Stereotypes about the overweight

[Shawn Hopkins]

Have you ever ran into or personally experienced any stereotypical attitudes about fat people? I think the main ones are that fat people are "jolly," that fat people are lazy, that fat people are always hungry and, most hurtful, that fat people are stupid. Of course fat people may be these things just as anyone else may be, but it's not a condition of being fat.

I'm overweight myself now, but I was skinny when I was a kid because we were so extremely poor we didn't have much food to eat. But I saw how the other kids picked on the fat kids and treated them as if they were dumb or worthless and that seemed miserable. I think if I had been fat in addition to my other social handicaps like poverty and shyness in school I might not have been able to take it.

As an adult I do sometimes notice discrimination against me as I am about 6 feet tall and about 240 pounds. A skinny or fit person can go without shaving or look a little messy and people just find them more attractive, but if you're fat your appearance has to be absolutely perfect or people think of you as a disgusting slob. Also, people just seem to be less likely to listen to fat people and their opinions than they do to attractive people. In business meetings a fat person can give an opinion or an idea and it will be ignored, but an attractive or fit person can come along later and repeat the same idea and be praised for it.

[sdp]

Well if you're overweight it means that you don't take care of your body, in a way its no different from someone who doesn't shower or whatnot. Now, I don't care whether people are fat or not, if they're happy then more power to them. It annoys me is when fat people complain about being fat, its not that hard to lose weight. I will only discriminate when someones fatness is actually affecting me, whether he is blocking the way, occupying more space than others when we all want to, grab all the egg rolls at a Chinese buffet etc :p Oh and of course if they are insulting me in some kind of way on my looks or whatever.

[Shawn Hopkins]

Well if you're overweight it means that you don't take care of your body, in a way its no different from someone who doesn't shower or whatnot. Now, I don't care whether people are fat or not, if they're happy then more power to them. It annoys me is when fat people complain about being fat, its not that hard to lose weight. I will only discriminate when someones fatness is actually affecting me, whether he is blocking the way, occupying more space than others when we all want to, grab all the egg rolls at a Chinese buffet etc :p Oh and of course if they are insulting me in some kind of way on my looks or whatever.

Well, thanks for providing us with some examples of insulting stereotypes to examine, at least.

If it were easy to lose weight don't you think more people would do it? For anyone over 21 whose metabolism has slowed down it's a slow, painful process that takes months of exercise and starving yourself.

[Matt Hazuda]

If it were easy to lose weight don't you think more people would do it? For anyone over 21 whose metabolism has slowed down it's a slow, painful process that takes months of exercise and starving yourself.If "starving" means "no more trough of food," then yes :p [stereotyping]

Seriously though, just cut back on portion sizes (get a medium fry instead of a large, or better, no fries) and eliminate crap like soda. Just doing that alone will shed off a few pounds. It's a matter of self-control, which fatties don't have (you see what I did there? :sweat: [stereotyping])

[GWOtaku]

The problem with the "fat person = undisciplined slob" thing is that the observer is ignorant. Yeah, I'm sure there are people that don't take care of themselves, but how do you know? Media has definitely conditioned certain attitudes about it. The fat friend who's always eating something and pitching in some cheap humor is pretty high up on the list of hackneyed cliches that badly need to die.

Ironically, I've known a couple of fellows that could be reasonably called "fat" that actually are among the very jolliest, happiest people I know. Go figure.

[Shawn Hopkins]

If "starving" means "no more trough of food," then yes :p

Seriously though, just cut back on portion sizes (get a medium fry instead of a large, or better, no fries) and eliminate crap like soda. Just doing that alone will shed off a few pounds. It's a matter of self-control, which fatties don't have (you see what I did there? :sweat:)

You're just being an ass. It's easy to say crap like that, harder to live it. Many fat folk eat normal portions, the trough of food thing is a stereotype.

[Baseball]

If it were easy to lose weight don't you think more people would do it? For anyone over 21 whose metabolism has slowed down it's a slow, painful process that takes months of exercise and starving yourself.
Yes, but what in life is easy? Despite what you've said, it only takes an hour of time in your day to work out. Three or four times a week, that's a solid plan. A lot of times people will make the excuse that they don't have the time, but it's more so reallocation. Instead of watching TV for an hour, go to the gym. Hell, you can knock it out before you have to go to work; showering there and going straight there afterward. There's also the fact that people can change their diets; knocking out junk food and fast food is the largest part. I've never seen stereotypes of fat people in real life iterating the idea that they're jolly or stupid. Even the "always hungry" category. But laziness can potentially be understandable.

The overweight have the power to change their situation, but so many just make excuses. It's hard for anyone overweight to lose those pounds, but having a slowed metabolism doesn't mean it's impossible. Obesity can represent a lack of self-control and over-consumption in the eyes of many, especially in the corporate world. When people lose that weight, they often look better (in the eyes of the media/masses, anyways) and feel better. That doesn't mean that the discrimination is based on weight though; it's quite a broad generalization to assume that people are less likely to listen to one because he's fat. Not only does personality go a long way, but also the ability to convey information and emotion effectively.

[Matt Hazuda]

You're just being an ass. It's easy to say crap like that, harder to live it.You asked for stereotypes and I gave as such and my advice is sound. If you don't have the self-control to stick to it, that's another problem.

Does it suck cause you think you're not getting all the food you want? Yes. Is it worth it in the long-run? Yes.

[Shawn Hopkins]

I see posting this was a mistake. Standard Toonzone sanctimonious dickery from people who have never been there or done that. Most of you guys on this board really have your heads so far up your asses you're starting to like the farty smell, you know that?

[Matt Hazuda]

I see posting this was a mistake. Standard Toonzone sanctimonious dickery from people who have never been there or done that.Except I was previously a little overweight and I've managed to pare myself down to something better, but not fully where I want to be yet. Don't make assumptions of others.

[Robin2099]

Uhm no it doesn't. It's all about changing how you eat, what you eat and exercising. The problem is that no one ever wants to actually show willpower and follow through with it. Every month when you pick up a Men's Health or Men's Fitness magazine and you'll see people who managed to loose 150-200 pounds not by "starving themselves"(which btw typically leads to overeating the next meal) but by doing exactly what I said above. All those things above are just excuses and reasons for people to give up because they don't want to follow through. Plain and simple. BTW I was also about thirty five pounds overweight because I quit taking care of myself. But I seriously decided that I wasn't happy with how I looked and I read up on fitness and nutrition and made the lifestyle changes I need to and I've dropped about fifteen pounds. Now my goal is to get a six pack. So needless to say, when people who are overweight use excuses about why they can't loose weight I don't buy it. Period. I'm also 27 so age isn't an excuse either.

[Shawn Hopkins]

Except I was previously a little overweight and I've managed to pare myself down to something better, but not fully where I want to be yet. Don't make assumptions of others.

A little is easy to lose, especially for a young person. What about a lot? Look, I know it can be done, but I resent the idea that it's easy. It's not easy, it's very difficult for many people.

[Matt Hazuda]

A little is easy to lose, especially for a young person. What about a lot? Look, I know it can be done, but I resent the idea that it's easy. It's not easy, it's very difficult for many people.No one ever said it was easy. Every bit will help though. Starving yourself is the stupidest thing you can do if you plan on losing weight. It's about moderating what you do eat (which means you can eat food you like, but just less of it).

[Desensitized]

Eh, I fluctuate. It's not really that hard for me to cut out junk and whatnot, it's not like I'm obsessed.

The only problem is that I live in the middle of nowhere and have little to no money, so my exercise options are limited. Especially in the winter. :p

Not to mention that I have no car and the nearest supermarket that carries any sort of health food is one town over. If I can move of this town, maybe I'll try a bit harder. Until then, I'm more or less fine with what I do.

[Shawn Hopkins]

Look, people, I know these things. I don't drink soda pop except on special occasions. I go to the bloody gym and work out when I can fit it into my schedule. I recently lost 40 pounds, over a period of about five months of intense exercise and diet, although I gained some of it back when I started eating again.

There's such a rush to lecture people on this board and assume they aren't living their lives right and that you are so high and mighty you can tell them what to do. That's not why I made the topic, I wanted to talk about how people often assume stereotypical things about the overweight. The idea that a person is fat because he's lazy or because he eats everything in sight ignorant as assuming a gay person is promiscuous or a black person is stupid. You don't know that person, you don't know why they're fat. But for some reason it's still socially acceptable to put people in categories because of their appearance in this case.

[Baseball]

I see posting this was a mistake. Standard Toonzone sanctimonious dickery from people who have never been there or done that. Most of you guys on this board really have your heads so far up your asses you're starting to like the farty smell, you know that?
You're just upset because you aren't hearing what you want to hear. Being overweight isn't a good thing, but it's not a permanent condition either. You can lose weight and change your diet and be a genuinely healthy person, but only if you want to.

It's hard for everyone, but just grit your teeth and bear it until you like it. Humans are made to love physical exercise. Once you get into the groove, endorphins are released in the brain to literally make us enjoy it. You can exercise anywhere too. In the country, go running. Instead of buying McDonalds for a month, save up that money and buy a pull-up bar. Do crunches and push-ups. You can do the same things in the city, or in a park.

[Matt Hazuda]

There's such a rush to lecture people on this board and assume they aren't living their lives right and that you are so high and mighty you can tell them what to do. That's not why I made the topic, I wanted to talk about how people often assume stereotypical things about the overweight.But you asked for stereotypes and then got rather upset when provided (I had to go back and label mine to clearly point them out even).

[Beat]

Having been overweight in high school and having lost close to 30 pounds when I took up boxing and jiu jitsu as hobbies, I can honestly say that I have little tolerance for those who complain about their weight but don't do anything, or worse, those proud of their weight. Obesity is not a lifestyle choice, it's a disease that negatively affects people and their lives. The body isn't meant to carry all that weight.

[Shawn Hopkins]

You're just upset because you aren't hearing what you want to hear. Being overweight isn't a good thing, but it's not a permanent condition either. You can lose weight and change your diet and be a genuinely healthy person, but only if you want to.

It's hard for everyone, but just grit your teeth and bear it until you like it. Humans are made to love physical exercise. Once you get into the groove, endorphins are released in the brain to literally make us enjoy it. You can exercise anywhere too. In the country, go running. Instead of buying McDonalds for a month, save up that money and buy a pull-up bar. Do crunches and push-ups. You can do the same things in the city, or in a park.


I don't want to hear that it's fine to be overweight. I know it's not healthy. I wanted to talk about how it is unfair to assume things about a person just by looking at their body, but many of you seem to be eager to make just those assumptions.

Matt, you weren't listing these to provide me with examples of stereotypes, you were making meanspirited jokes about fat people based on the idea that they are fat because they are too lazy to make the oh so minor changes that would make them skinny. You can't go back and cover that up now with some weak disclaimers.

[Matt Hazuda]

Matt, you weren't listing these to provide me with examples of stereotypes, you were making meanspirited jokes about fat people based on the idea that they are fat because they are too lazy to make the oh so minor changes that would make them skinny. You can't go back and cover that up now with some weak disclaimers.I should have used a better word than "fatties," but as far as stereotypes go, fat people lacking self-control and eating a lot are pretty standard.

[Baseball]

I don't want to hear that it's fine to be overweight. I know it's not healthy. I wanted to talk about how it is unfair to assume things about a person just by looking at their body, but many of you seem to be eager to make just those assumptions.
It definitely is unfair, but that's the case with all stereotypes. Black people can't walk into a supermarket without one person assuming that they're dangerous gangbangers. An Asian man can't flirt with foreign women without one of them assuming he's got a small penis. A woman is supposed to have maternal instincts, therefore, she cannot advance in the work force.

But being overweight isn't necessarily in the same category. Race and sex are permanent; obesity is not. It's a physical condition that can be changed, just like you can change from glasses to contacts. Or like a haircut. Granted, it's more difficult to change, but one can still do it. People who don't fit into that category have a hard time understanding as to why the obese aren't doing anything to change their situation. That's why they're seen as people without self-control; they're fat because they eat unhealthily. At the same time, a lack of ambition is also perceived; a fit person can't begin to understand why anyone would allow themselves to be fat. If you could be more attractive by losing weight, wouldn't you want to do it for self-improvement's sake?

Those are generalizations, though. As I said earlier, personality goes a long way. You can be charming and still weigh over 240. You can be ambitious and show it through your actions, dialogue, and mannerisms. You can be confident. Of course, one has to believe it's true as well.

[Shawn Hopkins]

It definitely is unfair, but that's the case with all stereotypes. Black people can't walk into a supermarket without one person assuming that they're dangerous gangbangers. An Asian man can't flirt with foreign women without one of them assuming he's got a small penis. A woman is supposed to have maternal instincts, therefore, she cannot advance in the work force.

But being overweight isn't necessarily in the same category. Race and sex are permanent; obesity is not. It's a physical condition that can be changed, just like you can change from glasses to contacts. Or like a haircut. Granted, it's more difficult to change, but one can still do it. People who don't fit into that category have a hard time understanding as to why the obese aren't doing anything to change their situation. That's why they're seen as people without self-control; they're fat because they eat unhealthily. At the same time, a lack of ambition is also perceived; a fit person can't begin to understand why anyone would allow themselves to be fat. If you could be more attractive by losing weight, wouldn't you want to do it for self-improvement's sake?

Those are generalizations, though. As I said earlier, personality goes a long way. You can be charming and still weigh over 240. You can be ambitious and show it through your actions, dialogue, and mannerisms. You can be confident. Of course, one has to believe it's true as well.

The only explanation I can think of for your constant, unwelcome Dear Abby act in this and other threads is that the smell of your own farts has damaged your brain. No one wants or needs your advice here. It's not even good advice, it's based on cliches, superficiality and the same stereotypes that I was talking about. You can't judge a person based on looking at their outer shell. You don't know them, you don't know where they have been, who they are or how they lived. That's the point here, but many of the people in this thread don't seem to get that.

[Baseball]

The only explanation I can think of for your constant, unwelcome Dear Abby act in this and other threads is that the smell of your own farts has damaged your brain. No one wants or needs your advice here. It's not even good advice, it's based on cliches, superficiality and the same stereotypes that I was talking about. You can't judge a person based on looking at their outer shell. You don't know them, you don't know where they have been, who they are or how they lived. That's the point here, but many of the people in this thread don't seem to get that.
Haha, I'm chiming in with the truth. The point of a message board is to state your own opinion, right? People are narcissistic and superficial and no matter what you say, someone is always going to judge you based on what you look like. As much as everyone would like for that to be false, it never will be. It's subconscious and happens pretty much in every layer of life. Among children, infants, even the animal kingdom. This phenomenon is present in literally every culture, and you're ignoring that fact.

You're lucky if you find a good group of people who love you for everything that you are. If you've found them, then don't worry so much about your weight. But if you're going to remain so concerned with what other people think, then I'll tell you straight up. None of that bull. No "nice."

[SilentBat18]

I read through these replies and i find myself a little confused... is the reason the tread was started because you want to know the reason for discrimination? Or reprimand people for making discriminations?

I mean, the reason people discriminate is because it started out as an innate behavior that has been going on since we became self aware. Yes, it's true that unfortunately those discriminations are negative, but its a part of life. Stereotypes exist because people pay more attention to the negative aspects and will generalize them. If seen frequent enough, they become a label. For example, fat people being lazy is a stereoptype because it has been seen frequent enough for it to be generalized. Of course, it is untrue in many cases, but its harder to believe that.

And please don't say my brain is damaged by farts... that's insulting.

[Desensitized]

And please don't say my brain is damaged by farts... that's insulting.So was the second post, but no one bothered to mention that. I imagine they were too busy smirking while writing their posts.

[Sparticus]

If it were easy to lose weight don't you think more people would do it? For anyone over 21 whose metabolism has slowed down it's a slow, painful process that takes months of exercise and starving yourself.

Bull. Crap. Exercise good. Starving. BAD. Starving is only ever a temporary solution, only idiots starve themselves (and said idiots can be a perfectly healthy weight to begin with, just so you know), and it's a temporary solution that will make it HARDER to loose weight in the future. If you starve yourself, it convinces your body that times are tough, so the next time you eat, it stores as much nutrition as it can. As fat.

You're better off simply eating well. Cut back on the sugar, meat and fried foods, eat lots of fruits and vegetables, and keep exercising. Cook your own meals, avoid fast food when you can and whatever you do, DO NOT OVEREAT. One slice of cake is fine, the whole cake? NO. Just no.

Also don't be afraid to play around with your overall diet. Sometimes cutting back on carbs works (not eliminating them completely mind you, just eating less of them), sometimes cutting back on dairy. It all depends.

Most diets are bullcrap, if you know a little about nutrition you know that eating a balanced diet and getting enough exercise is the best way to loose weight. Unless you have an underlying medical condition, there is NO REASON for you to stay that big. Sure, it can be slow going, but as long as you stick with it, you WILL loose the weight.

Where the stupid lazy fattie stereotype comes into play is when the person in question KNOWS all of this but doesn't have the willpower to do it. Which just leaves all of those little emotional problems that no one has the balls to deal with.

Suck it up and take better care of yourself. And quit trying to pick a fight.

[Shawn Hopkins]

Haha, I'm chiming in with the truth. The point of a message board is to state your own opinion, right? People are narcissistic and superficial and no matter what you say, someone is always going to judge you based on what you look like. As much as everyone would like for that to be false, it never will be. It's subconscious and happens pretty much in every layer of life. Among children, infants, even the animal kingdom. This phenomenon is present in literally every culture, and you're ignoring that fact.

You're lucky if you find a good group of people who love you for everything that you are. If you've found them, then don't worry so much about your weight. But if you're going to remain so concerned with what other people think, then I'll tell you straight up. None of that bull. No "nice."

I'm pretty sure that the point of a message board is not to constantly self-righteously lecture people, but that's what you seem to think it's for. I dread seeing your posts and I know I'm not the only one.


I read through these replies and i find myself a little confused... is the reason the tread was started because you want to know the reason for discrimination? Or reprimand people for making discriminations?


I don't know what the people who are replying with lectures want, but what I wanted to do was talk about the various stereotypes that are often attributed to fat people and hear stories about seeing them in action. I'm sure we've got some not so svelte members here that have had these experiences and could talk about them. I'm not some dewey-eyed kid who wants to know the reasons bad things happen nor was I raging at the unfairness of it all, just trying to talk to people about common experiences.

The last thing I wanted was simplistic diet advice that assumes, stereotypically, that I am a lazy slob with no willpower who just needs a kick in the pants. Where that came from I have no idea.


Bull. Crap. Exercise good. Starving. BAD. Starving is only ever a temporary solution, only idiots starve themselves (and said idiots can be a perfectly healthy weight to begin with, just so you know), and it's a temporary solution that will make it HARDER to loose weight in the future.

By starving I mean cutting calories, not doing a hunger artist act. The only way to lose weight is to burn more calories than your bodies needs to maintain your weight. The only ways to do that are to exercise and diet. No one with less than four hours a day in the gym can lose a significant amount of weight without dieting and being hungry, hence, starving.

And really, is "You need to has more willpower, fatty," the best advice you can give? Yeah, it's really just that easy I guess. I wonder why no one has ever thought of that before and cured obesity. I'll be sure to inform the Nobel Committee of your discovery.

You guys realize that many of you have just spent a couple of pages supporting the same positions as a guy who said he thinks fat people are likely to hog all the egg rolls at the Chinese buffet, right?

[HootNanny]

Just look at it this way. Some attractive people lack the common sense to realize how many medical and/or genetic factors can and often do play a role in being overweight.

And as it was mentioned, starving yourself isn't any way to loose weight. You may loose fat, but you also loose muscle. And guess which comes back faster as soon as you begin to eat regularly?

[Sparticus]

By starving I mean cutting calories, not doing a hunger artist act. The only way to lose weight is to burn more calories than your bodies needs to maintain your weight. The only ways to do that are to exercise and diet. No one with less than four hours a day in the gym can lose a significant amount of weight without dieting and being hungry, hence, starving.

And really, is "You need to has more willpower, fatty," the best advice you can give? Yeah, it's really just that easy I guess. I wonder why no one has ever thought of that before and cured obesity. I'll be sure to inform the Nobel Committee of your discovery.

You guys realize that many of you have just spent a couple of pages supporting the same positions as a guy who said he thinks fat people are likely to hog all the egg rolls at the Chinese buffet, right?

... you know, if you're hungry after a work out, it's perfectly okay to eat a granola bar or an apple or something. Actually, the fruit will help keep you hydrated.

The dumb part is that is really IS that simple. Billions and billions of dollars are being spent on researching why we're getting fatter, trying to pin the blame down on some factor or another; and some interesting tidbits of biochemical knowledge have been discovered, but it still all comes down to willpower. If someone wants to loose the weight - really, REALLY want to, and are smart about it. They will. And keep it off. It's hard, there's a lot of factors against them, but they have to keep going.

If they don't, they just become statistics and reinforce the stereotypes. *shrugs* I probably read too much shounen manga, but to me, breaking those stereotypes, beating the odds, and proving that something can be done are pretty damn good reasons to do something.

And as for the eggrolls - CLEARLY that guy hasn't been to a Chinese buffet with me. I'm a healthy weight but I am ALL OVER the eggrolls. BWA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

[Shawn Hopkins]

... you know, if you're hungry after a work out, it's perfectly okay to eat a granola bar or an apple or something. Actually, the fruit will help keep you hydrated.

The dumb part is that is really IS that simple. Billions and billions of dollars are being spent on researching why we're getting fatter, trying to pin the blame down on some factor or another; and some interesting tidbits of biochemical knowledge have been discovered, but it still all comes down to willpower. If someone wants to loose the weight - really, REALLY want to, and are smart about it. They will. And keep it off. It's hard, there's a lot of factors against them, but they have to keep going.

If they don't, they just become statistics and reinforce the stereotypes. *shrugs*

And as for the eggrolls - CLEARLY that guy hasn't been to a Chinese buffet with me. I'm a healthy weight but I am ALL OVER the eggrolls. BWA HA HA HA HA HA!!!


It does not all come down to willpower. It comes down to finding a sensible negative caloric balance that includes a level of deprivation and exertion you can stand over the period of time you need to lose the weight. Then adjusting your diet and exercise after losing the weight to a neutral caloric balance. Making things unnecessarily hard and then expecting people to "tough it out" is high school gym teacher logic or, yeah, something that would fit well in a dumb Shonen manga, and it's why many dieters fail.

[SilentBat18]

i don't know what the people who are replying with lectures want, but what i wanted to do was talk about the various stereotypes that are often attributed to fat people and hear stories about seeing them in action. I'm sure we've got some not so svelte members here that have had these experiences and could talk about them. I'm not some dewey-eyed kid who wants to know the reasons bad things happen nor was i raging at the unfairness of it all, just trying to talk to people about common experiences.

The last thing i wanted was simplistic diet advice that assumes, stereotypically, that i am a lazy slob with no willpower who just needs a kick in the pants. Where that came from i have no idea.

I guess assumptions like that are a stereotype in itself.... assumptions in general, not just of fat people. When i tell people i'm arab, they get this surprised look on their face and say "You don't look arab!" Yeah, i'm fair skinned and dont wear a head dress but so do millions of other people in the middle east... oh and we're not all extremist... SURPRISE!




and as for the eggrolls - clearly that guy hasn't been to a chinese buffet with me. I'm a healthy weight but i am all over the eggrolls. Bwa ha ha ha ha ha!!!

Just stay away from the orange chicken... that's my territory.

[Kitschensyngk]

Little changes in your daily routine can help you lose weight, I've found.

In my last year of college I decided to save money and not buy a permit to park on campus, which usually had me park two to three blocks downhill and hike to class or work five days a week.

I'm not the athletic type, so I was out of breath a lot, but it did have results: there is a large-sized Fenway Park T-shirt amongst my clothes that fits me better now than when I first bought it.

[chdr]

It seems to me that most of the people advocating "go to the gym" and "eat a healthy diet" have no idea how hard that is in practice. I'm fat. Genetically, I can't burn carbohydrates well. I constantly go to the gym, eat small meals, and eat healthy. Do you think fat people are fat simply because they didn't want to be skinny enough? You don't know how hard it is unless you've been there yourself.

[SilentBat18]

It seems to me that most of the people advocating "go to the gym" and "eat a healthy diet" have no idea how hard that is in practice. I'm fat. Genetically, I can't burn carbohydrates well. I constantly go to the gym, eat small meals, and eat healthy. Do you think fat people are fat simply because they didn't want to be skinny enough? You don't know how hard it is unless you've been there yourself.

Have you seen a nutritionist/Doctor? you might have an allergy to a certain food that you might not even know about, like grains or gluten. I'm just speculating, i'm not a specialist or anything close. But if you really are sticking to things that help others lose weight, there might be another reason the pounds aren't coming off like they should

[chdr]

Have you seen a nutritionist/Doctor? you might have an allergy to a certain food that you might not even know about, like grains or gluten. I'm just speculating, i'm not a specialist or anything close. But if you really are sticking to things that help others lose weight, there might be another reason the pounds aren't coming off like they shouldIt's not a specific allergy to anything, it's just something that runs in my family. I've been losing weight pretty well recently, but I wouldn't say that I'm skinny by any means. My point still stands that some people can lose weight faster than others, and that you can't use general blanket statements with this stuff.

[JD08]

Look the man didn't ask for a snooty "I'm better then you and as soon as your thin you'll be proud of yourself and society will except you so we won't feel bad when we start a campaign against fat people!" He asked for stories about being overweight and why being overweight has become a bad taboo.

I've struggled with obesity all my life now in college my weight continues to flunctuate because of my depression it's gotten to be 300 back to 200 it even spiked to 400 back in high school but I wasn't the giant fatty struggling for air I kept up with the best of em' I even chased down a track star without barging into a single gawker. I'm not even fat all-around it's just my upper body my lower body is thick and muscle and I'm able to carry it and I'm happy. When somebody says you need to lose weight I say you need to kiss my ass. Because I love being the big guy that way they'll underestimate me when I show them something that'll blow there mind.

Which is why we need to drop this lose weight or you'll die or that fat people are un-discplined monsters who'll eat off your arm if it was covered in butter attitude because it's not helping anyone but thinner people's already inflated egos. looking at us as if to say I may be a lot of things but at least I'm not that fat guy. And that's happen to me a guy thought i couldn't hear him and he said if I was that fat I'd kill myself or cry everyday. You don't know the whole story I don't care if you lost it or not. Leave fat people alone let them eat their extra fries let them eat whatever they want because all your doing is making them feel bad about themselves soon they'll think of starving themselves and it could end up in suicide because of your Tony Little/Richard Simmons attitudes. Which I hope then your egos will able to handle

[Marvin Tikvah]

Obesity is not a lifestyle choice, it's a disease that negatively affects people and their lives. The body isn't meant to carry all that weight.

Do you realize what the scientific definition of Obesity is?

Look at a BMI Index. You'll be surprised just what is considered "Obese" nowadays. Calling it a disease when its more of a category is completely insulting.

[Baseball]

I'm pretty sure that the point of a message board is not to constantly self-righteously lecture people, but that's what you seem to think it's for. I dread seeing your posts and I know I'm not the only one.
Message boards are a great way for like-minded people to agree with each other, and there's little opposition. In all honesty, you don't have to read my posts--I'm offering a view that challenges yours, and thus, there is discussion. You're trying to turn this into a personal attack because I've challenged your sense of self or offended you. But I'm not looking down upon you, I'm telling what I think. This is an objective view. Part of the beauty of the internet is anonymity. People lie to protect their loved ones, and I'm no different. But here, that doesn't have to be the case. So take it or leave it. Regardless of your anal comparisons and avoidance of what I've said, I'm making a point to show you how the real world is.


I don't know what the people who are replying with lectures want, but what I wanted to do was talk about the various stereotypes that are often attributed to fat people and hear stories about seeing them in action. I'm sure we've got some not so svelte members here that have had these experiences and could talk about them. I'm not some dewey-eyed kid who wants to know the reasons bad things happen nor was I raging at the unfairness of it all, just trying to talk to people about common experiences.
That's not what it seemed like, especially considering your behavior earlier in the thread. You were coming up with excuses as to why obesity is okay, and as such, I wanted to show you why it's not. I'm not patronizing you or treating you like a child in any way by doing this--it's the truth. If this topic continued and became an "Obesity is A-OK!" circle, that would only serve to reinforce those ideas.


The last thing I wanted was simplistic diet advice that assumes, stereotypically, that I am a lazy slob with no willpower who just needs a kick in the pants. Where that came from I have no idea.
I wasn't even challenging you directly; my statements are indirect for a reason. As far as "simplistic advice" goes, people who want to hear more can inquire. This isn't a topic asking about specific methods to improve physical fitness. But there's a place for showing the necessity in this thread.


Just look at it this way. Some attractive people lack the common sense to realize how many medical and/or genetic factors can and often do play a role in being overweight.
Although genetics are a factor, they aren't the be all end all. Just because you're more likely to be overweight due to your genes, that doesn't stop millions of people from fighting that.

[Shawn Hopkins]

Message boards are a great way for like-minded people to agree with each other, and there's little opposition. In all honesty, you don't have to read my posts--I'm offering a view that challenges yours, and thus, there is discussion. You're trying to turn this into a personal attack because I've challenged your sense of self or offended you. But I'm not looking down upon you, I'm telling what I think. This is an objective view. Part of the beauty of the internet is anonymity. People lie to protect their loved ones, and I'm no different. But here, that doesn't have to be the case. So take it or leave it. Regardless of your anal comparisons and avoidance of what I've said, I'm making a point to show you how the real world is.


Look. I'm old. I've been around. I covered rape and murder and mayhem and dirty politics as a reporter for a decade. I've seen actual human beings at their absolute worst and I've seen the nasty results of their actions close enough to toss my cookies on them. And that's not to mention the hellacious and depressing to think about things I've lived through in my personal life. I don't need some guy who is afraid to use his real name to get on his high horse and tell me how the world works, tell me how to live my life, or explain that prejudice exists to me. I've known that last since I first heard my grandpa cussin' about the negroes.



That's not what it seemed like, especially considering your behavior earlier in the thread. You were coming up with excuses as to why obesity is okay, and as such, I wanted to show you why it's not. I'm not patronizing you or treating you like a child in any way by doing this--it's the truth. If this topic continued and became an "Obesity is A-OK!" circle, that would only serve to reinforce those ideas.


At no point did that happen or did I say anything like that. sdp said something ridiculous about losing weight being easy, I corrected him and then here came you and everyone else with unnecessary and off-topic "advice."



I wasn't even challenging you directly; my statements are indirect for a reason. As far as "simplistic advice" goes, people who want to hear more can inquire. This isn't a topic asking about specific methods to improve physical fitness. But there's a place for showing the necessity in this thread.


It wasn't appropriate for this thread at all. This thread was supposed to gather some examples of stereotypes of fat people and discuss personal experiences people have had with those stereotypes, but apparently just about everyone who has posted so far forgot to read the first post.

Does anyone have an on-topic example or response?

[AerostarMonk]

I am a full on fat guy who actually does fit some of these stereotypes. I'm lazy, I have no willpower, and I'm a compulsive overeater. I eat whenever I'm bored or have intense feelings of either happiness or sadness. I don't get any joy out of exercise no matter how much I do it. And I find a lot of the foods that would help me lose weight, like most fruits and vegetables, utterly disgusting. So I guess I deserve all the ridicule I can get.

[Baseball]

Look. I'm old. I've been around. I covered rape and murder and mayhem dirty politics as a reporter for a decade. I've seen actual human beings at their absolute worst and I've seen the nasty results of their actions close enough to toss my cookies on them. And that's not to mention the hellacious and depressing to think about things I've lived through in my personal life. I don't need some guy who is afraid to use his real name to get on his high horse and tell me how the world works, tell me how to live my life, or explain that prejudice exists to me. I've known that last since I first heard my grandpa cussin' about the negroes.
Are you proposing that because I'm not using my real name on the internet that I don't know how the world works? Or is it because I choose not to give out my business online that, somehow, my point is less valid? I'm sorry, I don't see the connection between those two thoughts.

I may have been explaining that prejudice existed, but only because you seemed to be asking for a reason as to why fat people are seen in this light.


At no point did that happen or did I say anything like that. sdp said something ridiculous about losing weight being easy, I corrected him and then here came you and everyone else with unnecessary and off-topic "advice."
"If it were easy to lose weight don't you think more people would do it? For anyone over 21 whose metabolism has slowed down it's a slow, painful process that takes months of exercise and starving yourself."


It wasn't appropriate for this thread at all. This thread was supposed to gather some examples of stereotypes of fat people and discuss personal experiences people have had with those stereotypes, but apparently just about everyone who has posted so far forgot to read the first post.
If you want to talk about inappropriate, take a look at your prior posts where you throw out personal attacks towards everyone who disagrees with you. Secondly, my first response was an answer as to why fat people are seen as "lazy" and the logic behind the people who feel as such. Re-read my first post in this topic and see how it pertains. I said 'yes, working out isn't easy, but it's impermanent and here's why others think obesity coincides with these stereotypes.' You then proceeded to tell me to stick my head up my ass.

[Sparticus]

It does not all come down to willpower. It comes down to finding a sensible negative caloric balance that includes a level of deprivation and exertion you can stand over the period of time you need to lose the weight. Then adjusting your diet and exercise after losing the weight to a neutral caloric balance. Making things unnecessarily hard and then expecting people to "tough it out" is high school gym teacher logic or, yeah, something that would fit well in a dumb Shonen manga, and it's why many dieters fail.

Yeah... but how many people are ON the right diet, are doing everything right, are getting results - albiet slowly then... just fall off? They don't feel they're progressing fast enough, or in the case of women have an annoying hormonal flux and gain a bunch of weight in the space of a week (I haaaaaaaate that), or end up having to live off of fast food for a couple of days do to just flat out not having time to cook - or any number of other factors, then deem the diet a failure and just quit.

Just like that, after months of doing so well, they just toss it away. What do you call that?

Lack. Of. Willpower.



Just stay away from the orange chicken... that's my territory.

M'kay.

[DarthGonzo]

This thread...wow. Words fail me. Sorry you're fighting an uphill battle here Shawn.

So many people here are acting like they know what they're talking about and they have the answers, but everyone is different, everyone's bodies are different and some of the stuff I've read in this thread make me want to find the mother of face palm images and post it here.

[Shawn Hopkins]

Are you proposing that because I'm not using my real name on the internet that I don't know how the world works? Or is it because I choose not to give out my business online that, somehow, my point is less valid? I'm sorry, I don't see the connection between those two thoughts.

I may have been explaining that prejudice existed, but only because you seemed to be asking for a reason as to why fat people are seen in this light.


"If it were easy to lose weight don't you think more people would do it? For anyone over 21 whose metabolism has slowed down it's a slow, painful process that takes months of exercise and starving yourself."


If you want to talk about inappropriate, take a look at your prior posts where you throw out personal attacks towards everyone who disagrees with you. Secondly, my first response was an answer as to why fat people are seen as "lazy" and the logic behind the people who feel as such. Re-read my first post in this topic and see how it pertains. I said 'yes, working out isn't easy, but it's impermanent and here's why others think obesity coincides with these stereotypes.' You then proceeded to tell me to stick my head up my ass.

You're reaching now, just trying to keep things going by nitpicking and attacking irrelevant points and twisting words and doing "I said this and then you said this" in a topic that's just on its third page. But, in order.

Yes, calling yourself "Mr. Toto" does kind of deflate your "expert on everything" attitude a bit. What I'm telling you is that is that I have enough life experience that I don't need unsolicited advice, on anything, from you. Especially the terrible and patronizing advice you always give.

I at no point asked why fat people are seen in that light. I thought I seemed very aware of what the stereotypes are. I asked for more examples and personal experience. I explained that even though they are seen in that light, it is inappropriate to make assumptions about anyone based on their physical appearance. All I can get from your contrary responses is that you think it is fine to make assumptions about people based on physical appearances, or at least that the practice is something we should accept without fighting or protesting.

You can't get "it's okay to be fat" out of that quote, no matter how much you squeeze it. Just acknowledging that it's not easy to lose weight is not claiming being fat is okay.

You were being inappropriate by going off topic. What you posted had nothing to do with the topic, just with stroking your ego by "correcting" me. And I didn't say you should stick your head up your ass, I implied it was already there. :) That was rude and I'm sorry, but your attitude is very angrymaking.

This is the last word on this from me to you, post whatever you want but I won't keep grinding these pebbles into sand with you.

[Baseball]

Yes, calling yourself "Mr. Toto" does kind of deflate your "expert on everything" attitude a bit. What I'm telling you is that is that I have enough life experience that I don't need unsolicited advice, on anything, from you. Especially the terrible and patronizing advice you always give.
Other topics would suggest otherwise about your "knowledge," especially considering all of the information that you've said about yourself. As far as my advice being "terrible" and "patronizing" goes, I didn't realize that it's a bad thing to work out and improve yourself. Let's take a look at some of those terrible things that I said, shall we?

"...it only takes an hour of time in your day to work out. Three or four times a week, that's a solid plan. A lot of times people will make the excuse that they don't have the time, but it's more so reallocation. Instead of watching TV for an hour, go to the gym. Hell, you can knock it out before you have to go to work; showering there and going straight there afterward."

"...people can change their diets; knocking out junk food and fast food is the largest part."

"You can lose weight and change your diet and be a genuinely healthy person, but only if you want to...You can exercise anywhere too. In the country, go running. Instead of buying McDonalds for a month, save up that money and buy a pull-up bar. Do crunches and push-ups. You can do the same things in the city, or in a park."

"...personality goes a long way. You can be charming and still weigh over 240. You can be ambitious and show it through your actions, dialogue, and mannerisms. You can be confident. Of course, one has to believe it's true as well."

Wow! Just awful! I don't know what I was thinking, telling people that it's possible to change what they don't like about themselves. It's obviously terrible advice, am I right?


I at no point asked why fat people are seen in that light. I thought I seemed very aware of what the stereotypes are. I asked for more examples and personal experience. I explained that even though they are seen in that light, it is inappropriate to make assumptions about anyone based on their physical appearance. All I can get from your responses is that you think it is fine to make assumptions about people based on physical appearances.
"As an adult I do sometimes notice discrimination against me as I am about 6 feet tall and about 240 pounds. A skinny or fit person can go without shaving or look a little messy and people just find them more attractive, but if you're fat your appearance has to be absolutely perfect or people think of you as a disgusting slob. Also, people just seem to be less likely to listen to fat people and their opinions than they do to attractive people. In business meetings a fat person can give an opinion or an idea and it will be ignored, but an attractive or fit person can come along later and repeat the same idea and be praised for it."

At the very least, in this passage it seemed as if you were questioning why these discrepancies exist. You contrast why a fit person can do certain things and why a fat person cannot, and I offered an answer in response. And you're taking my statements about why these these stereotypes exist way out of context. I never said that it's not inappropriate to judge someone based on looks. However, I did say that people will do it regardless of whether or not it's "appropriate." I didn't even state it as my own opinion, yet you seem to be taking it as such.

People are narcissistic and superficial and no matter what you say, someone is always going to judge you based on what you look like. As much as everyone would like for that to be false, it never will be. It's subconscious and happens pretty much in every layer of life. Among children, infants, even the animal kingdom. This phenomenon is present in literally every culture, and you're ignoring that fact.


You can't get "it's okay to be fat" out of that quote, no matter how much you squeeze it. Just acknowledging that it's not easy to lose weight is not claiming being fat is okay.
Your stance in this entire topic seems to be claiming the opposite. You're defending against the discrimination of the obese by attacking people who are proponents of healthy lifestyles. You justify why it isn't easy to lose weight. You made this topic to talk about how people assume traits about a fat person's appearance, but you fail to mention the implications of that. Are you saying that because it's wrong to chastise one for being overweight, that their lifestyle is okay?

"There's such a rush to lecture people on this board and assume they aren't living their lives right and that you are so high and mighty you can tell them what to do. That's not why I made the topic, I wanted to talk about how people often assume stereotypical things about the overweight. The idea that a person is fat because he's lazy or because he eats everything in sight ignorant as assuming a gay person is promiscuous or a black person is stupid. You don't know that person, you don't know why they're fat. But for some reason it's still socially acceptable to put people in categories because of their appearance in this case."

Even if one doesn't know why another is fat, that doesn't make it okay to lead this lifestyle.


You were being inappropriate by going off topic. What you posted had nothing to do with the topic, just with stroking your ego by "correcting" me. And I didn't say you should stick your head up your ass, I implied it was already there. :) That was rude and I'm sorry, but your attitude is very angrymaking.
What I posted had everything to do with the topic. You want me to take you seriously as an adult but then you start patronizing me and getting childish? Are you seriously over the age of 20?

[Desensitized]

This thread...wow. Words fail me. Sorry you're fighting an uphill battle here Shawn.

So many people here are acting like they know what they're talking about and they have the answers, but everyone is different, everyone's bodies are different and some of the stuff I've read in this thread make me want to find the mother of face palm images and post it here.Agreed. This is just pathetic.

[JD08]

This thread just needs to go because were at a stalemate the thinner feel they know everything and can just shed any number of pounds. Giving there advice like they do it themselves. Treating the thicker like were less then them cause were heavier. And the thicker feel were fine just the way we are (which they feel is a crime) or that we have been working hard to get on a diet but some thing's just won't shedding (Which they feel is a lie).

And am I wrong? because ever since I got on this thread most of you have been narcing on our size treating it like it's a disease or they're not attractive enough. Look, people get fat, you may get fat and you'll probably survive get over it.

[GWOtaku]

Obesity is badly overrated in my book. There's health, and then there's this image-conscious bullcrap that is way too prevalent in our culture. I'm not talking about the merits of shedding a little excess weight, or being smart about your diet. I'm talking about things like the too-large percentage of teenage girls that obsess over this stuff to their detriment. "Fat" is one of the most overused words in the American lexicon.

Anyway. There's one point hidden in here that I think deserves to be openly dismantled.


Haha, I'm chiming in with the truth. The point of a message board is to state your own opinion, right? People are narcissistic and superficial and no matter what you say, someone is always going to judge you based on what you look like. As much as everyone would like for that to be false, it never will be. It's subconscious and happens pretty much in every layer of life. Among children, infants, even the animal kingdom. This phenomenon is present in literally every culture, and you're ignoring that fact.


Firstly, it would be wise to not champion a right to opinions immediately after you declare that you have the indisputable truth on your side. Secondly, I've never seen anyone overrate nature over nuture as badly as you seem to. I'll take you at your word that you're not excusing people's prejudices, but by glossing over them as inevitable and making all these uninvited suggestions for change it's very easy to conclude that the message is basically "yeah, people can be stupid and ignorant and wrong, but if you're a victim of that the burden is on you to change."

That has rather discomforting implications, and it's also pretty absurd. You already cited that weight is changeable whereas race and sex is not (let's keep this simple and not get into uber expensive surgery), but do you really think that distinction matters? Surely we don't have to comb through the history of discrimination that everybody already knows to acknowledge that living a life completely contrary to every stereotype in the book isn't enough to placate the most hardcore or ignorant of the prejudiced.

What's more, you can't cite the fact of easy & early first impressions to make a case that we're all "narcissistic and superficial" deep down inside. That's just cynical nonsense. In another post you list off generic stereotypes and seemingly ask us to believe that everyone believes them, which is ridiculous. I don't care if anyone believes people are really that stupid; at the very least, we are certainly not monolithic in terms of thought or anything else. What's more, attitudes can and do change. For starters, racial attitudes are certainly different from what they were decades ago or a century ago. We can examine the state of our current society to back that up, as well as considerable polling data. More directly on point, there are periods and cultures in history where more obese people were considered more attractive. Heck, compare Marilyn Monroe to the hyper-idealized models of today. Attitudes about appearances do change!

So no, attitudes about appearances are not rigid. And I'll never agree that individuals can't overpower shallow, base assumptions with the aid of reason and experience. Maybe that's optimistic (a thing I make no apology for), but that deduction is also grounded in demonstrable reality.

[kaseykockroach]

I swear, threads like these are so brain-damaging, I feel like I just ate at Taco Bell or McDonald's reading this stuff.
The guy wanted to discuss how overweight people are stereotyped and such, and instead everyone jumps in and gives him advice on how to lose weight, which had NOTHING to do with the topic. You guys are talking to Shawn like he's sick or something.

[Jave]

This topic is so messed up, that I honestly don't know what side to take. That's a first for me EVER on these boards.

So I'll just say this: In the past two months I've been seeing a nutricionist and I lost seven pounds during that time.

That is all.

The end.

[Lelouch]

Yeah, I am the slightest bit scared to participate right now.

However, with that being said...I have never been overweight in my life, but I have never been really skinny. I have always had the slightest bit of "baby" fat, so to speak. But instead of growing out of it...I didn't. I mean I have 6 foot and about 160 pounts, so I am in the right weight range.

When I became aware that I had this..."pudge" I tried my hardest to lose it. I had already been swimming year-round for 15 years and I work out everyday. I am decent with my eating, but it could be better. That being said, I still haven't lost the pudge and that is alright.

So, I am just going to say that sometimes it really isn't as simple as working out and eating right. Sometimes you just can't lose the weight, and there isn't anything wrong with that.

Now I am at a point, being in college, where it is all about not gaining weight, rather than losing.

[defunctzombie]

Well if you're overweight it means that you don't take care of your body, in a way its no different from someone who doesn't shower or whatnot.


The problem is that no one ever wants to actually show willpower and follow through with it.

Ouch. :( Maybe it's just because I'm in a down phase but those two statements really bug me. I weigh about 60-70 pounds more than I should, but I'm not in the same category as those who don't shower. And I try to do my best to follow through with my dieting but there's other obstacles besides lack of willpower. Eating right costs more money, and it's hard to buy better stuff when you have to fill up a gas tank every week. A subway is 4 bucks, and mcdonalds is two bucks. When you only have a little amount of money to spend, what choice do you have?

[sun]

A little is easy to lose, especially for a young person. What about a lot? Look, I know it can be done, but I resent the idea that it's easy. It's not easy, it's very difficult for many people.

Shawn is correct here...absolutley correct.
In fact, food addiction is the number one health problem in the U.S.A right now. As you read these words, 100 million of us are overweight, one third.

No matter what is said about this, it is an epidemic right now. Heart Disiease is the number one killer, and excess weight is the number one cause of it.

People who simplify this by using steriotypes miss the point. This is a very important problem for us. It is nothing to make fun of.

[sun]

This site,
www.oa.org (http://www.oa.org)

stands for Overeaters Anonymous. Similiar to AA in content and form, it will give honest information about this addiction. Good Luck to all who face this awful problem. I know someone who lost 50 pounds by following their program and kept it off for many years. The following is a quote from ther site...

"Overeaters Anonymous offers a program of recovery from compulsive eating using the twelve steps and twelve traditions of OA. Worldwide meetings and other tools provide a fellowship of experience, strength and hope where members respect one another’s anonymity. OA charges no dues or fees; it is self-supporting through member contributions.
OA is not just about weight loss, gain or maintenance; or obesity or diets. It addresses physical, emotional and spiritual well-being. It is not a religious organization and does not promote any particular diet. If you want to stop your compulsive overeating, welcome to Overeaters Anonymous."

[Chazooma]

I used to hear talk behind my back about my weight.
It hurt a lot, and I felt horrible about myself everyday. I hardly ever wanted to look in mirrors because I was unhappy with my body.
So starting in 7th grade, I started eating a lot better, and running laps around the neighborhood along with DDR became the daily norm.
It was really hard at first, a sort of on and off thing, but I eventually fell into the habit and it became easier week-by-week.
I lost about 30 pounds in 4-5 months, and I fell into the underweight zone.
I noticed that the talking stopped, and people I didn't know that well seemed to treat me better.

In 8th grade, do you know what a girl in my class said? (she was around to see me when I was fat)
"I hate fat people, they disgust me. I would never want to talk with one."
It really hit me hard, that's what she thought of me before I lost all my extra pounds. I then realized that after my weight loss, she was a lot friendlier to me than before.

I know what it's like to be degraded because of your weight. It's not a good feeling either. I never poke fun of 'fat' people, and I know what it's like to not be happy with the person you see in the mirror. I think the stereotype is cruel, just because someone looks different, doesn't mean that they're any less of a person than the next. There are some I know who are 'fat', but are entirely happy with themselves. I wasn't (and still aren't) one of them, so I found my own solution to becoming more comfortable.

I learned that many in this world are vain, but there are also many out there who look past your appearance, which was why I had friends before my weight loss.

[OnePark]

It doesn't bother me one bit that I'm fat. I am up and down with my weight, mostly up as of late. My constant surgeries keep me in bed a lot. Heck, I haven't drove in seven months because of the last two being so close together.

[Baseball]

Firstly, it would be wise to not champion a right to opinions immediately after you declare that you have the indisputable truth on your side.
I'll give you that this isn't a truth for everyone, but this is largely the case. Or at least, it's what's portrayed largely in both pop culture, religion, and literally all forms of media. Again, I think this is a situation of where people think that because I'm iterating this, I must feel the same way.


Secondly, I've never seen anyone overrate nature over nuture as badly as you seem to. I'll take you at your word that you're not excusing people's prejudices, but by glossing over them as inevitable and making all these uninvited suggestions for change it's very easy to conclude that the message is basically "yeah, people can be stupid and ignorant and wrong, but if you're a victim of that the burden is on you to change."
But in a lot of cases, change is the only thing that will work. What about that fat child being treated as worthless on a playground? That torment will literally follow him for the rest of his life. Several members here have made it a point to say that of themselves, and I've also seen it throughout my life too. There are a lot of good people out there, but it only takes one jackass to break a person. As such, sometimes a radical kick in the pants is what's needed. Sometimes the only way to get back at them is by showing them what one can be. It's not fair and it sucks, but that's what the modern world has become.

My suggestions are uninvited, sure. But this is a discussion board. I have right to post my dissenting opinion, and I'll say what I believe in order to back it up. If you want to talk uninvited, why don't we go into this non-neutral stance I've been seeing here? I've made it a point not to bash anyone, and that's hardly the case here.


That has rather discomforting implications, and it's also pretty absurd. You already cited that weight is changeable whereas race and sex is not (let's keep this simple and not get into uber expensive surgery), but do you really think that distinction matters? Surely we don't have to comb through the history of discrimination that everybody already knows to acknowledge that living a life completely contrary to every stereotype in the book isn't enough to placate the most hardcore or ignorant of the prejudiced.
Yeah, the distinction does matter. Weight is different from sex and race. It's a completely separate league. I'm not trying to undermine the hurt that one can feel and the isolation that can be caused as a result from any sort of teasing. But there's a large difference between the two that can't be ignored for the sake of any argument.


What's more, you can't cite the fact of easy & early first impressions to make a case that we're all "narcissistic and superficial" deep down inside. That's just cynical nonsense.
Countless people who study it argue otherwise. Even the most basic forms of life exhibit biases towards certain traits. They choose mates and lead packs because of certain traits. You're also assuming that I'm speaking for everyone, and that simply isn't the case. I used the word "someone" in that sentence specifically to convey the fact that I didn't mean everyone believed such things. Only a fool would think as such.


In another post you list off generic stereotypes and seemingly ask us to believe that everyone believes them, which is ridiculous. I don't care if anyone believes people are really that stupid; at the very least, we are certainly not monolithic in terms of thought or anything else. What's more, attitudes can and do change. For starters, racial attitudes are certainly different from what they were decades ago or a century ago. We can examine the state of our current society to back that up, as well as considerable polling data. More directly on point, there are periods and cultures in history where more obese people were considered more attractive. Heck, compare Marilyn Monroe to the hyper-idealized models of today. Attitudes about appearances do change!
Nowhere do I say that everyone believes racial and gender stereotypes, I merely acknowledge their existence through example. Take, for instance, the fallout after September 11th. Never in my life had I ever seen Arabic people so discriminated against because seemingly, they represented an evil force trying to destroy America. Not just among children and adults, but actual influential people took the same stance because they were afraid. And the attempted bombing of an airplane from a Nigerian man a couple of months back. Everyone was afraid of the threat to national security, and security made drastic changes. But literally the next day, another Nigerian man was arrested because he was having bowel troubles in the toilet the next day. The entire plane was up in arms against Nigerians. That's criminal profiling, and our police still do that. Minorities get pulled over in cars because of who they are. And the Internment Camps of the Japanese during WWII? You know, where the government imprisoned every single Japanese person in the States because of where their homeland was? If the people running the country were capable of such prejudice, citizens can as well. Secondarily, I know you've probably heard the stereotypes I listed prior as well. From where do they originate? Out of humor or genuine hate?

You say racial attitudes have changed, and by and large they have. But don't assume that they've vanished. On the contrary; this stuff still happens daily. Even in other countries. The wars between Africa and South Africa? Darfur and Sudan? The Burakumin of Japan? Segregation and gentrification? Xenophobia and ostracization?

There's also a large difference between "obesity" and "having a few extra pounds." Marilyn Monroe wasn't obese by any sense of the word. Even in the 40s, the ideal woman was someone like Brigitte Bardot. The image you're speaking of dates back literally centuries.

And since when have I ever been arguing for perfection? I'm talking about losing weight for health's sake, and also for appearance. When people shed those pounds, they feel better about themselves. Time and time again, this is the case. I've never met anyone who's lost a lot of weight and felt that they had made a mistake. It changes entire outlooks on life, and it changes the way you're viewed by virtually everyone.


So no, attitudes about appearances are not rigid. And I'll never agree that individuals can't overpower shallow, base assumptions with the aid of reason and experience. Maybe that's optimistic (a thing I make no apology for), but that deduction is also grounded in demonstrable reality.
Yeah, individuals. Individuals can also be the only person to torment a person because of who they are, and a group of like-minded individuals changes the status quo. Optimism is admirable and fine, but despite all you've said, you haven't offered anything concrete that shows that there aren't people who discriminate other than your faith in them.

The media portrays a different ideal than what these individuals believe in. God is in the television screen, and His dogma is written Entertainment Weekly. How many hold these opinions in reverence? How many believe these ideals to be true? You're underestimating the power these stereotypes have said simply because they're viewed on TV. As the years go by, more and more, the things shown on TV are becoming our world's reality.

[Shawn Hopkins]

I used to hear talk behind my back about my weight.
It hurt a lot, and I felt horrible about myself everyday. I hardly ever wanted to look in mirrors because I was unhappy with my body.
So starting in 7th grade, I started eating a lot better, and running laps around the neighborhood along with DDR became the daily norm.
It was really hard at first, a sort of on and off thing, but I eventually fell into the habit and it became easier week-by-week.
I lost about 30 pounds in 4-5 months, and I fell into the underweight zone.
I noticed that the talking stopped, and people I didn't know that well seemed to treat me better.

In 8th grade, do you know what a girl in my class said? (she was around to see me when I was fat)
"I hate fat people, they disgust me. I would never want to talk with one."
It really hit me hard, that's what she thought of me before I lost all my extra pounds. I then realized that after my weight loss, she was a lot friendlier to me than before.

I know what it's like to be degraded because of your weight. It's not a good feeling either. I never poke fun of 'fat' people, and I know what it's like to not be happy with the person you see in the mirror. I think the stereotype is cruel, just because someone looks different, doesn't mean that they're any less of a person than the next. There are some I know who are 'fat', but are entirely happy with themselves. I wasn't (and still aren't) one of them, so I found my own solution to becoming more comfortable.

I learned that many in this world are vain, but there are also many out there who look past your appearance, which was why I had friends before my weight loss.

See this great post, this is exactly the kind of post I was asking for. Personal experiences with stereotypes. This on topic. More like this please.

[purplehairedwonder]

I see too much downhill in this thread to risk leaving it open. Gotta play nice to keep threads open, guys.