-Love that will not die- (Poem)

[Cogliostro]

It's a poem I did years ago, I know it could use some changes and is a little rough, but thought I would post it and see what others thought. I've had people interpret the poem telling about something differently then what I wrote it about (which is probably obvious) but that's what poems are about interpretation. Please tell me what you think both positive and negative and tell me what you think it is about.


-Love that will not die-
She dances with death, she's so alone
Crying as she does, her sad tears beg for love to wipe them away
The dance never finishes, she's again on her own
Always knowing she can pick it back up another day

She tries so hard with her smile she fakes that are so hollow
Each day adds more sorrow, misleading with hope that lies
Living it again tomorrow is such a hard pill for her to swallow
While waiting for love to run out of all it's disguies

"Maybe tomorrow this grey day will open to a blue sky"
She thinks, "Love can't die but I haven't any, so I can."
"Is happiness just a lie? Should I keep going? Should I try?
"All I want and need is love in the warm arms of a man"

Death holds her close as they slow dance once again
She embraces him and smiles as a teardrop crawls from her eye
Yet another of many before that won't be stopped
Gracefuly it drops from her chin
As she daydreams of a time when...she has..."Love that will not die"

[Neko Konneko]

... ... ... wow that was reeeeeeeeaaaaaallllllyyyyyy powerful in my mind! If you have any other poems you should defently post them cause I will read them for sure!!! I am in total awe. If you want to read any of my poems the thread is "These Poems" but please post more.

[Cogliostro]

... ... ... wow that was reeeeeeeeaaaaaallllllyyyyyy powerful in my mind! If you have any other poems you should defently post them cause I will read them for sure!!! I am in total awe. If you want to read any of my poems the thread is "These Poems" but please post more.Thank you for the nice comments. I have many poems, but hardly ever show them. I read your poem 'Dark Twilight Storm' before I posted my poem, but did not get a chance to post because I had to get offline. I like it, it's about a girl fighting sadness right?. I really like the title, it fits rather well. Keep posting your poems if you have more and I might post another sometime.

[DarkAngel]

Nice, Cogliostro. I particularly liked the lines:

Each day adds more sorrow, misleading with hope that lies
and
Yet another of many before that won't be stopped

I like the sound and flow. That's one aspect that always jumps out at me with poetry. I'm not sure what to point out as a negative. Poetry has always seemed so open to me: one can do anything, use any form, with no clear sense of correct structure or any bounds. And that's always scared me away as far as writing poems.

As for what its about... I'll admit I'm almost a little embarrassed to try since I feel like I'm stating the obvious and not finding something deeper. But, I see someone embracing death as a way out of a life lacking love and filled only with loneliness. Suicide possibly, though it seems more like death from a broken heart.

[Cogliostro]

Nice, Cogliostro. I particularly liked the lines:

Each day adds more sorrow, misleading with hope that lies
and
Yet another of many before that won't be stopped

I like the sound and flow. That's one aspect that always jumps out at me with poetry. I'm not sure what to point out as a negative. Poetry has always seemed so open to me: one can do anything, use any form, with no clear sense of correct structure or any bounds. And that's always scared me away as far as writing poems.

As for what its about... I'll admit I'm almost a little embarrassed to try since I feel like I'm stating the obvious and not finding something deeper. But, I see someone embracing death as a way out of a life lacking love and filled only with loneliness. Suicide possibly, though it seems more like death from a broken heart.
Thanks for the comments :D You are pretty much right about what I intended it to be about, I wrote it about a girl that was very lonely and depressed in life and the dancing with death for me as the writer meant she was doing self-destructive things like cutting, drugs, drinking and so on and I don't know if I made it clear in the poem but at the end she just gives up and accepts her lonliness and dances with death once more (kills herself), crying and dreaming of the love she longed for as she fades away.

[Mystique]

That was really good, and I enjoyed reading it. I think it is definately a poem that people can relate to. :)

[Kylewayne]

Wow! That poem pâcked quit a punch. It was so moving =) Keep it up, I enjoyed reading it :)