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View Full Version : The new Ravenger and teen titan recrute



Nudianunu
02-10-2005, 11:18 PM
The story am about to tell you is about a young girl 14 Rose Wilson who became the 4th Ravenger. This is my first fan fic and of course i was prepared so before i can tell u the story i must show u so the pic. of her is at
http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/15042024 . I DO NOT OWN THE TITANS AND MY STORY MAY NOT MATCH UP W/ THE COMICS IN EXACTLY.

Epiolgy
from Rose's point of view.
I lay sleeping in my bed, dreaming off. Then suddenly I was awoken by my mother it was about dawn, she told me to round up our 2nd guest room that we were having company. Of course my mother came from wealth, I had never met my father and that is the way my mother wanted it. I went down stairs and set up the guest bedroom then i saw our butler's carry him in, he was wounded very badly. The first thing i noticed was his hair. It was nautrally white. I too had this strange characteristic which not people have.
" Rose, this is our guest hhe will be staying here for a while, u best be going to bed swety it is very late."
'Okay mom......... good night .... SIR" i said, and he just looked at me and did not respond back he just stared.
the next day
I was appointed to help me mother withth injured man. So in the moring she asked me to give him his breakfest in his room. As i approched i got nervous. I stood in the door way the man seemed to be practicing some kind marshall arts and i stood watching him when his wound cought up to him and he fell to the floor. He got up almost instantly.
"Yes, dear" he said
" i ..... um i have.. uh your meal SIR"
" Put it on the bed, it is u i am more interested in learning about, how old r u?"
"... 14"
We spoke more and more about more subjects. Then our conversation ended.
later
It was late and i could not rest. I thought i would go out for some fresh air, our backyard had a concrete slab which i practiced my Marshall Arts. I was practcing my marshall arts with a lead pole.
"Hello dear" said Sir
" what r u doin uo so late sir?" i said
" I could not sleep" he said
"me neither"
Then he moved towards the barrells where i had nermorous sticks of leads and bamboo sticks. He impressed me with his ability. Suddenly somthing weird happened i could not explain it, i could see his next move exactly what he was going to do so i could block it in a heartbeat. We battled for about a hour when we were both exhausted we called it a night but the night was far from over. I lay in my bed asleep when i hear somthing crash though the window. I open my eyes to see a man in red suite i recongize him i saw him on the new he calls himself the Ravenger.
"You're coming with me!"
"NOOO!" I said he grabbed me by the foot and took me away
"DON'T EVEN BOTHER trying to get away!"
"MOM!" I said and suddenly he sprayed a mist then i fell uncauntious.
"what happened?" i said
" U are at my liar"
"you u are a bad guy WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH ME!?"
"simple you know that man that i s staying at your house?"
"yes his name is ........."
"SLADE .. or slade wilson"
"what? .... but that would mean that he was my ..."
"he is your father Rose!"
"what?"
" He is my half brother and i am killing any one who is even close to him so i found the connection to u and you are next."
"How long has it been since you took me?"
" almost one day know. Ohh and by the way your mother called begging me to leave you alone and that she will pay any price, but i don't want any money i want to see Slade hurt mentally"
"no, just please leave..." i said and he came towards me with a sword and put it to my neck.
"goodb.... what?"
then suddenly a search and resue team and swat police came rushing in, and later at his trial he was sentenced to death.
Then they informed me that my mother was dead. They had no clue where my farther was. I felt abandoned. They told me that i was going to be put in custody of some one. i asked and asked who they never told me. They told me that i was going to Jump City. I decided to get some rest on the long trip there.
"Rose .. Rose wake up you're here at your new home."
I opened my eyes to see the famous Teen Titans Tower or 'my new home.'

Basing on my feed back i will or will not make a new chapter (most likely yes). Chapter one will be about Rose moving in with the titans and helping them to defeat villians and emotional conflicts.

The_NewCatwoman
02-11-2005, 02:35 AM
I think the word you were looking for is "epilogue" and that generally comes at the end of the story. A prologue however would explain events prior to the actual story taking place.

I like your thought process were language is concerned. You have an eye for detail, unfortunately your puncuation and spelling effectively distract from that merit. Please consider typing in Microsoft Word if you have it and keeping a dictionary nearby if you can. If you don't have your own dictionary you can find one here:

http://encarta.msn.com/encnet/features/dictionary/dictionaryhome.aspx

This is my best friend where writing is concerned.

Microsoft Word will help with your grammar by calling attention to errors in your puncuation. I cannot stress how important that is, it makes the readers job that much easier and they can appreciate your story that much better.

tNC