Do I have a choice?

[Ickis]

My parents divorced 7 or so months ago and I've had to keep going to my fathers every other weekend as it says I have to in the decree, what I'd like to know is do I have a choice or is it my parents desicion or did they sign a sheet of paper that I wish to burn?

[Kagetsu]

My parents divorced 7 or so months ago and I've had to keep going to my fathers every other weekend as it says I have to in the decree, what I'd like to know is do I have a choice or is it my parents desicion or did they sign a sheet of paper that I wish to burn?

Yes and no. Your parents, both father and mother have a birth right to be a part of your life. the divorce is not about you and nothing to do with whether you like one more than the other. I've had both parents married most of my life and I still question if there is anything my father and I have in common,,, except arrogance and looks. Unless a court of law can prove a parent unfit,,, and many divorces play that card, you are subject to both parents until you're 18. None of us choose our parents. Your genetic seed is there, as well as your legal care. And I see my father in me no matter how much I hate it.

The one thing I would add,,, don't judge from what you're told by the "other parent". Trust your heart. You are a part of them both,,, what you dislike as much as what you like. But you are are you. Make your stands that you want, not what other people tell you.,

[Jave]

My parents divorced 7 or so months ago and I've had to keep going to my fathers every other weekend as it says I have to in the decree, what I'd like to know is do I have a choice or is it my parents desicion or did they sign a sheet of paper that I wish to burn?Sorry about your parents' divorce, but I'm not sure what you mean. You're asking this because you don't want to see your dad at all, or you want to visit your dad at different times?

Either way, I believe you don't have a choice in the matter since you're still a minor and both your parents share a right to be with you. Although I think someone with more legal knowledge on the matter should post.

[Tay the Cat]

Judging from my own experience, if you want to change that, you have to go to court.

I didn't want to go through all of that, so I sucked it up until I turned 18 and decided I had enough.

[Harvey Two Face]

From what I know you have to see both parents as decreed by the courts unless either of those parents is seen to be unfit to be around or unable to manage their children. But this should be your choice and so make your own decisions about your parents based on what you think.

[Lavenderpaw]

Yes and no. Your parents, both father and mother have a birth right to be a part of your life. the divorce is not about you and nothing to do with whether you like one more than the other. I've had both parents married most of my life and I still question if there is anything my father and I have in common,,, except arrogance and looks. Unless a court of law can prove a parent unfit,,, and many divorces play that card, you are subject to both parents until you're 18. None of us choose our parents. Your genetic seed is there, as well as your legal care. And I see my father in me no matter how much I hate it.



Bitter,much?Look,parents aren't perfect.They're human beings.But they're your parents.Original poster,I know it's not easy to get through a divorce but it's just one of those things.Statistically speaking,1 in 3 teenage marriages are destined to flop completely.Of course,that's just random stat.:sweat: Right now you are the center of your parents want and unless they try to make you choose sides (in which case you tell them you will not) then don't worry about it.I speak from experience,also.Parents divorced since 2001. :sad:

[cathedral]

My parents divorced 7 or so months ago and I've had to keep going to my fathers every other weekend as it says I have to in the decree, what I'd like to know is do I have a choice or is it my parents desicion or did they sign a sheet of paper that I wish to burn?

you have a choice in this. all you have to do is tell your mom you don't want to go any more and let her see if the lawyers can do anything about it. if there's some reason he's unfit (if you perceive that you are neglected or emotionally abused in ANY way, just fyi being ignored is considered emotional abuse) don't be afraid to tell them that because it will most certainly help free you from this obligation.

if your mom won't agree to help, you can try to contact social services. but if you try to lie to them you could get yourself in trouble. i don't know anything about custody hearings though and you could end up making things a lot more painful for your mom and dad.

just because you appear young doesn't mean you're not the most mature person in the room. just because you appear old doesn't mean you know it all and have it all together. just remember that. you may actually be older than them in a certain sense, as strange as that sounds. they don't know what the hell they're doing either. the awkwardness is not limited to you. just because they are older or can maintain that facade of composure doesn't mean they're not burning inside like you.

just thoughts. hope something there was useful. good luck and i hope things get better for you.