uber-pissed: Warning, relationship stuff.

[JustJack]

O.k, I broke up with my then-girlfriend 2 months ago. We remained friends, and about 2 weeks ago we started flirting a little, then a lot....

Well, last weekend was a...uhm..."make-out-fest" for us. :D heh. Anyway, last weekend was one to remember, and even though we didn't talk about it, in my mind there was no need to question about whether or not we were back together. I'm sorry, but from where I come from, when you kiss someone like that, and are around them all-dayfor 3 days straight...you're back together. So, she had school, and I had work for a few days, and when we saw eachother again..she kinda ignored me. I was uber-pissed...but mostly confused. I GUESS I got the wrong impression from last weekend?

So, she calls me today, during lunch, I didn't sound to happy to hear from her(naturally). She asks what's wrong, so I ask "what are we?" She starts yelling at me(YELLING) about how we still need to talk about a lot of stuff before we ever concider getting back together. I tell her "but we did talk...Friday?" Then I ask her what last weekend was all about. Was she just using me?
A lot of yelling from her later, she hangs up the phone. I didn't yell, nor give her a reason to yell, I just calmly asked "What was last weekend? And...we're still just friends?" I personally think she yelled at me because she didn't know how to answer, and she now realizes she messed up.

Anyway, here's the beef of the situation which plays in my favor.

1.) While we were 'flirting', we talked a little about getting back together, and we both agreed there were things we needed to talk about. "Some things need to change"...and we both agreed. So, last Friday(the beginning of our "weekend of love"....), we did talk about it, a little(for about 10 minutes... :rolleyes: ), and she said her ONLY concern was that I have a lot of things like work and now, college to worry about. I explained to her that work and college are my "work and school life", but I still do have a personal life, and I want her to be right there. Happily she hugged and kissed me. So, her saying that we still have a lot more to talk about is a load of crap, because she originally told me her "only" concern, and that was "solved"....

2.) If she ever approached me "that way", I was simply going in to give, what I thought was going to be just a hug. SHE was the one who ended up kissing me. If I sat down, she'd be the one who jumped in my lap. And it was entirely her who made all the moves...I just happily accepted all the moves.

Anyway. before she hung up the phone, she said "when you want to work things out, YOU call ME"...which is kinda dumb..it being her fault, she needs to be the one who wants to work things out. Anyway...now, I don't really think I want to work things out. I feel used, and uber-pissed. There are many other, and better fish out in the sea. Not to mention 3 or 4 who I know like me, and in the past 2 months have tried "everything"....hmm...oh well. Tonight, I think I'll just take in "Ninja Scroll", and NOT call. It's here problem, she can solve it.

[Weatherman]

Feel better now? :p



Well, all things considered, it sounds she doesn't know what she wants, and it may be time to just end it completely. Move on with your lives, as you said, there are a few other girls who seem interested in you. Best of luck to ya. :)

[TimTwoFace]

Man, that's kinda like what I went through at New Year's this year. See, there was a girl I knew for 18 months that I was growing increasingly close to over that period of time...then on New Year's, well, put bluntly, we did everything *AHEM* and I thought that was a GOOD thing. Nothing was rushed into, and I felt super comfortable around her in virtually every regard.

One week later she broke it off entirely. Why exactly is still beyond me to this day - and I was really upset. I mean, I had incredibly strong feelings for her ALL that time, and I THOUGHT she had the same for me. Maybe that's the case, but she broke it off regardless, and I was hurt for months afterwards, cuz I know I did nothing wrong. I didn't recieve an explaination at all, just a "don't call me, I can't handle your affection right now" response.

What do I suggest? As tough as it may be, especially considering the past and what may have been, leave her in your past and move on. I've managed to do that, myself - it's no fun, and I still think of her fondly in what once was, but it's not fair to have your emotions toyed with like that. Move on and forget her.

-Tim

[Chris Sanders MSX]

Me being me, I'd just cave in and call her up. I'd ask her to meet me at my house, because it's much easier to deak with things of this nature face to face. And then calmly ask her "What more do we have to work out ?"

Then the floor would be left open for her to explain what she was talking about. And take it from there... Don't give up unless you really think that other than this incident she's been using you. Beacuse I think she's just confused or feeling guilty about something.

[JustJack]

hahaha, just a minute ago, I got on to read these responses when she called me(it's only 4:48, she doesn't get home till 3...anyway). She said she read the e-mail I sent her, and I simply told her to answer all my questions, and finally...why the hell she yelled at me on the phone. She explained everything, and I sort of left it at "Don't worry about it, now get back to your homework..."

My eye's were fixed in the ' :rolleyes: ' possition the entire time.

So, everything was "worked out", but now she's afraid she'll lose me. She wants to be "official"...but she didn't even know why she did what she did :rolleyes: . Anyway...on one hand I'm thinking I should cave in and be with her...but on the other hand...there are probably better girls out there who can treat me better. I have never yelled at her, she yells at me constantly, and if I ever even spoke "sternly", she'd cry about how I yell at her. Uhg.. :rolleyes:

decisions decisions...

[Chris Sanders MSX]

Heh.. Sounds like my mom and dad, my mother usually does all the yelling. My dad is usually calm and then when my dad says anything sternly that my mom doesn't like she fly's off the handle. I consider my mom very irrational, so based on that I wouldn't cave in.


But who knows your situation might be different,I'd give her a nother shot on sort of a trial basis and if she screws up, find someone who'll treat you the way you want to be treated.