Favourite Witty Lines?

[D-Mono]

What are some of your favourite witty lines from TAS, TNBA and Superman?
I recently just got a handful of episodes of Superman, and burst out laughing in both "Knight Time" and "In Brightest Day...".

Brainiac - (To Batman): "You are every bit the detective that your followers on the Internet would believe."

Green Lantern - "Hey! Don't you want to talk first? You know, banter back and forth to show me your inate superiority."
Sinestro - "No."

So, did any lines tickle your ribs? :)
D-Mono.

[Bird Boy]

"Untie me you little...UNTIE ME!" -Batman to Robin in the TNBA episode "Never Fear" (I think that's the name)

"Puddin'..don't ya want a taste of my pie?"-Harley to Joker in "Beware the Creeper".

Those are the only ones I can think of right now..:)

-BB

[Russkafin]

From Mad Love...

Harley: "Then I figured, hang the victim, that's you, upsidedown, so that their little frowns look like little smiles! CLEVER??"

Batman: "Brilliant."

[Karkull]

From Bizzaro World:

Superman: "You'll kill millions of people!"

Bizzaro: "That how Krypton end!"

Superman: "But this isn't Krypton!"

Bizzaro: "Me make it Krypton! Now, Krypton explode!"



From The Hand of Fate:

Karkull: "Careful, it could be someone you know."

[Nass]

Was when Robin saved Batman on BTAS and Bats didn't say anything so Robin mocks him with "Gee Robin, thanks for saving my bacon. No problemo Batman! Anytime!" Thats the greatest line ever....well to me. hehe.

[DisneyBoy]

That episode was Night of the Ninja, I believe. I liked that one too. As for me, the only lines that come to mind are from Batman Returns. Batman and Catwoman are fighting and he knocks he to the ground saying "Eat floor-high fiber"! Ok, it's corny, but when I first heard it it just sounded so funny! I also loved a line between Selina and Bruce while they're dancing near the end of the film. I never heard it on TV before because NBC deleted it or turned down their voices. Bruce apologises for having run out on her the night before (to become Batman) and she says she doesn't mind because she had to go feed her cats (become Catwoman). He then asks "So, no hard feelings?" She grins, slyly and whispers seductively, "...Semi-Hard...":D

[Trent Lane]

"Over The Edge", from the "Johnny Cochran-esque" lawyer:
"If the Bats on a spree, Wayne must pay the fee!"

[optimal321]

Man, all those are great lines. Here's some more:

Batman He trashed my car, Alfred. Between a couple of guys that's real personal.

-----

Alfred So that wasn't you tossing security guards out of windows, sir?

Batman No Alfred, i only toss butlers.

-----

Robin Another fine villain made possible by a grant from the Wayne Foundation.

-----

Joker Harr! Try me famous Joker fish! There's Smilin' Smelt, Gigglin' Groupe, and Happy Haddock!

Alfred This could cause a stampede to pork.

-----

That's all i can think of right now. Be back later if i come up w/ some more:D

[The Mad Hatter]

Can't forget this gem from Mask of the Phantasm:

(Alfred turns off a TV report suggesting that Batman has gone nuts)

Alfred: (to Bruce) Such rot, sir. Why, you're as sane as the next fellow. Incidentally, I pressed your tights and put away your exploding gas balls.

[Joker85]

From the epp Harlequinade

Robin:What was she before she went bonkers??
Batman: A clinical psychiatrist
Robin: Figures
:)

[Joe Tully]

This one from Almost Got 'Im, most of you probably remember it.

JOKER: Gee, that's too bad, Harv, but I guess you'll always come in second. Anybody else want to go?

CROC: Me! There I was, holed up in this quarry when Batman came nosing around. He was getting closer. . . Closer. . .

IVY: And--?

CROC: I threw a rock at him!

THERE IS DEAD SILENCE.

IVY: So, Harvey, when became of the giant penny?

CROC: It was a big rock. . .

TWO-FACE: They actually let him keep it!

[Maxie Zeus]

"The Laughing Fish"

Batman stands over a joker-fish. Alfred looks over his shoulder. Batman waits for the quip he knows is coming.

Alfred: "Dining in tonight?"

Batman (not waiting for Alfred to finish): "The dissecting tray, Alfred."

[DR. BELCH]

--came in a Superman episode...the debut of Volcana. She is speaking to her fence on the phone after robbing the nautical museum. She blows into a whistle and says that it was "touched by the President's lips". "What wasn't?" he comes back with.
I exploded laughing. This was released at the height of the Lewinsky scandal, about the time we learned of her little trick with a cigar that would make Freud blanch.

[kid_flash]

A few of my faves...

"Beumont? Not the babe!"
-Joker, Mask of the Phantasm

"Hey! Do I hit your kids? Oh wait, guess I do...heh!"
-Joker, Old Wounds

Robin: "Which way did he go?"
Big explosion
Batman: "That way."
-Beware the Creeper

Harley Quinn lies in some rubble, Creeper grabs her arm and kisses it.
Creeper: "Awwww....sweety gotta boo-boo?"
WHAM! Harley hits Creeper with a mallot.
Harley: "Awwww....Creep-o gotta concussion?"
-Beware the Creeper

[Nightwing]

"You Scratch My Back"

Batgirl: "You're the one who raised him...."


"Mask of The Phantasm"

Joker....Ah, I can't remember it right now cuz I wanna just keep churning em out, but it was the phone call to Andrea Beumont from Joker, to jokingly letting her know a bomb was on the way (but Batman was the only one there).


"The Strange Secret of Bruce Wayne"

Joker: "Boy did YOU get the wrong number! Leave a message at the sound of the shriek! -No...no! Yaaaaaahhh!!"

Joker: "Remember! It's not the fall....it's the sudden stop!"

[kid_flash]

This is an example of my extreme geekiness, but here's that line you couldn't remember, Nightwing:

Joker: "Listen, boobsie, even though you never call and never write, I've still got a soft spot for you. So I'm sending you a gift...air mail!"

[Squall]

Two from "The Call":
--------------------------------------

Superman is chasing Batman [Beyond] in the Batmobile. Terry: "So, how fast can this thing go?"

Bruce: "Mach 3."

Terry: "Is that faster than a speeding bullet?"

---------------------------------------

Terry: "...and now those starfish things are everywhere down there! What do we do?"

Bruce: "All I can do is have Barbara contact the military."

Terry: "But they'll bomb the place!"

Bruce: "That's their job."

---------------------------------------
Two from "World's Finest":
---------------------------------------

Superman crashes in through the roof of the Lexcorp factory to save Lois Lane from Joker. Joker: "As powerful as a locomotive... and just about as subtle."

----------------------------------------

Batman flies to Hobbs Bay in Metropolis to take on the Joker. As he lands in his jetpack, Joker says, "What's the matter, Bat-boy? Suffering from propulsion envy?"

----------------------------------------

[Karkull]

From World's Finest:

Joker [to Lex Luthor]--"Oh, you'll be Mister Clean, I promise."
Joker--"See that he's street pizza! In this town some flying fool could have caught him!"
Lois Lane--"I'll leave you alone so you can count sheep, or whatever you Kansas boys dream about."

From Action Figures:

Metallo--"Miss Lane, please, such cliches. How did you ever win that Pulitzer?"

From Monkey Fun:

Lois Lane--"Now shut up and keep squeezing monkeys!"

From Double Dose:

Livewire [after seeing Superman coated in rubber]--"Oh, look, the boy scout brought protection."