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View Full Version : "Love Hina: The American Way" - Rated PG-13



J. B. Warner
04-01-2005, 10:26 AM
For my first of three movie-length anime fanfics, I present to you the script to "The American Way", my visualization of what it would be like if "Love Hina" got a theatrical release...

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Warner Bros. Pictures Presents
In Association with Bandai Entertainment and Production I.G.

Ken Akamatsu’s
LOVE HINA
The American Way

SCENE: Establishing shot of a beautiful Japanese mountain range. The camera slowly pans past the massive peaks and lush trees before finally coming to rest on a small cabin situated in the woods. A van is parked outside, with banners and cans hanging off the back. One banner in particular reads “JUST MARRIED - FINALLY”.
Cut to inside the cabin. The front door flies open, and Keitaro walks in, carrying Naru over the threshold. He seems to be having a bit of difficulty.

KEITARO (slightly strained): Don’t take this personally, Naru - you’re not heavy, I’m just weak.

NARU: We’re inside, you can put me down now.

KEITARO: Oh, thank God.

Naru gets to her feet and looks around the living room.

NARU: Wow, I can’t believe that this place is ours for the whole week!

KEITARO: I admit it isn’t Todai, but I did the best I could on my savings.

NARU: And here I was thinking that Seta never paid you anything.

Keitaro claps his hands together and looks at Naru.

KEITARO: So, what do you want to do first?

NARU (alluring): Oh, I had something in mind...

Naru flutters her eyelashes seductively.

KEITARO (excited): Oooh! I gotcha!

NARU: You wait here while I go get myself ready - I got something special to wear just for this occasion.

KEITARO: What’s the point? You’ll only be wearin’ it for about thirty seconds?

NARU (laughing): Oh, Keitaro, you sick *******.

KEITARO: Love you too, sweetie.

Naru walks into the bedroom, shutting the door behind her. Keitaro looks around anxiously, and his eyes come to rest on the envelope sitting on the floor beneath the mail slot in the front door.

KEITARO: What the... Mail already?

Keitaro crosses to the door, picks up the envelope, and opens it. He unfolds the letter inside and reads it.

KEITARO: Hey...hey, this sounds interesting!

Keitaro folds the letter back up and puts it in his pocket. He walks over to the bedroom door.

KEITARO: Hey, Naru, you’re not gonna believe this! Guess who just wrote to us?

Keitaro flings the door open and stops dead in his tracks, his expression one of great shock. Naru looks up, in the middle of changing into the translucent gown she has laid out on the bed. Her skirt is already halfway off. She looks enraged.

NARU (frustrated): Keitaro, you sick *******...

Keitaro sighs and closes his eyes. He takes his glasses off.

KEITARO: All right, go ahead...but this is the last time, got it?

NARU: We’ll see!

Naru hauls back and punches Keitaro square in the nose. The force sends Keitaro flying back out the front door of the cabin, skidding across the ground on his head and finally coming to a stop by slamming into a tree trunk. He collapses, unconscious. Naru looks out the front door at her accomplishment and whistles in astonishment.

NARU: Wow, would you look at the distance on that one?

Smash cut to the sky above the Kanagawa prefecture, as the opening credits begin.

Music cue: “All Right Now” by Free

After the main title appears onscreen, the camera pans down to a street in the hot springs region of Hinata. As people stroll up and down the sidewalks, a streetcar makes its way down the track in the middle of the pavement. It begins to slow down as it approaches the curb, in front of a large stone staircase embedded in a hill surrounded by trees. A sign by the stairway indicates the name and open hours of the inn at the top of the hill. The streetcar engineer calls out the name of the stop.

ENGINEER: Hinata Hot Springs. Repeat, Hinata Hot Springs.

At this, Keitaro and Naru wrench open the streetcar door and push their way out of the crowded car, both looking slightly disheveled from being crammed in there so long. Naru yells at a man who is still on board.

NARU: And next time, keep your hands to yourself or it won’t just be your nose that I punch in!

KEITARO: Naru, it is possible he didn’t mean it. I mean, he was brushed up against me too.

NARU (jokingly): Hey, after living with you for seven years, I don’t take any chances.

The two of them make their way up the stone steps, which number at least two hundred. The camera follows their feet as they continue to step.

KEITARO: Well, you should know by now that I never meant it either.

NARU: Really? I always thought you were just a really good liar.

KEITARO: Well, once we get inside, you can ask Shinobu, she’ll vouch for me.

NARU: She’ll vouch for you on anything. She practically embodies the term "lickspittle".

Keitaro and Naru continue to walk, finally reaching the top step. A camera angle from behind them shows the full establishing shot of the Hinata House Girls’ Leased Apartment Complex.

KEITARO: Ah, good old Hinata House. This place brings back the memories.

NARU: Only about half of which are pleasant. You can share them with the other girls once we get inside. They’re always eager to reminisce about the old days.

Fade out music cue.

Cut to the dining room, inside the inn. Mitsune “Kitsune” Konno, Kaolla Su, Ema Maeda, and Motoko Aoyama are already seated at the table, entertaining each other with jokes before dinner. Or at least Kitsune and Su are; Motoko sits with her arms crossed, looking nonplused and irritated, and Ema sits at her spot looking shy.

KITSUNE (struggling to speak coherently while stifling laughter): And so, and so the mother looks up at the school counselor and says, “I know, but not in church!”

Kitsune and Su laugh uproariously. Motoko shakes her head disapprovingly.

MOTOKO: I find that joke offensive and in incredibly poor taste.

SU (still laughing): Yeah, well it finds you offensive and in incredibly poor taste!

Su turns back to face Kitsune.

SU: Did that make sense?

KITSUNE: Who cares?

EMA: Boy, you guys sure don’t pull any punches with your jokes, do you?

Kitsune takes a swig from her beer can.

KITSUNE: Believe me, hang around this joint long enough and you develop a VERY nasty sense of humor.

Cut to the kitchen, where Shinobu is tending to the food. As she opens the oven door and peeks in, she grabs a baster off the counter and squirts it inside. She takes it back out, then pauses and thinks a moment.

SHINOBU: Oh, what the heck.

She empties the baster’s contents onto whatever’s inside the oven. The kitchen door opens, and Keitaro and Naru enter. Shinobu whips the baster out and throws it over her shoulder, slamming the door shut with a loud clang.

SHINOBU: That wasn’t white wine, I dunno what you’re talking about.

KEITARO: It doesn’t matter, we’re all above 18 here.

NARU: All but Ema, and she can just eat around it.

Shinobu turns down the heat on one of the burners atop the stove and removes a boiling pot, taking it over to the sink and draining it with a strainer.

SHINOBU: I’m glad to see you and Naru were able to make it, Sempai. Where’s Mutsumi?

Keitaro shrugs.

KEITARO: Oh, you know her, busy little grad student that she is, she’s got work to catch up on. She says she’ll be here by seven.

Naru looks at her watch.

NARU: Well, that’s about twenty minutes from now, so we might as well settle in. Is Kitsune breaking out the dirty jokes yet?

SHINOBU: You better believe it. She just got finished with her "guidance counselor" one.

KEITARO (aside to Naru): We’d better hurry before we miss the "bullfrog" one.

Keitaro and Naru cross the kitchen and enter the dining room. Again, Kitsune has Su’s attention with another joke, with Motoko and Ema wearing the same expressions as before.

KITSUNE (stifling laughter): And then, the guy looks up from the stove and he says to her, “If I can teach this frog to cook, you’re outta here!”

Kitsune and Su burst out laughing as Ema forces a fake laugh. Motoko rolls her eyes.

MOTOKO (sarcastic): Yes, because I never get tired of THAT one.

Keitaro and Naru seat themselves across from Kitsune and Motoko.

KEITARO: Good to see we’re all in high spirits here.

KITSUNE: Hey, Keitaro, hey, Naru. How goes things with you two love bugs anywho?

NARU: Great! We’ve already decided on a house.

SU: Good for you! It’s a house with a bed, I assume?

Su playfully elbows Ema in the ribs and makes a suggestive “Ooh-hoo-hoo” noise. Ema doesn’t seem to get it.

NARU: That is none of your damn business, Su.

SU: That never stopped me before.

The door to the kitchen slides open, and Shinobu enters with two large bowls of rice. She places them on the table.

SHINOBU: Les appetizers est servi, said the student who sucks at French.

KEITARO: Ooh, looks good, Shinobu I can’t wait to see what the next course looks like.

As each girl fills her own bowl with rice, Keitaro also helps himself. Kitsune glances at him.

KITSUNE: So, Keitaro, while we’re all high-spirited and, for the majority, sober, why don’t you regale us with a few jokes and anecdotes of your own?

SU: Anecdotes? What do those taste like?

Keitaro lowers his bowl and rubs the back of his head.

KEITARO: Well, I have one joke, but you’re all gonna punch me for it.

KITSUNE: Oh, it can’t be that bad! Come on, tell it.

KEITARO: Okay, okay...so, these three women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, all notice that their female boss is taking the lunch period off every day, right? So...

Suddenly, Su reaches across the table and punches Keitaro in the nose, causing him to fall backwards and hit his head on the wall. Everyone in attendance is appalled.

NARU: (upset) Su!

SU (composed): Sorry, pre-emptive strike. Do continue.

Keitaro gets up from below the table, dazed.

KEITARO: No, I’m good, thanks...

Cut to about twenty minutes later. Outside, the sun sinks deeper below the horizon as night sets in. A lone figure makes its way up the Hinata House steps, tailed by a much smaller flying figure. Inside the dining room, the seats at the table are now almost completely filled, except for one at the far end of the table that is reserved for Mutsumi. Everyone else is laughing as they enjoy the main course and the anecdotes shared by Keitaro and Naru. Ema is particularly captivated by their story, having never heard it before. It’s the story of Keitaro and Naru’s adventure off the coast of Okinawa.

NARU: And so I’m flailing around on the life raft begging for water, right? And Mutsumi pulls out, of all things, a bunch of dried squid. And I’m lookin’ at her in, like, total disbelief, like, “Lady, do you even understand the concept of hydration?”

KEITARO: Now, to make matters even worse, this is where our raft decides to spring a leak out of nowhere, okay? So, we’re all going down, and we’re flailing and screaming for help, right, and Mutsumi just sits there – smiling, mind you – and she says “Oh my, this can’t be good, can it?” And of course, she’s the next one to wind up in the drink, naturally...

The door suddenly slides open. Everyone turns to see who’s in the doorway – it’s Mutsumi, with Tama-chan the turtle on her shoulder. She claps her hands together and smiles.

MUTSUMI: Oh me, oh my, I know this story! Back in 1999, right?

NARU: Mutsumi! You made it! How ya been?

MUTSUMI: Oh, can’t complain. Studies are going well, and it’s all thanks to the pencil trick.

Mutsumi pulls a pencil with the numbers one through six written on its sides out of her pocket and rolls it on the table. It stops on the number six.

SHINOBU: I still can’t believe that thing works.

Tama-chan notices how much food is left on the table and flies down to help himself – landing right in front of Motoko’s place. Motoko squirms uneasily.

MOTOKO: Honestly, Otohime, did you have to bring the thing with you?

MUTSUMI: Oh, Tama-chan isn’t posing a threat to anybody.

EMA: Maybe not, but what about the other way around?

For Tama-chan has flown off the table, nanoseconds before Su brings her fork down right where the turtle was sitting. She yanks her utensil out of the table.

SU (shaking her fist): One of these days, turtle...pow! Bam! Right down my gullet!

KEITARO: And about two people around the table got that.

NARU: Anyways, back to the story. So we’re sinking fast, and this is about where I blacked out, and when I wake up, I’m on this island that seems to be in the middle of nowhere. Fortunately, Keitaro and Mutsumi are right be hind me, and this nutball is still unconscious, so I drag him onto the beach so he can dry out...

Naru’s voice fades out as the camera slowly zooms in on Keitaro’s face, who looks around the table – at Naru, Ema, Mutsumi, Tama-chan, Su, Kitsune, Motoko, and Shinobu. He smiles to himself, but is snapped out of his thoughts by something hitting him on the forehead. He sees that Kitsune just hit him with an uneaten sushi bit. She motions for him to join her in the other room. Keitaro cautiously gets up and follows Kitsune into the kitchen.

KEITARO: Kitsune, what have you got planned? Before you do anything rash, keep in mind that Naru and I are married and that you’ve had about five beers in the last twenty minutes...

KITSUNE: No, as hard as this may be to believe, I have other things on my mind besides sex and booze. Keitaro, you remember how you used to own Hinata House?

KEITARO (leaning on the countertop): How could I forget? Those were the best years of my life! You know, aside from all the beatings, bruisings, and internal bleedings, but the love was there...I think.

KITSUNE: So, you enjoyed it, right?

KEITARO: Oh, hell yeah. I’d do it again if I could.

Kitsune throws her beer over her shoulder and lunges forward, tugging at Keitaro’s shirt madly.

KITSUNE: Good, because I CAN’T STAND THIS JOB!

KEITARO: ...I had a feeling this was coming to that.

Kitsune lets go and paces around the kitchen, sweeping her arms dramatically for added emphasis.

KITSUNE: It’s pure torture! Cleaning the whole house from top to bottom, having to monitor everyone’s rents...and looking out for Su! Do you have any idea what it’s like to have to put up with her hanging over you when you’re trying to work?

KEITARO: Yes.

KITSUNE: Wow, that was a dumb question. Anyway, you’ve gotta help out a sister in need! You owe me one here, Urashima! If it wasn’t for me, you and Naru would never have gotten together!

KEITARO: Are you talking about the time you tried to force us to have sex just so you could videotape it?

Kitsune grabs Keitaro’s wrist and drags him back towards the door.

KITSUNE: I knew you’d see it my way, pal! Now come on, I gotta make an announcement.

The two reseat themselves at the table, where everyone is laughing at Naru’s continuation of the story. The laughter is broken by a metallic clanking sound. Kitsune is tapping a fork on the side of her beer can.

KITSUNE: Uh, excuse me, I hate to interrupt the story, but I need to say something before the alcohol makes me forget it again. Now I suppose you’re all wondering why I decided to hold this dinner tonight...

SU: Doesn’t matter to me, why should I object to free food?

KITSUNE: ...But I must admit I had some slightly ulterior motives. Me being the sneaky underhanded ***** that I am.

Everyone chuckles slightly.

KITSUNE: That wasn’t a joke. Now, you all undoubtedly remember that shortly after Julio and Romiet here got hitched in the shackles of holy matrimony...

She gestures to Keitaro and Naru.

KITSUNE: ...And since it was barely two weeks ago, I don’t see how you could have forgotten that before leaving for the honeymoon, Keitaro decided to put a good-sized chunk of time into starting a life with Naru and officially handed ownership of the Hinata House to me. At the time, I saw no long-term problems – I mean, Keitaro seemed to handle getting kicked in the face on a daily basis okay, right?

Everyone nods in assent and mutters their agreement.

KITSUNE: Hey, deadheads, THAT was the joke!...Anyway, it ultimately turned out to be a lot more than I bargained for. It especially took a turn for the difficult when a magazine called me back and agreed to publish one of my short stories. Yes, for those of you who don’t know, I’m a freelance writer in the off-hours.

EMA: What magazine was it?

KITSUNE (sheepishly): Uh... "Penthouse Japan".

MOTOKO: Saw that one comin’.

KITSUNE: And to accommodate this sudden change of schedule, I’ve decided to return to my humble life as a writer’s blocked boozehoundette and subsequently turn my landlording duties back over to the only man in my life who I ever had to force to touch my boobs, Keitaro Urashima.

She pulls the keys to the Hinata House’s front door out of her pocket and dangles them in front of Keitaro’s shocked face.

KITSUNE: So, Urashima, here’s the keys to your used girl’s dormitory. Try not to ding it up too much.

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To be continued...

J. B. Warner
04-03-2005, 11:29 PM
Somebody close this. I have apparently made a huge mistake.

Kury Wagner
04-03-2005, 11:39 PM
Somebody close this. I have apparently made a huge mistake.Mistake? By posting it? Nah, man. The Story Board doesn't get much traffic, you just need a wee bit of patience. I didn't even know you posted this story yet. :sweat: But now I know, and I read that first part, and I must say it's well written and you've done a very good job so far! I like it very much, and I am looking forward to reading more.

J. B. Warner
04-03-2005, 11:48 PM
I notice that, no matter what forum I'm on, my fanfictions only get replies after I threaten to remove them...and then only one person reads them.

Whatever, an audience of one is better than an audience of none. Here's the next installment.

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Fade to the next day. Another sweeping establishing shot of the Hinata House shows the sun rising over its panoramic facade. Inside, in the main lobby, Keitaro holds a mop and a bucket and looks down at the floor.

KEITARO: Okay, time to get down to business. With all the other girls off at Tokyo U for the day, I should have plenty of peace and quiet.

A voice behind Keitaro makes him jump. He whirls around to see Kitsune standing against the staircase.

KITSUNE: Not if I have anything to say about it!

KEITARO (startled): Kitsune! Jeez, I forgot you were still here. And speaking of which, I thought you were writing that short story for the magazine.

KITSUNE: Nah, I found a way around all the hard labor – I just took some dirty story off a no-name porno site somewhere and stuck my name on it. What’s the author gonna do, sue me?

Keitaro returns to the floor.

KEITARO: Yeah...let’s just say I’m not exactly surprised by what you said.

Kitsune takes a small box out of her apron pocket and plunks a cigarette in her mouth.

KEITARO: You smoke now? Since when?

KITSUNE: Oh hell no, I don’t smoke. I just walk around with the cigs in my mouth to make myself look cool. And besides, somebody’s gotta carry on Haruka’s legacy and whatnot.

KEITARO (still scrubbing): I bet this place was a load of laughs with you in charge.

KITSUNE: Yeah, but I still kept it in shape, I’ll tell you that much!

The banister that Kitsune is leaning on suddenly breaks and collapses. Kitsune gets up from the floor, slightly dazed, as Keitaro looks at her suspiciously.

KITSUNE: I swear that has never happened before.

Cut to an establishing shot of the hot springs, a few hours later. Keitaro’s shadow is seen on the other side of the wall, walking towards the door. He hesitates, then knocks.

KEITARO: Hello? Kitsune? Are you in there? ‘Cause if you are, you gotta tell me! Note how considerate I’m being of your personal space!

There is no reply. Keitaro slides the door open and peers around the edge. Kitsune charges by him out of the mist, a towel wrapped around herself.

KITSUNE: Well, geez, it’s not fun anymore if you’re gonna start knocking first!

Cut to the Hinata House roof, even later. Atop the section of the roof dubbed “Shinobu’s Special Place”, Keitaro bangs away with a hammer, repairing the shingles. Kitsune walks by on the laundry deck down below and looks up at him.

KITSUNE: Workin’ hard or hardly workin’?

KEITARO: I could ask you the same question. Kitsune, what kind of maintenance did you actually give the house while I was out the last two months?

KITSUNE: Oh, you know, the usual.

KEITARO: What’s “the usual”?

KITSUNE: You know, the usual! Stuff that the landlord usually does...why should you have to ask? You used to do the same thing!

Keitaro stops hammering and looks down at her.

KEITARO: You didn’t do anything, did you?

KITSUNE (not missing a beat): Not as such, no.

KEITARO: Well, you have to keep the place looking nice! Already today I’ve had to fix that banister you broke, repaired three rotting beams in that deck you’re standing on, scrubbed off the ring around the hot springs, found two uncleaned rat traps in the kitchen, and is it just me or did that hole in my ceiling get bigger?

Kitsune plunks another cigarette in her mouth.

KITSUNE: Oh, obviously everything’s gonna look bad if you only accentuate the negative. Now if you’ll excuse me, there are more pressing matters I must attend to.

KEITARO: You’re gonna help me with this?

KITSUNE: No, I’ve got 40,000 yen riding on Wiseass Jack in the fifth.

Kitsune walks off toward the direction of her room, humming “We’re In the Money”. Keitaro sighs and continues to pound nails into the roof.Cut to later still. Keitaro walks back through the lobby and reviews the work he’s done.

KEITARO: There, I’ve gone over the whole house. And it’s just barely 3:30 – plenty of time to relax with a good book and...

Suddenly the front doors slide open, and Motoko, Su, Shinobu, and Ema dash through the lobby, tossing their shoes behind them. When the dust settles, Keitaro sees the scuff marks their feet have left on the floor.

KEITARO: ...And a bottle of Turtle Wax.

He reaches off to the side of the screen and pulls the mop and bucket back over to himself just as Naru walks into the room, followed by Mutsumi and Tama-chan.

MUTSUMI: Well, Kei-kun, you certainly look like you’re having fun.

KEITARO: I don’t know what you’re basing that on, but no.

NARU: Have you been at this all day?

KEITARO: Yeah, this place really hit a slump once we left. But like I’ve always said, a landlord’s work is never done.

MUTSUMI: Not to hear Kitsune tell it.

NARU: Well, if it makes you feel any better. I’ve got a long night ahead of me too. Thirty test papers to grade, all of them in third-rate English. It’s no picnic being a teacher’s aide.

KEITARO: Hey, you keep at it and you’ll make teacher before you know it.

NARU: Thank you, Keitaro. One thing that can be said about you, you always know just what to say.

Kitsune walks through the scene nonchalantly, chewing on another cigarette.

KITSUNE: You’re gonna have to clean the upstairs hallway again – those birds in Su’s room got loose and gave it the statue treatment.

NARU (to Keitaro): I just wish I could say the same thing about Kitsune.

Cut to that evening. Keitaro and Naru are in their room again. While Naru grades her papers, Keitaro is hunched over at the table with a calculator and a sheet of paper. He mutters to himself as he punches in numbers.

KEITARO: Let’s see...three bottles of cleaner fluid per week...plus a roll of paper towels...nails, 900 yen per box...

NARU: I haven’t seen you that glued to a calculator since the 2000 Tokyo U entrance exam. What are you doing anyway?

KEITARO: Ever since Kitsune let Hinata House go the way she did, the cost of keeping the place in shape has gone up. I’m trying to determine how much it’ll cost per month.

NARU: And what have you come up with?

KEITARO: Well, when I compare the cost of supplies to the monthly income we get from the girls’ rent payments...

Keitaro punches in the final numbers, then looks back and forth from the calculator to the price sheet quickly.

KEITARO (shocked): According to this, we’re 520,000 yen in the red for this month alone!

Naru throws her tests aside and rushes over to Keitaro’s table. The papers scatter across the floor.

NARU: You’ve gotta be kidding! Maybe you miscalculated!

KEITARO: Well, you know, you taught me the math skills I used.

NARU: Okay then, yeah, we’re screwed.

Keitaro stands up and starts to pace by the window.

KEITARO: So what are we gonna do? If we can’t pay the cost of running this place, we’ll all be thrown out.

NARU: How about we raise the rents?

KEITARO: I don’t think so – if Motoko found out she had to pay more, she’d rip me in half.

Naru thinks for a moment.

NARU: Yeah, that’s true. Well, if we can’t increase the cost of living in the dorm, how about we take in more residents?

KEITARO: How? Girls only come here in the first place if they have nowhere else to go, and most school students still live with their parents.

NARU: Maybe if we made the place more appealing to outsiders?

Keitaro looks at Naru with a hint of disbelief.

KEITARO: We already house a swordswoman in law school, a hypersensitive chef, an ex-princess with an army of illegal robots, a middle schooler with an inferiority complex, an anemic who talks to turtles, and a compulsive gambler who’s hung over 16 hours a day. The only way we’re gonna raise this joint’s appeal is if we hand out eviction notices.

NARU: Well, I guess the only remaining course of action is to tell the girls to be more mindful of the costs they raise.

KEITARO (sighing): I guess that’d work. I might as well tell the girls to gather in the lobby for a house meeting. But I shudder having to tell Su not to buy as many bananas every week.

Cut to 15 minutes later. Shinobu, Motoko, Ema, Su, Mutsumi, Kitsune, Leon, and Tama-chan are all gathered on the couches and chairs in the lobby. Keitaro sits in an armchair, with Naru seated on the arm next to him.

KEITARO: All right, everyone, listen up. Within the confines of two weeks, somehow this place has gotten so run down that the cost of cleaning it everyday is exceeding your rents. So I took the only natural course of action.

SU (shocked): You didn’t raise our rents, did you?

Motoko, despite being dressed in a sweater and jeans, pulls a kendo shisui out of nowhere.

MOTOKO: I already pay 2500 yen per month and that’s the way it’s staying! So much as raise it by ten yen and I’ll unseam you from the nave to the chops!

Keitaro waves his arms nervously.

KEITARO: No, no, nothing like that! All I need you guys to do is be more mindful of the fact that it’s costing more to clean up around here and cut back on a few expenses.

He turns to face Shinobu.

KEITARO: For instance, Shinobu, when you’re done cooking dinner, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t always serve us with disposable plates and utensils.

Shinobu blushes slightly.

SHINOBU: Sorry, Sempai, but I wasn’t sure whether or not Kitsune’s “Spring Break Tijuana 1997” dishware would have been appropriate.

NARU: As far as we’re concerned it is. And Su, we’d prefer you stop constructing MechaTamagos, especially considering that you’re never gonna catch the damn turtle.

Su looks longingly at Tama-chan on Mutsumi’s shoulder.

SU: Ah, how true it is. He’s the road runner to my coyote.

MUTSUMI (to Tama-chan): Why, Tama-chan, I didn’t know you could run too!

KEITARO: And Kitsune, this may be a long shot, but perhaps you can stop dipping into the dorm’s budget to buy betting slips.

Kitsune opens her eyes and does a spit take, spraying beer in Motoko’s face. She exasperatedly wipes the beer out of her eyes.

KITSUNE: Hey, if one of those horses wins, you’re gonna change your tune, pal!

KEITARO: Trust me, Grandmother’s Little Helper isn’t gonna win anytime soon. Okay, girls, now that you’re more mindful of such concerns, let’s keep up the good work!

NARU: And my watch says it’s nine ‘o clock, so I’d advise anyone who has school in the morning to get in bed pronto.

The girls all file out of the lobby and make for the stairs. Keitaro suddenly thinks of something.

KEITARO: And if it’s not too much trouble, could you shut your lights off at 9:30 to save on the electrici...

Kitsune’s beer can comes flying into frame and pelts Keitaro in the forehead, causing him to fall off the chair onto the floor. He sits up and shakes his head.

KEITARO: Or not, that’s good too.

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To be continued...

SilverKnight
04-07-2005, 06:49 AM
I notice that, no matter what forum I'm on, my fanfictions only get replies after I threaten to remove them...and then only one person reads them.>flick< This may be a shot in the dark, here, but you might only get one reply because you threaten to remove them in the first place. Y'know, readers generally aren't fan of threats of any kind. Besides, patience is a virtue, and waiting a massive two days before attempting to guilt people into reading them by saying you've made 'a huge mistake', well, isn't.

By the way, what I've read thus far is pretty good, though I've never actually seen (and only distantly heard of) Love Hina. Please, continue. If it's really that important to hear someone say that.

J. B. Warner
04-07-2005, 06:37 PM
Sorry, I have a tendency to be impatient with my fanfictions. If I don't get immediate feedback, I feel invalidated. It's a sickness, really...well, I apologize if I sounded like a jerk. Here's the next installment.

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Cut to the next day. Keitaro is once again hard at work cleaning, this time washing the floor in the kitchen. He has a look of deep contempt on his face. Kitsune ambles in.

KITSUNE: How goes it, Urashima?

KEITARO: Very, very crappy! Did you girls even hear one word Naru and I said last night? Paper plates in the trash! Two new six-packs in the fridge, purchased with the dorm’s money!

He gets up to face Kitsune.

KEITARO: And who in the hell put bubble bath in the hot springs?

KITSUNE: That would be Su. Seems she felt it could use a touch of scented oil too.

Kitsune reaches for another cigarette.

KITSUNE: Oh, I hope you don’t mind, but I dipped into the dorm’s savings just a smidgen to buy myself some more packs. You can make 5,000 yen before the next rent collection, right?

Keitaro growls and throws his rag into the kitchen sink.
Cut to later that afternoon. Keitaro and Naru are walking together beneath the cherry blossoms outside Hinata House.

KEITARO: I don’t know what I’m gonna do. Those girls don’t listen to a damn word you tell ‘em! And we’re still gettin’ deeper in the hole!

NARU: Well, if worse comes to worst, you can always merge with a big name hotel and become a subsidiary.

Keitaro stops dead in his tracks.

KEITARO: What did you say?

NARU: I said that if worse comes to worst, you can become a subsidiary to a bigger hotel chain.

Keitaro suddenly hugs Naru.

KEITARO: Naru, honey, you are a genius! That is the greatest idea I’ve ever heard!

NARU: Hang on, now, I wasn’t serious! I mean, if we were to become a subsidiary, you wouldn’t be in charge anymore! Whoever owns the chain would have control.

KEITARO: Not so – don’t forget that in my grandmother’s official contract, she’s got me listed as the owner of the house regardless of whether or not we’re purchased by a larger company! Even if some big hotel chain adds new employees, I’d still be the manager!

NARU: Oh, well, if that’s the case, then sure!

Keitaro claps his hands together.

KEITARO: Okay, first order of business is to announce that we’re up for grabs.

NARU: To the phone book!

Both of them run off.
Cut to Keitaro and Naru’s room. A brief montage shows them continually leafing through the phone book and calling numerous Japanese hotel chains by way of cell phone.

Music cue: “I’m Feelin’ Alright” by Joe Cocker

KEITARO: Hello, is this Miyazaki Hotels, Inc.? I’d like to speak to the C.E.O.

NARU: Yes, hello, Mr. Kinebuchi? My name is Naru Narusegawa, I represent the Hinata House girls’ dormitory in the Kanagawa prefecture...

KEITARO: We’re very spacious and accommodating, and we’ve got plenty of rooms...um, well, not quite, but we can certainly contact a construction crew...

NARU: No, no, see, the hot springs are kinda the reason the place was built, I don’t think we can put more rooms in their place.

KEITARO: Wait...well, the way it works is that girls come in of their own free will, and...um, see, I doubt too many of our current residents would appreciate us going coed...

NARU: We have excellent food services! We don’t need a new kitchen crew!...Yeah, so what if we only have one person? She’s better than anybody else I’ve seen!

KEITARO: All right, I understand...yes, okay...goodbye. (redialing) Hello, is this the headquarters of Osaka Hotels and Suites? I’d like to speak to the C.E.O.

NARU: Yeah, well, maybe I do have a problem with that! Now either you listen to what I have to say or else...hello? Hello?

KEITARO: Yes, I understand we’re not technically a hotel...how is there such a big difference?...Okay, now that’s just plain sexist!...It is so!

NARU: Um, Hinata House. You’ve heard of us?...Uh, yes, I suppose we are the place with the kendo girl and the giant robots...really, nationwide news and everything? I didn’t think the explosions were that big.

KEITARO: Well, people don’t technically have to treat it as a hotel, you could, you know, just own it...Because of the prestige!...That is so worth something!

NARU: But I can assure you, nobody would be in danger around here! We’re about five minutes from the hospital anyway so...hello?

KEITARO: Okay, how’s this – we construct an addendum on the dorm where you can put hotel rooms...regular-sized, capsules, I don’t care!...Oh, geez, ballpark? I think maybe about twenty...um, you still there?

Keitaro reaches the bottom of the phone book listings for hotel chains. Both he and Naru flip their cell phones shut and look at each other.

End music cue.

KEITARO, NARU (in unison): We’re hosed.

Cut to a few minutes later, in the lobby. Keitaro lounges on the couch, scanning the phone book for any additional hotel chains. Naru paces around nervously.

NARU: I don’t believe it. Twelve major hotel chains in the Kanagawa prefecture and not one of them wants us! It’s ‘cause of this damned reputation! Why do Motoko and Su have to keep blowing things up?

KEITARO: And none of the major ones elsewhere in Japan were anything to write home about either.

NARU: Well, that’s it – we’re dead. Kitsune’s complete lack of managerial skills has lost us Hinata House! I rue the day I ever befriended that *****! Only people lazier than her are middle-class Americans.

A look of hope suddenly crosses Keitaro’s face.

KEITARO: American...that’s it!

Keitaro jumps to his feet.

KEITARO: Why don’t we offer the dorm to an American hotel? We’ll be part of an overseas merger!

NARU: Hey...hey, that could work! America’s got plenty of hotels – Motel 6, Super 8, ones that don’t have numbers...

KEITARO: I mean a big name hotel chain, like Ramada or Holiday Inn. Those kinds of hotels where you don’t ask for chocolate on your pillow – they just come right out and give it to you!

NARU: Yeah, where you get all the cable channels for free, even the smutty ones!

KEITARO: There must be at least one that would want us! We’ve gotta put out e-mails!

NARU: To the Internet!

Keitaro looks at Naru strangely.

KEITARO: What is it with you and that superhero stance?

NARU: I’ve been hangin’ around Su too long.

Fade to the next day. Another establishing shot of the Hinata House. Keitaro and Naru walk down the hall to the hot springs, both of them with great smiles on their faces. Naru puts out her arm and stops Keitaro short as they approach the door.

NARU: Oh, I’ll handle this one.

Naru flings the door to the hot springs open as Keitaro turns away and covers his eyes.

NARU: Hey, guys, guess –

Kitsune, Shinobu, Su, Ema, Mutsumi, and Motoko, all of them submerged from the shoulders down, suddenly look up and scream in alarm. In one swift movement, Kitsune, Su, and Motoko leap out of the water, conceal themselves with towels, and deliver a collective flying kick to Naru’s nose. Naru goes flying backwards across the hall, her head embedding in the wall. The girls suddenly compose themselves.

MOTOKO: Naru! Oh my God, I’m sorry! We thought you were him!

SU: Force o’ habit, you know how it is.

Naru shakily stands up, holding the wall for support, and with her other hand clutches her nose, which is bleeding.

NARU: Yeah, see, now I know why it took so long for Keitaro and me to click.

KEITARO: If you’re all quite done killing my wife, I was going to say that you have a dorm resident meeting to attend in the lobby.

KITSUNE: Hey, you don’t get to stand around while we’re only wearing towels!

Kitsune delivers a swift punch to Keitaro’s left eye; Keitaro keels over and hits the floor with a thump. Kitsune flexes her wrist.

KITSUNE: Still got it.

Cut to the lobby. Once again, the girls are seated on the couch and chairs. Keitaro and Naru stand before them, a mound of wrapped gifts at their feet.

KEITARO: I’d like to thank you all for the years of support and tolerance you’ve given me...

MUTSUMI: That’s kind of ironic, considering what just happened.

KEITARO: And as a token of my gratitude, I got you all a few gifts.

SU (suddenly energetic): Ooh, gifties! Whadja get me, whadja get me?

NARU: In good time. First up is Shinobu.

Keitaro hands Shinobu a present. She tears back the wrapping and sees that her gift is a book.

SHINOBU: “1001 Recipes for the Hibachi”! Oh, Sempai, you know me too darn well.

Keitaro continues to hand out gifts to each of the girls in turn. Motoko and Su open their boxes.

MOTOKO: Why, it’s...a 5,000-yen gift certificate to “Victoria’s Secret”. You know, the old me would have impaled you, but this is nice.

SU (ecstatic): BANANAS! Keitaro, you’ll always be my favoritest person!

KEITARO: Yeah... Kitsune, this is for you.

Kitsune takes her large present and rips off the paper, then gasps happily.

KITSUNE: German-imported beer! Lottery tickets! Betting slips! Cash!

Kitsune suddenly leaps up and hugs Keitaro.

KITSUNE: I feel closer to you at this moment than ever before.

NARU: Ema, we knew exactly what you wanted.

Ema opens her gift.

EMA: A push-up training bra? Gee, thanks! I’ve been hinting to my parents that I wanted one of these, but they wouldn’t catch on.

Keitaro pushes forward a large and very heavy box.

KEITARO: And for you, Mutsumi.

Mutsumi tears back the paper on her gift.

MUTSUMI (overjoyed): Oh me, oh my, a new kotatsu? Kei-kun, than you so much! First thing I do tomorrow, I’m taking out an insurance policy on this one!

Kitsune pops a can off her new six-pack and proceeds to drink. She stops in mid-sip and eyes Keitaro suspiciously.

KITSUNE: HEY! Hold on a ******* minute here! Why the hell are you bein’ so nice to us?

KEITARO: Because you guys have taken me under your collective metaphorical wings and I want to thank you for it.

KITSUNE: Oh, don’t gimme that, you’re up to something.

SHINOBU: Kitsune, not everything a person does has to have ulterior motives.

The other girls nod in general assent.

MUTSUMI: Exactly.

EMA: Good point.

SU: I’ve got bananas!

KEITARO: Although, while we’re all here and in a good mood, Naru and I have an announcement to make.

Motoko slaps her forehead.

MOTOKO: Oh my God, she’s pregnant.

SU: You should name it Xavier! I’ve always liked that name!

NARU: No, no, it’s much happier news. Keitaro?

Keitaro clears his throat.

KEITARO: I sold the Hinata House!

Cut to an exterior shot of the dorm. The girls’ collective scream sends birds scattering from the cherry blossom trees.

KITSUNE, SHINOBU, SU, MOTOKO, EMA, MUTSUMI (in unison): YOU DID WHAT?!?!?

Cut back to the lobby. Kitsune crushes her beer can in her hand as Motoko again pulls a shisui out of nowhere, leaps behind Keitaro, holds his arms behind his back, and puts the blade to his throat.

MOTOKO: Amazing how in a matter of two nanoseconds, I instantly lost all concern for whether or not you live or die!

SHINOBU (virtually speechless): Sempai, what...why did you...

SU: I got dibs on his head!

NARU: Guys! Control yourselves! It’s not as bad as you think!

KITSUNE: The hell it ain’t! I’m not gonna be pushed around by some stuffy new owner! Now hold the jerk still so I can get a good shot at his vitals!

KEITARO (slightly strangled): Listen, let me explain! I haven’t actually “sold” the place yet, and it’s technically not even a sale!

Motoko loosens her grip and lowers her sword.

MOTOKO: Go on...

KEITARO (rubbing his neck): Well, see, since cutting back on expenses wasn’t working, we decided to take a different route. Naru and I have shopped the Hinata House around to a couple of big name hotel chains to see if any of them would take us in as a subsidiary. Now, that means that you’d still have me as landlord and stuff, but we’d get the additional profits that come from the bigger chain.

EMA: Yeah, but is it really necessary?

KEITARO: Of course! We could use the extra revenue that a merger would bring. We’d get more business and we’d have plenty of extra cash for maintenance. I mean, honestly, Kitsune, I don’t know what you’ve done in my absence but this place is falling apart.

KITSUNE: It is not!

Creaking is heard beneath Kitsune’s feet. Suddenly the floorboards give way and Kitsune falls through the floor, landing in the basement with a crash. She calls up from below.

KITSUNE: That had nothing to do with the floor, I’m probably just fat!

KEITARO: But the merger isn’t a sure thing yet. I talked to this big chain that’s located in America, and Naru and I need to go there ourselves to talk to the C.E.O. face to face in order to seal the deal.

MUTSUMI: So we’re going on a vacation?

NARU: No, no, see, there’s no “we”, it’s just...

SHINOBU: You know, I haven’t been to America before, it seems like a nice place...

KEITARO: Well, see, the thing is, only Naru and I really have to...

SU (jumping to her feet): Road trip!

KEITARO: First of all, we’d be taking a plane, and second, YOU GUYS AREN’T GOING!

Su sits back down.

SU (composed): I know, I just like saying that.

NARU: Then it's settled. We're going to leave tomorrow. And this time we're leaving the house in the care of...uh, I dunno, Shinobu, I guess.

Shinobu blushes slightly.

SHINOBU: Oh, jeez, are you sure?

The basement door slides open and Kitsune, slightly disheveled, stumbles out, She holds a Rubik’s Cube in one hand.

KITSUNE: Hey, look what I found in the basement! I didn’t know we had one of these.

KEITARO (to Shinobu): You’ve gotta be better than the alternative.

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To be continued...