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Tenku
06-29-2005, 02:48 AM
Lake


It's a typical humid summer night and I'm sitting on the edge of the lake's pier, watching the afterglow of the setting sun slowly fade away, and the glittering of the brightest stars. The crickets and frogs are chirping, making somewhat of a song; an duet acapella.

I breathe in deeply, taking in the piney aroma of the forest. It's great. It's a lot better than breathing smog everyday, and it's so peaceful and quiet. You don't have to worry about traffic jams, noise pollution, and the people. I like my solitude and I don't want to go back there anymore.

I start thinking of my hometown again, and I'm saddened again. Why did I have to move? Sure, it was a small town and hardly anything was there, but... I grew up there. I knew everyone and they knew me. Ever since I moved, I've never been the same. It's hard to get aquainted with people you don't know; they might not like you and you have to try your best to impress them and try to get in whatever clique they have. It's too much for me. I'm not the one to intrude on anybody; I just keep to myself and go about my buisness.

I feel the fish nip at my wiggling toes. They think that they're worms. Either way, I play along.

I sigh. I've basically secluded myself; or they've secluded me. I'm lonely but no one seems to care. I hide my tears as they start to come out, bluring my vision. There's no one around, so why am I hiding them? Is it all because I've been taught not to cry? Do I have so much shame that I am embarrassed about myself?

I hide my face for a couple of minutes until I suddenly hear buzzing noises. I look up and fireflies are fluttering about, blinking on and off. Clusters of them, far off, light up the forest and part of the lake. It's beautiful, but it's also sad to me. The last time I saw fireflies was the last time I saw...

There's footsteps behind me, but I don't bother to turn around; instead I watch the fireflies. "What do you want?" I ask.

"I want to give you something." A guy's voice and he sounds familiar.

I never said to anyone to meet me out here. Hell, no one knows I'm here. But at the same time, I'm suspicous. Could it be... no. I still have my back to him. I could feel the stare burning into my back. I don't care. Unexpectantly, he joins me, disturbing the fish; I turn away.

"I'm sorry that I didn't do it before you left."

My eyes widened and I turned to him, realizing who it was. It had been five years, but here he was, sitting beside me. "What is it?" Before I knew it, he pulled me in and kissed me.

It was a long time before I pulled back. I didn't expect him to do that ever, but I didn't ask why he did it. We stayed silent as we watched the fireflies dance across the lake. The crickets and frogs still sang their interlocking songs.

"I'll probably not see you for a while, will I?" I ask, placing my head on his shoulder.

"We'll be lucky to even glance at each other," he says, resting his hand on top of mine.

I know he's not lying to me, so I don't make any denial of it. "But," he continues, "at least we'll have a memory of each other, of this moment."

---



(A little info: this happened to me as a dream involving my ex-boyfriend from way back. I think there was more dialouge so I only used bits of it. In a way, it kinda plays like Cupid. I digress though.)

Rae
06-29-2005, 01:00 PM
That was really nice!

Is there more?

Rae

LightShadow1890
06-29-2005, 03:41 PM
That was good!!

Is there any more??

ArtificialIdiot
06-29-2005, 04:01 PM
Very interesting. Nice and tranquil, though slightly depressing. Well worth reading, indeed. :)

Xerroo
06-29-2005, 04:03 PM
Very well done. I like.

Youko Recca
06-29-2005, 05:21 PM
Captured the essence perfectly. Good description, nice emotion, and kind of surreal like it's source. Good job.

Tenku
06-29-2005, 06:15 PM
Thanks for the comments. :)

Well, I'm sorry that seemed a bit of a sudden, but like I said, it was a dream. If it hadn't been for my mom barging in my room, waking me up, trust me, it would've been longer. :anime:

Wanted
06-29-2005, 06:58 PM
Bravo, bravo!

Very interesting story, it had me actually viewing the story like it was playing before my eyes. Now, if only I could develop stories like that...

and so it begins...

Matt A
06-29-2005, 07:15 PM
Uplifting and depressing in equal measure: a hard trick to pull off even at the best of times, but managed with ease here. Truly a brilliant piece of writing.:anime: :anime: :anime:

I don't understand how people can remember dreams. There's only two in my entire life that I can remember, of which one made no sense and the other was just bloody boring. But hey, that's me all over.:sad:

Anyway, great work, as per usual.:anime: :anime: :anime: :anime: :anime:

-Matt A-

Reket
07-01-2005, 02:46 AM
I remember about half my dreams..in fact, Foreceful Encounters originated from a dream, which explains its randomness :sweat:

Tenku, you did a fabulous job using first person to its full extent. And great details and imagery, did you really remember all that from your dream? I could see it so clearly! Just watch your past and present tense, I noticed it tended to switch back and forth a little.

Great job, and like Rae and LightShadow1890, I wished there was more to read!

sun
07-03-2005, 07:59 AM
I enjoyed reading this, and felt your sence of lonliness, and at the same time, serenity at the "Lake" The suddeness of your boyfriend showing up, and his warmth, increase the interest, particularly, you explain that this evovlved from a dream...We have all had experiences in dreams where pictures and events suddenly change, for what seems no reason at all...Well done, excellent poem...Stuart