when that's new?
[Charity: Last week.]
Yakko: We'll let your answers be the announcer of that. Speaking of that, what do you know about Abyss?
[Charity: (Kellner) Well, it is a crappy movie. Why?]
Kellner: (Nervous) Him?
[Pule: Not Him! Abyss, stupid!]
naa, well he was a boss of Marvel Vs. Capcom 2 of his 3 forms! I'm certainly glad he's not around today to take his advantage.
[Loud: OF WHAT? WE DO NOT KNOW.]
Yakko: Then prepare to be unhappy.
[Toast: Not like Charity Bazaar.]
[Charity: Thanks.]
how do you explain the fact that all of us were visited yesterday by
[Loud: 3 GHOSTS.]
someone who looked and sounded exactly like him and is probably Mr. Abyss himself?!
Kellner: Well, they were showing the intro Mr. Yakko Warner,
[Pule: (Yakko) Never called me mister!]
they seen him when is says "3 fighters vs. Abyss" on it.
Yakko: That's funny,
[Charity: No, it isn't.]
I don't recall seeing Abyss with his poweful moves like he showed to these people yesterday.
Kellner: It must be a new Capcom video game technique,
[Toast: Since when, dude?!]
you know they come up with so many new revolutionary special FX.
[Loud: FOX X-MEN.]
Did you know that.
Yakko: (Upset) Did you know that you're lying? You don't know what we can do to you to make you talk.
Kellner: (Laughs) You actually think I, your old boss, don't know what you can do to me? Tee hee hee,
[Charity: They are ticking him with a feather.]
go ahead, I know all your tricks, I can't be fooled by any of your gags,
[Toast: Try gagging him instead.]
nor can I be fooled by Bugs' wit, Slappy's explosion, Speedy's speed, Loud's yelling, Fifi's smell, or Freakazoid with that whooshing sound, because I know them all!
[Pule: Was he really paying that much attention to us?]
[Loud: I GUESS.]
(The ones Kellner mentioned groan because they were just about to try those gags)
Slappy: Geez, did the whole world get smarter overnight?
Billie: Trust me and Eggy,
[Pule: Who's Eggy?]
[Charity: The Brain, Pule.]
that question isn't workable.
Gogo: You said it.
Axel: Step aside you crazy Toons
[Loud: (Axel) MR. MOTHER(BLEEP)ER IS HERE!]
I'll handle this.
(Then the lights go back on)
Axel: (To Kellner) You know, as a network boss you
[Toast: Deserve to die, dude!]
see a lot of *** awful movie scripts,
[Charity: Like the script to this movie.]
but as the one that has to work from them, I know more so how awful they are. Let me show you some of the terrible scripts I had to work with, so check them out.
[Toast: If you dare, dude.]
(He pulls out several scripts)
Kellner: (Gasps in shock) Beverly Hills Cop 2 & 3?!
[Pule: So Axel's movies are parodies of Police Academy?]
Another 48 Hours?!
[Loud: UNTIL THIS MOVIE IS OVER?!]
[All: (fearfully) No!]
Metro?! Holy Man?!
[Charity: Batman!]
(He gasps again) No, not the Golden Child Too!
[Charity: (Kellner) And I just bought him!]
Axel: That's right, read all my trashy movies,
[Pule: (Axel) And then (bleep) them!]
and I have lots more awful ones from another dang studios that I won't have to show if you talk.
Hamton: Better not be all that pork!
[Loud: THAT WAS A STUPID PARODY, IF YOU ASK ME.]
[Toast: No one has, dude.]
Kellner: Get those things away from me!
[Toast: Zip up your pants, dude!]
Axel: Not before you read a script that your own company approved, for some reason they thought it'd be a good movie, but now read what turned into the big ol' movie of the new millenium! (He pulls out another script)
[Loud: (Kellner) IT'S THE SCRIPT TO THIS MOVIE, NOOOO!!]
Kellner: B-Battlefield: Earth?! No, stop,
[Toast: In the name of love!]
anything but that!! Okay, I confess, I'm guilty,
[Charity: Of being in this movie.]
just no more awful scripts! We were planning to bring back something that would make sure you people didn't interfere with our coupons, and Abyss turned out to be it!
[Pule: One of those people who interfere with their coupons? Yeah, I believed it.]
Now he's coming to snatch the Jelly away from those kids because I told you about it! (He cries)
Babs: For someone like you, it would almost be a logical reason. But why didn't you tell us in secret so Abyss wouldn't know?
Kellner: He has the entire lot bugged so he'd know everything I told you,
[Loud: HOLD ON! NOW I KNOW THIS DIRECTOR IS STEALING SOME LINES FROM TOONS AND DOOM!]
[Toast: Plus, where did it say that Abyss bugged the whole lot?!]
[Charity: That is totally stupid, believe me.]
[Pule: Yeah again.]
he's adapted to technology well. And he's probably on his way to interview us with all that coupons.
(Just then, a knock on Kellner's door is heard)
[Charity: It's the pizza. I'll pay.]
Kellner: All right, who's there? If it's him, please
[Toast: Kill him.]
be nice to Abyss will ya.
Mr. Director: Hoyle, not him!
[Pule: Not Adam Sandler, no!]
Buster: Quick, cover your ears so you can't hear it!
(They all do, except for Kellner. but it's no good
[Pule: Neither is this movie.]
since the pounding is loud)
[Loud: NO I'M NOT.]
[Charity: What?]
[Loud: NOT THE POUNDING.]
[Charity: Oh.]
Tweety: Wuckly I can stop hearing that by fwing away! So wong!
[Charity: Tweety must have gotten acting lessons from Dan Quayle.]
(He starts to fly out the window but can still hear the pounding and he comes back) Wats, it's twue, no one can wesist that pounding!
[Toast: Except Dick Birchum.]
Abyss: (V.O.) OPEN THE DARN DOOR KELLNER!!
[Toast: (Abyss) This is the police! You're under arrest for being in this movie longer!]
Rita: No, stay back whoever you are!
(Then Kellner opens the door then Abyss walks in Kellner's office. Everyone except Daffy screamed)
[Charity: Daffy shouldn't screamed. He is used to this by now.]
Porky: oh m-m-my!
[Loud: HE MADE HIM WET HIMSELF!]
Abyss: That's Right, scream all you want!
Lola: If I were you, you never want to go through those Jelly orders. (To Babs) And try to spin into some character thingies again.
Babs: O.K. Lola.
[Pule: Babsy likes to take orders from her new role model.]
Lola: Ahh, remember these nerdluck character try to take over the toon.
[Charity: Actually, they try to enslave them and take them to Moron Mountain.]
[Toast: Dude, that movie wasn't that bad, was it?]
[Loud: NOPE. NOT TO JUSSONIC ANYWAY.]
Abyss: You're right. And do me a favor,
[Loud: SHAVE.]
can you get Roger Rabbit, Jessica Rabbit, & Baby Herman to me,
[Toast: Dude, why would he want them for?]
[Pule: Beats me.]
and a man who defeated me in Capcom Video Game. His name is Justin Lawson.
[Pule: Now he didn't even beat him yet! For crying out loud!]
Tweety: Who's Justin?
Abyss: Never mind, just bring him here understand.
[Loud: YOU SAID NEVER MIND! MAKE UP YOUR MIND, WILL YA?!]
Kellner: Yes sir.
Bugs: You can count on us.
Abyss: Well, I gotta have more meetings to do so take care.
(He leaves and chuckling)
[Pule: He shoulda stay more often.]
Charity: Well somebody's happy!
[Loud: THAT'S THE FIRST TIME SHE SAID THAT IN YEARS.]
[Charity: Amazing, huh?]
Steph: It's true! (She cries)
[Charity: (Steph) Our show did got canceled.]
Freakazoid: Don't cry Steph, we'll make sure that we can meet Roger, Jessica, and Herman.
Cosgrove: O.K. (To Kellner) We better get going now Jamie.
[Toast: I thought he hated him.]
Kellner: Wait, before you go,
[Pule: (Kellner) Pull my finger.]
you'll need Plotz.
Harry: Say what?
Kellner: Mr. Plotz needs you.
[Pule: Yuck! No thanks!]
Plotz: (Comes in by opening the door) Why do I have to do this,
[Loud: BECAUSE YOU ARE MORE STUPID THAN ANYONE ELSE.]
can't you send Melman or Allen instead?
Kellner: No Plotz,
[Charity: That is what this movie is missing.]
[Pule: But he's in this movie, isn't he?]
[Charity: I mean no plot.]
[Pule: Oh.]
Allen or Melman are too busy
[Toast: Smoking, dude.]
interviewing the Game Show Masters.
[Toast: Wait, hold the phone. What Game Show Masters? When did they get into this???]
[Loud: (moaning) I HAVE NO IDEA.]
You'll go with them to Meet Roger, Jessica, and Baby Herman. And you will send Justin down here.
[Loud: (Kellner) OR DIE!]
Plotz: Are you sure?
[Pule: (Kellner) No! Ha ha ha ha ha!]
Kellner: Yes.
Plotz: (To the Toons) All right, let's go meet the rabbits
[Charity: George.]
and their baby.
[Charity: They actually did it?]
[Pule: Eew!]
And we'll send the human down. So are you with me?
[All: No.]
Everyone: YES!
[Loud: NOW!]
Plotz: Kellner, we'll be back.
(Outside the lot a little later on the group is waiting for them)
Charity: Did we give them the right directions on how to get here, because otherwise I don't know why they haven't arrived yet.
[Toast: Dude, they been there before. How hard do they have to look?!]
Freakazoid: Don't worry Charity, they should be any minute now.
Voice 1: (V.O. from Above) How right you are!
[Pule: Pilgrim.]
In fact, look up and see what kind of entrance I hastly thought up!
Voice 2: (V.O. from Above) Me too!
(They look up in the air,
[Loud: NO SUPERMAN REFERENCES YOU GUYS.]
then see a trampoline has fallen onto the ground.
[Pule: We are being invited by mutant clowns!]
Then they see a plane flying above them, and then see something falling out.
[Charity: The post office is trying something new for once.]
That something turns out to be Roger Rabbit and Baby Herman (Voiced by Corey Burton), Screaming uncontrollably as they fall above the trampoline,
[Toast: Dudes, they are always doing that. We don't know why.]
but then they land on it to make a dignified jump onto the ground)
Roger: Ta-da!
[Loud: GREAT! NOW LEAVE...THROUGH THE BACK.]
Baby Herman: Phew! what a landing!
Roger: You said it.
[Charity: (Herman) That is right, I said it. I am the only star of this movie. I can take out all these toons if I wanna to. I am that powerful. Disperse!]
Bugs: Hello Roger and Herman, we're all happy to see that you got here again.
Roger: No problem, as you can see that Judge Doom is gone,
[Toast: At least he won't be in this.]
[Pule: Yeah. No good villain would be caught dead--literally--in this.]
we can feel peaceful.
Bugs: Cool.
Roger: Now Baby Herman, say hello to these folks.
]Pule: (Herman) Let me try. Get bent. No, I guess I can't.]
Baby Helman: Hello.
Everyone: Hello.
[Pule: Now you guys can stop being parrots now.]
Baby Herman: O.K., any questions?
(Hamton raises his hand)
Baby Herman: Yes Hamton?
[Toast: (Hamton) Where's the food?!]
Hamton: Your role is good.
Baby Herman: Thanks, anything else?
[Charity: (raising her hand) Yeah, like why this film is so bad?]
(Plucky raises his hand)
Baby Herman: Yes Plucky?
[Loud: (Plucky) WAIT, NO. I JUST HAVE TO STRETCH.]
Plucky: Where exactly is Roger's wife?
[Toast: She's dead.]
Baby Herman: Good question. (To Roger) Can you get Jessica here to meet with these folks.
Roger: Yes Baby.
Babs: Well, I guess it's time
[Loud: FOR THIS MOVIE TO END! PLEASE!]
for our usual annoyed reactions to their chauvinistic behavior.
Dot: I'm getting tired of that,
[Pule: (Dot) And this movie.]
let's just read magazines while they go nuts so we can't pay attention to them and get annoyed.
[Charity: We are already annoyed because of this.]
Shirley: Like that's a good idea, and it's so different from the usual formula, or some junk.
[Charity: Nothing is better than some junk.]
(Steph giggles)
Roger: Well, since you probably won't be satisfied until she does get here,
[Pule: (Roger) We will entertain for you.]
I may as well get it over with. Jessica, could you come and meet our friends now?
Baby Herman: Yeah.
Sultry Voice: All right Boys, we may as well get it out of the way now than later.
[Toast: Dude, who do they got in there? World's Oldest Woman?]
(Jessica Rabbit then walks in in her usual seductive way. While all the girls are reading magazines like Dot said and don't pay attention to her, all the men go nuts)
[Loud: HA! NICE TRY! I DIDN'T REALLY DO THAT BECAUSE I AM STRUCK WITH CHARITY.]
[Charity: Yeah, no need to try to break us up, Justin.]
[Toast: But you were doing the same thing, Charity. Only to Justin.]
[Charity: That was so pointless.]
[Pule: Ditto.]
Baby Herman: Jessica, I missed you!
[Loud: OH YEAH, I CAN SEE WHY.]
[Pule: Eew!]
[Charity: Loud, don't.]
[Loud: OKAY.]
Jessica: I missed you too, Baby Herman.
[Toast: But not in that way, I hope.]
Roger: And as always, that's exactly why I haven't made up for your lack of anger by creating my own over this.
Freakazoid: Hello, Ms. Rabbit.
[Charity: Geez, he is Freak-a-outta-control.]
Jessica: And you are?
Freakazoid: Freakazoid.
Jessica: Yeah, you're the blue guy with underwear who rescues the city.
[Pule: (Freakazoid sarcastic) No, I like to run around in my undies and scared little children, you doorknob.]
Freakazoid: That's me.
Cosgrove: Hey Freakazoid,
[Loud: YOUR WIFE JUST CALLED!]
tell these girls that they are not reading Playboy Magazines.
Freakazoid: Okay.
[Charity: No wonder I remembered seeing a page of Loud naked.]
[Loud: (embarrassed) Oops. How embarrasing.]
[Pule: How did you get in that issue, Loud?]
[Loud: I was paid to do it. I'm sorry.]
[Charity: That's okay. (playfully) I enjoyed seeing you naked.]
[Loud: (embarrassed again) Oy vey.]
As Freakazoid walks in to the girls are Playboy Magazines, he stopped)
Freakazoid: Excuse me, girls, you shouldn't be reading Playboy Magazines.
Girls: Sorry.
[Toast: Read Wizard magazines instead.]
Brain: I was afraid of that.
[Pule: Playboy magazines? Yeah. I can imagine why.]
[Toast: Dude, you didn't read a Playboy before.]
[Pule: No, but R6 told me what was in it once.]
[Toast: Dude, like sick-age.]
[Pule: I know.]
Now, as happy as we are that you three are here,
[Pule: We don't need you for this!]
you're only 1/2 of what he wants.
Roger: Oh, you're talking about Eddie!
Brain: No,
[Charity: Good, because he didn't want to be involved in any more time-travelling.]
[Loud: OR THIS CRAPPER OF A FILM.]
we already got him down that the last time we faced Doom while ago.
Roger: Oh yeah, now you're talking!
[Toast: Dude, that couldn't be Roger. He doesn't sound right, dude.]
Baby Herman: So, how are we gonna find a warp hole.
[Loud: HAVE YOU DO IT.]
Pinky: Ask Mr. Plotz, poit.
Hamton: I wonder where Elmyra went?
[Toast: Who cares, dude?]
Brain: Don't worry, she'll find us.
[Charity: And then, we'll kill her.]
Jessica: Is Judge Doom still around?
Freakazoid: No.
Jessica: Then who?
[Pule: Someone who named is Wu, that's who!]
Freakazoid: His name is Abyss, and he's back
[Loud: HE'S BACK FROM THE FUTURE.]
Marvel Vs. Capcom 2.
Jessica: Abyss, Hhhmmmmmmm.
[Charity: Does she always have to make sounds like that?]
Roddy: Listen up gang,
[Toast: (Roddy) My tummy rumblin'.]
Mr. Plotz will get Justin Down here
[Pule: And hopefully not make the same mistake as Brain Guy on MST3K.]
so we could battle him,
[Pule: They want to kick the crap out of the director?]
[Toast: Dude, I hope so.]
and we will send coupons of Jelly to those kids.
Rogers: Coupons, why didn't you say so!
[Loud: HE DID SAY SO!]
Roddy: O.K. then, Plotz, can we go and find the warp hole.
[Toast: (Plotz) No.]
Plotz: O.K. Mr. Macstew, if you say so.
Lola: All right, and let's move out.
[Charity: Of this studio and into a better one.]
(The group leaves to go in the station to find a warp hole, and now we see Elmyra still looking around the lot)
Elmyra: Tee hee hee, this game of hide and seek is fun, mousies!
[Toast: Dudes, I don't know why, but I hoped they killed her off and keep her killed.]
It'll be even more fun once I finally find you and take you back home, though I haven't heard you since we begin this game.
[Loud: OR THIS MOVIE.]
Oh well, it'll be well worth the wait!
(We see Abyss seeing the group)
Abyss: Yes, excellent. Go send Justin down Toons.
[Pule: (Abyss though he sounds like Peter Lorre) Yes, yes. That's it. Ha ha ha ha.]
(We cut to Abyss' castle where Dodgers Stadium used to be)
[Charity: And that's bad, why?]
Abyss: Ahhh, this is the life. Will somebody come up to me.
[Charity: He must mean the script writer.]
(Then Dr. Laura comes in)
[Pule: Whoop-dee-doo. Everyone's favorite annoying doctor is here.]
Dr. Laura: You called.
Abyss: I got the Toons under my spell.
[Loud: ALREADY?! WE HAVEN'T BEEN THROUGH HALF THE FILM, AND THAT JERK BRAINWASH US ALREADY?!]
[Toast: Dude, terrible timing.]
Dr. Laura: Affirmative sir.
Abyss: Good, now send them here.
Dr. Laura: Yes sir.
(The Toons are hypnotized by Abyss are as follows: From F! Lobe. From PatB! Snowball. From A! Walter, Sid, and Beany (Who voiced by Bob Joles). From TTA! Foxy, Roxy, (Who voiced by Grey Delisle), and Goopy (Who voiced by Roger Jackson).
[Toast: Which was easy considering that they were already evil to begin with!]
[Charity: And what about the plot with Allen and the TTA guest-stars?! That hasn't been resolved yet!]
[Pule: Those idiots looks like they put a bunch of movies in a bender and push the mixie button.]
Lobe: Hello.
Abyss: It's good to see you that you got here.
Sid the Squid: It's been a pleasure sir.
Walter Wolf: I agree.
Dr. Laura: Good, but when the Toons get here, make sure
[Loud: THEY GET THEIR RAFFLE TICKETS.]
that he can send them to the castle.
Snowball: Yes ma'am.
Lobe: You can count on him.
Abyss: (Chuckling) Well, I gonna talk to the FCC Agents right now.
[Toast: Oh, he means the losers.]
Roxy: How will you do that?
Abyss: Trust me, Roxy.
[Charity: Now he stole a line from Indiana Jones.]
I gotta have some private conversation.
[Pule: (Abyss) For your inevitable murder!]
Roxy: Well O.K.
Abyss: Gotta talk to you later. (He leaves)
Lobe: Well Dr. Laura,
[Loud: (Dr. Laura) I AM NOT DATING YOU. SO FORGET YOU, YOU BRAINY FREAK!]
he will send the Toons right here to fall in our trap.
Dr. Laura: Good, now onto Plan A.
[Charity: Which they don't have.]
(Then, The FCC Agents are in the front door as Abyss approches)
FCC Agent 1: You called sir.
[Toast: (Abyss) No, I called you, dorkheads!]
Abyss: I believe I do.
FCC Agent 2: Well, you must the villan in 3 forms of you.
Abyss: Well, yeah. Something like that.
Agent 1: What brings you here sir.
Abyss: These friends are under my spell.
[Pule: (Agent 2) That's it? I thought you needed our help or something.]
Come on out guys.
[All: No!]
(Then we see his friends are revealed as Burger Students
[Pule: He musta got them out of Burger King.]
as follows: Tina ****s, Jim Rhodes,
[Toast: Dude, wasn't he War Machine?]
[Charity: I think so.]
Jeremy Flathers, Brian Kilteyka,
[Loud: NO THANKS. I DON'T DRINK.]
Jason Phelps, Joe Aynes, Jeff Dombrowski, David Maher, and Emeka Uduma.)
[Charity: Who aren't in this film.]
Abyss: Hello, Tina, Jim, Jeremy, Brian, Jason, Joe, Jeff David, and what's your name?
[Toast: (Emeka) Uh, it's Milhouse. I think.]
Emeka Uduma: I'm Emeka.
Abyss: Emeka, right.
Agent 2: So, what brings you guy here?
[Loud: ABYSS. DUH.]
Jim Rhodes: We will destroy Justin, once and for all.
Brian Kilteyka: We are the villany of Toons, well we're Human Characters.
[Pule: Who shoulda have better lives than this film.]
Jeremy Flathers: Oooohhh! nice horns you got.
Abyss: These aren't the horns Jeremy.
[Charity: Those are his private areas.]
Tina ****s: We send these creatures, that the Toons are gonna ambush our castle, if they approched it.
Joe Aynes: What kind of creatures?
[Charity: Elvis impersonators.]
Tina: Don't ask.
Jeff Dombrowski: How are we gonna do that?
Agent 1: You'll see.
[Toast: Thank you, Ben Stein.]
Jason Phelps: You and me both Agents.
Abyss: Excellent, not get to work.
[Pule: (Jason) Woohoo! Time off!]
Burger Students: Yes sir.
[Loud: AND THEY IMMEDIATELY FORGET WHAT THEY WERE DOING.]
(Inside the lab, the Toons found the warp hole)
[Loud: NO WONDER THIS FILM STUNKS. HERE IS A BIG PLOT HOLE.]
Plotz: Well, we found it gang!
[Pule: What? My lunch?]
Runt: Found what?
Plotz: The Black Hole.
[Charity: Dennis Rodman.]
Runt: Oh.
Plotz: Stand back everybody,
[Toast: Dude, he is going to strip!]
[All: (screaming)]
I'm gonna open up the warp hole.
(Then Plotz opens up the warp hole,
[Loud: AND THEY ALL DIE. THE END.]
the Toons are sounding exciting.
[Charity: Except us, that is.]
We now fade to the real world where Justin and Mike Cutler are in the front parking lot)
Mike Cutler: I gotta tell you Justin,
[Toast: (Mike) I need a better life than this film.]
you're way off!
Justin: You've gotta be kidding me.
Mike Cutler: No, I'm serious.
[Pule: We gotta split.]
(Everyone got up to leave the theater. The movie resumes as they do.)
(Then, the warp hole opens up)
Mike Cutler: What's that?
(Commercial)