How do you stop nightmares? (Please help.)

[Fone Bone]

I have been having a rough few days. I'm exhausted, scared, upset and stressed. Every time I go to sleep it seems like I have a nightmare. I wake up in the middle of the night screaming. I don't want to go into what they are because 1. You would probably think I'm crazy for the things I worry about and 2. I don't want to think about them any more than I have to.

I am in the middle of getting a new therapist but until then I'm on my own. I don't want to self medicate either.

I am terrified if the neighbors keep hearing me scream in the middle of the night they'll call the police and I'll go to jail.

You've probably noticed I've been either flaky or upset these past few days and for that I apologize. But if anyone knows ANY methods for sleeping soundly that don't involve drugs I would be very grateful. I'm a nervous wreck.

[Kury Wagner]

I have been having a rough few days. I'm exhausted, scared, upset and stressed. Every time I go to sleep it seems like I have a nightmare. I wake up in the middle of the night screaming. I don't want to go into what they are because 1. You would probably think I'm crazy for the things I worry about and 2. I don't want to think about them any more than I have to.

I am in the middle of getting a new therapist but until then I'm on my own. I don't want to self medicate either.

I am terrified if the neighbors keep hearing me scream in the middle of the night they'll call the police and I'll go to jail.

You've probably noticed I've been either flaky or upset these past few days and for that I apologize. But if anyone knows ANY methods for sleeping soundly that don't involve drugs I would be very grateful. I'm a nervous wreck.
Unfortunately dude, I don't think there is anything other than getting to the root of the nightmares themselves. :sad: Did you recently get mugged, or something happen that was tramatic? There's obviously something in your subconscious that is plaguing you. :shrug:

[Fone Bone]

Unfortunately dude, I don't think there is anything other than getting to the root of the nightmares themselves. :sad: Did you recently get mugged, or something happen that was tramatic? There's obviously something in your subconscious that is plaguing you. :shrug:I was in a state hospital for four years and I flash back to that quite frequently even though I've been out for a few years. I am TERRIFIED of being locked up. I am shaking as I write this.

[Lord Dalek]

Warm milk. Try it.

[Fone Bone]

Warm milk. Try it.What temperature? Do you heat it on the stove or in the microwave?

[Lord Dalek]

What temperature? Do you heat it on the stove or in the microwave?On the stove. Just till it starts steaming, don't let it boil. It's great for the nerves.

[Kury Wagner]

I was in a state hospital for four years and I flash back to that quite frequently even though I've been out for a few years. I am TERRIFIED of being locked up. I am shaking as I write this.
That's probably the cause of your nightmares. :sad:

[murmur]

I assure you that I, at least, wouldn't think you were crazy even if you thought the cookie monster was out to get you. We all have irrational fears and the content of our dreams, good and bad, are based on emotion at least as much as they are based on thought. The bad news is that you most likely will indeed have to think about these fears. The more you bring them into your concious thought the less they will be buried in your unconcious, where of course your dreams dwell, at least in large part.

It is, OTOH possible that there is a physical cause for your recent nightmare outbreak. Fevers, for example, can make your mind race in most unpleasent ways, sleeping or waking. Think about what has happened to you in the last week. Were there any major stressors that are far beyond what you normally deal with? Or anything that you want to deny as much as you can, again more than you normally do? If the answer is a very definite "yes" than dealing with your problems is probably the best way to get better faster. If instead, the problems that you are dealing with now aren't any worse than those you normally deal with, they just feel worse, you should think about seeing a physician as well as a new shrink. This isn't a professional opinion or anything, but a lot of people, myself included, have a lot of phychological difficulties when they catch a virus, often even before they get physical symptoms.

Anyway, regardless of what's causing your nightmares, it sounds like you worry a lot more of what other people think than you have to. There is no way that you will go to jail for screaming. If anyone made a noise complaint to the police (which someone would probably only do if you literally didn't stop for more than like ten minutes straight), the worst that would happen is the cops would show and ask if you were okay and if you weren't they would offer to take you to a hospital (you would literally have to be out of control for them to take you by force and even then, you'd go to an emergency ward not jail and would go home as soon as you were better). Trust me, I know.

I hope you get better!

EDIT: Man, I wish I didn't take so long to write my response that I missed the other responses. I may as well volunteer something about myself to help put you at ease. I was in a mental ward when I was in my adolescence, not for as long, but also not by choice. I recovered. In the last year, I have had a couple nervous breaks, one of which put me in the emergency mental ward. I admit it was hell but it literally lasted only a day. In fact, they released another guy who was there who was far worse than me; he was paranoid delusional possibly even schitzophrenic but as long as you don't attack anybody you're fine. Nervous disorders are more common than you might think. Anyway, is there anything recent that you think might have triggered your old fears to resurface?

[Fone Bone]

I assure you that I, at least, wouldn't think you were crazy even if you thought the cookie monster was out to get you. We all have irrational fears and the content of our dreams, good and bad, are based on emotion at least as much as they are based on thought. The bad news is that you most likely will indeed have to think about these fears. The more you bring them into your concious thought the less they will be buried in your unconcious, where of course your dreams dwell, at least in large part.

It is, OTOH possible that there is a physical cause for your recent nightmare outbreak. Fevers, for example, can make your mind race in most unpleasent ways, sleeping or waking. Think about what has happened to you in the last week. Were there any major stressors that are far beyond what you normally deal with? Or anything that you want to deny as much as you can, again more than you normally do? If the answer is a very definite "yes" than dealing with your problems is probably the best way to get better faster. If instead, the problems that you are dealing with now aren't any worse than those you normally deal with, they just feel worse, you should think about seeing a physician as well as a new shrink. This isn't a professional opinion or anything, but a lot of people, myself included, have a lot of phychological difficulties when they catch a virus, often even before they get physical symptoms.

Anyway, regardless of what's causing your nightmares, it sounds like you worry a lot more of what other people think than you have to. There is no way that you will go to jail for screaming. If anyone made a noise complaint to the police (which someone would probably only do if you literally didn't stop for more than like ten minutes straight), the worst that would happen is the cops would show and ask if you were okay and if you weren't they would offer to take you to a hospital (you would literally have to be out of control for them to take you by force and even then, you'd go to an emergency ward not jail and would go home as soon as you were better). Trust me, I know.

I hope you get better!I've have people pull out a section 12 on me (meaning that I am no longer fit to make my own descisions) on MANY occasions when I didn't need it. I was crying and sobbing on September 11, 2001 and the police were called from my group home and they took me to the hospital without my consent. The head staff had a section twelve filled out on me and I had to go with the police. Thank God I live on my own now.

So basically, I have nightmares of going to the hospital. I wake up screaming and that just worries me that I WILL go which in turn feeds my nightmare. It's a never ending loop.

Lord Dalek, I tried some warm milk and it calmed me. I'll try some more before I go to sleep.

Edit: I've been paranoid about people being mad at me for the past few days. I think it was because my mom always seems so disappointed in me recently.

[Kenshin]

i agree it is probably something on your mind that is causing the nightmares... i had this happen to me, i kept dreaming that the plague came back and it was killing all my friends and family and everybody i cared about, it was driving me nuts! it was due to the fact that i was in the hospital (i hate hospitals!) for like 2 days and i saw alot of sick people that made me sad. so basically its probably something you either saw or went through in the past even if you dont remember it.

[Rune]

I'm really sorry you're going through this, it must be incredibly draining for you but you have to remember that its just a phase and that no matter how tough it is it will pass, try and hold on to that whenever it gets on top of you, I know it sounds easy for me to say it but it will work for you if you stay on top if it.

Also though you live alone you're not alone, we're all here to help & support you in any way we can. Dalek is right about the warm milk, it can help relax you as will something like lavender oil or even lavender flowers which you can sprinkle around the room / pillow. If you are having the bad dreams more or less the same time every night it might also help you to break the pattern, I know its not quite the same but when they were younger my kids had 'night terrors' which meant they woke up the same time each night crying over something that scared them that they couldn't recall - the body and mind get into a routine apparently so to stop it you break the routine, change your bedtime, change where you sleep, even if its something as small as putting the pillow up the other end of the bed, it might help. I woke my kids up a little while before the 'night terrors' usually started and it helped break the cycle in the end. You could also listen to a relaxation tape of some kind.

I hope you get a good sleep tonight, thinking positively about sleeping well will also help you. You'll get through this, i know you will.

[murmur]

I've have people pull out a section 12 on me (meaning that I am no longer fit to make my own descisions) on MANY occasions when I didn't need it. I was crying and sobbing on September 11, 2001 and the police were called from my group home and they took me to the hospital without my consent. The head staff had a section twelve filled out on me and I had to go with the police. Thank God I live on my own now.
Please forgive me, I was projecting too much of my own experience on you. OTOH, I'm pretty darn sure that your experiences will be better now that you are on your own. It really is a whole different ball game. Your rights are your own.


Edit: I've been paranoid about people being mad at me for the past few days. I think it was because my mom always seems so disappointed in me recently.That's definitely possible. Like you said, thank god you live on your own! I know it's a psychological cliche, but mothers really do have that special emotional power to drive us nuts!

[Caffeine King]

Your subconcious is what makes your dreams and is what you really think but you don't think on your concious and that's you have whatever is on your subconcious in your dreams...I think. :sweat:

I don't think I've ever had a nightmare about something that has actually happened to me in real life.

Hope those nightmares stop... :sad:

[Fone Bone]

I'm really sorry you're going through this, it must be incredibly draining for you but you have to remember that its just a phase and that no matter how tough it is it will pass, try and hold on to that whenever it gets on top of you, I know it sounds easy for me to say it but it will work for you if you stay on top if it.

Also though you live alone you're not alone, we're all here to help & support you in any way we can. Dalek is right about the warm milk, it can help relax you as will something like lavender oil or even lavender flowers which you can sprinkle around the room / pillow. If you are having the bad dreams more or less the same time every night it might also help you to break the pattern, I know its not quite the same but when they were younger my kids had 'night terrors' which meant they woke up the same time each night crying over something that scared them that they couldn't recall - the body and mind get into a routine apparently so to stop it you break the routine, change your bedtime, change where you sleep, even if its something as small as putting the pillow up the other end of the bed, it might help. I woke my kids up a little while before the 'night terrors' usually started and it helped break the cycle in the end. You could also listen to a relaxation tape of some kind.

I hope you get a good sleep tonight, thinking positively about sleeping well will also help you. You'll get through this, i know you will.I don't own any lavenders. I'll try going to sleep at 11 O'Clock since recently I've been either going to bed really early or really late.

I know it will pass. That is part of the reason I am not suicidal right now. The problem is every time it goes away it comes back worse than ever.

Thank you for the kind words.

murmur, I didn't find you projecting AT ALL. The only way to help other people is to relate your own life experiences and they take from it what they can. Personally, I've found your story comforting to know I'm not alone. Thank you.

Thank you as well Caffiene King, Kurt Wagner, and screwball.

[Chime]

i used to have horrible and hideous nightmares all the time. you see, i suffer from arachnophobia....and im afraid of spiders, so i would dream about spiders. im getting over my fear now, a bit. my advice:


1) Dot not let your fear run your life. always remember, whatever is happening will pass. when i am scared, i shut out the current happenings and dream about the future, or just let my mind wander.

2) when do you have these nightmares? if it's at night, try to become more familiar with the dark. take walks at night and breathe the cool evening air to quiet your frazzled brain.

3) hot soup and herb tea. lotsesandlotses of tea. broth is good, too.

4) lose yourself in a book while listening to soothing music. i suggest doing both at once, because i know how silence can seem to press around so close. read, get an interesting book that will keep you occupied and keep your mind from going back to the visions from your nightmares. read until you can't keep your eyes open anymore, then try sleeping again.

5) chocolate

6) sleep with a night-light. a night-light can help you to feel less alone. as humans, we are naturally drawn to light. it comforts us.

7) no late-night snacks. even if you are hungry right before you go to sleep, unless the hunger is severe, wait until morning.

8) this sounds stupid, but do you know how to meditate? try that. get comfortable, and then concentrate on relaxing your muscles, one at a time. start with your hands and legs, then your shoulders, then your neck, etc.(not necessarily in that order) it gets easier with practice. there is a state of mind in meditation where you cannot feel any part of your body. you feel warm and comfortable, but you cannot tell where your limbs are, and your mind feels kind of floaty and heavy, like warm water.

9) lay off of the horror movies.

10) get plenty of exercise during the day, so that you are tired enough to sleep the whole night through.

11) join a body image group, or start one yourself. a body image group is a place where people can talk about how they feel about their bodies and anything else that is bothering them. these groups make you feel accepted and can help to build your self confidence

12) do something satisfactory, like community service, so that when you ponder your existance, you will know that you are doing something worthwhile. this can help your sleep, and by keeping busy, you take your mind off of things.

if i think of any more, i'll let you know. good luck!


and remember--you have my support, if no one else's, but i know that there are more people supporting you than you might think. ^^

[cross blues]

6) sleep with a night-light. a night-light can help you to feel less alone. as humans, we are naturally drawn to light. it comforts us.

7) no late-night snacks. even if you are hungry right before you go to sleep, unless the hunger is severe, wait until morning.

10) get plenty of exercise during the day, so that you are tired enough to sleep the whole night through.

and remember--you have my support, if no one else's, but i know that there are more people supporting you than you might think. ^^another suggestion for better sleep: NO caffeine whatsoever.

these are suggestions I got from both my doctor and my psychologist. I know for a fact (from experience) that they will help you sleep better. unfortunately, I'm not educated enough to give any advice about your nightmares except this: your dreams come from your own mind. everything that happens is happening inside your head. so if you have enough will to control it, you might be able to. you can and will beat this.

[Fone Bone]

i used to have horrible and hideous nightmares all the time. you see, i suffer from arachnophobia....and im afraid of spiders, so i would dream about spiders. im getting over my fear now, a bit. my advice:


1) Dot not let your fear run your life. always remember, whatever is happening will pass. when i am scared, i shut out the current happenings and dream about the future, or just let my mind wander.

2) when do you have these nightmares? if it's at night, try to become more familiar with the dark. take walks at night and breathe the cool evening air to quiet your frazzled brain.

3) hot soup and herb tea. lotsesandlotses of tea. broth is good, too.

4) lose yourself in a book while listening to soothing music. i suggest doing both at once, because i know how silence can seem to press around so close. read, get an interesting book that will keep you occupied and keep your mind from going back to the visions from your nightmares. read until you can't keep your eyes open anymore, then try sleeping again.

5) chocolate

6) sleep with a night-light. a night-light can help you to feel less alone. as humans, we are naturally drawn to light. it comforts us.

7) no late-night snacks. even if you are hungry right before you go to sleep, unless the hunger is severe, wait until morning.

8) this sounds stupid, but do you know how to meditate? try that. get comfortable, and then concentrate on relaxing your muscles, one at a time. start with your hands and legs, then your shoulders, then your neck, etc.(not necessarily in that order) it gets easier with practice. there is a state of mind in meditation where you cannot feel any part of your body. you feel warm and comfortable, but you cannot tell where your limbs are, and your mind feels kind of floaty and heavy, like warm water.

9) lay off of the horror movies.

10) get plenty of exercise during the day, so that you are tired enough to sleep the whole night through.

11) join a body image group, or start one yourself. a body image group is a place where people can talk about how they feel about their bodies and anything else that is bothering them. these groups make you feel accepted and can help to build your self confidence

12) do something satisfactory, like community service, so that when you ponder your existance, you will know that you are doing something worthwhile. this can help your sleep, and by keeping busy, you take your mind off of things.

if i think of any more, i'll let you know. good luck!


and remember--you have my support, if no one else's, but i know that there are more people supporting you than you might think. ^^Thank you I'll keep these in mind. Especially the hot soup and exercise.

Lord Dalek, does it matter if you put some Quik in the warm milk for flavor?

prozzak, I don't drink caffiene for that very reason.

Last night, I didn't really have a nightmare, but I didn't exactly sleep comfortably either. I'm still tired (it's early) and nervous. But it was better than the last two nights.

[Tash]

Thank you I'll keep these in mind. Especially the hot soup and exercise.

Lord Dalek, does it matter if you put some Quik in the warm milk for flavor?

prozzak, I don't drink caffiene for that very reason.

Last night, I didn't really have a nightmare, but I didn't exactly sleep comfortably either. I'm still tired (it's early) and nervous. But it was better than the last two nights.Well, then it's getting better...

but, if you want another suggestion, accomplish something before bed (you must have some sort of hobby). Then you can go to bed with a sence of accomplishment. That should help.

[Leaping Larry Jojo]

You wake up screaming? That's pretty extreme, even for nightmares. Hmm. Your hospital fear is definitely logical, but I wonder if you might have some sort of complex? I don't know, I guess that has been my only experience with screamers. I know some people who react to some things in an extreme manner may have some sort of behavioural complex. It's not a bad thing, just that it's better that you identify it so you can take the proper precautions regularly.

[Avery]

Something that really helped me when I had my nightmare problems a few years back was falling asleep to soothing music turned down very low, and played in a loop all night. I know some people can't do this, the noise disturbs their sleep, but it calmed me down immensely.

I hope this problem goes away soon, FoneBone!

[Czar Gato]

I don't know how relevant this will be, but if at any time you start to get paralysis nightmares ( feeling that you are awake and there is a sinister force in the room, but you can't move or talk), I would suggest closing your eyes and saying a prayer or meditating instead of fighting it; that wakes you up almost immediately.

Like I said, those probably aren't the kind of nightmares you're having (at least based on your description), but a preventive measure that helps with sleep paralysis that might work with what you have is to try changing your sleeping position. I usually get nightmares when I sleep on my back, so now I sleep on my stomach or side and it seems to help.

At any rate, I hope you start to feel better. :)

[Kury Wagner]

Maybe you need to calm your body, also. Try yoga, or pilates! I love pilates! :sweat:

[JohnCrichton]

Rule #1

YOU'RE MAKING THE NIGHTMARE HAPPEN!!!!
When you're having a nightmare... it's you that's making it happen. You dont' fall asleep and go to another world you can't control... you go to another world that you completely control. So, when things go south... try and remind yourself in the dream that you're the one doing it for whatever reason. Whatever fear you may have in you subconscious, you're the one choosing to bring it to the front to kick the crap outta ya.

Turn against the nightmare. If you want to win against whatever's attacking you... you will.

It only took me one time a long time ago to stand up against a dream and beat it to make them never come back again.

Show your mind who's boss. :evil:

[Phantasm]

aaaaaawwwwwww
I feel so bad fone bone! I wish I could be of some help...:(
uumm...try getting yourself exhausted before going to bed. that way you'll fall asleep imeadiately...and won't have time to dwell on things that upset u so hopefully no more nightmares...:sad:

[Fone Bone]

Rule #1

YOU'RE MAKING THE NIGHTMARE HAPPEN!!!!
When you're having a nightmare... it's you that's making it happen. You dont' fall asleep and go to another world you can't control... you go to another world that you completely control. So, when things go south... try and remind yourself in the dream that you're the one doing it for whatever reason. Whatever fear you may have in you subconscious, you're the one choosing to bring it to the front to kick the crap outta ya.

Turn against the nightmare. If you want to win against whatever's attacking you... you will.

It only took me one time a long time ago to stand up against a dream and beat it to make them never come back again.

Show your mind who's boss. :evil:I've tried to control my dreams. Sometimes even if I know I'm dreaming I'm still scared.

I had a nap today and it went all right. There was some bad stuff in my dream but I wasn't locked up. That's the thing that really scares me. It might have helped that I rearranged all my stuffed animals on my bed so that when I sleep now my head is inclined. I think the real test is the next few days. I want my nightmares to be scarce not just only waking up screaming every two or three nights. Of course that would be better than every night.

Thank you Phantasm too.

[Leaping Larry Jojo]

From an outsider, I'm more concerned about the fact that you're screaming even after you wake up. Most cases of nightmares involve sweating and a shock to the system WHILE dreaming, but it's a very extreme case when you're waking up screaming. I don't think preventing the nightmares is necessarily the solution like most people here are suggesting; I think there's a behavioural complex in this. No doubt the CONSTANT nightmares is a major problem, but your reaction to it upon waking up suggests that this is no minor thing you can simply get a quick fix on. At least, I think trying to prevent the nightmares is not necessarily the correct attack--it would only seem to be a temporary solution.

My brief suggestion is to get a close friend who's willing to help you and talk to him or her about this and to accompany you when you're going somewhere you don't like. Work your way up to trying to confront the setting you're afraid of--by this I mean there might come a time where you might have to visit the real-life setting you see in your dreams. In this case, a hospital.

If I have the time I'll look into this further this weekend.

[Fone Bone]

From an outsider, I'm more concerned about the fact that you're screaming even after you wake up. Most cases of nightmares involve sweating and a shock to the system WHILE dreaming, but it's a very extreme case when you're waking up screaming. I don't think preventing the nightmares is necessarily the solution like most people here are suggesting; I think there's a behavioural complex in this. No doubt the CONSTANT nightmares is a major problem, but your reaction to it upon waking up suggests that this is no minor thing you can simply get a quick fix on. At least, I think trying to prevent the nightmares is not necessarily the correct attack--it would only seem to be a temporary solution.

My brief suggestion is to get a close friend who's willing to help you and talk to him or her about this and to accompany you when you're going somewhere you don't like. Work your way up to trying to confront the setting you're afraid of--by this I mean there might come a time where you might have to visit the real-life setting you see in your dreams. In this case, a hospital.

If I have the time I'll look into this further this weekend.I'm not going back to the hospital. I'd rather die than be locked up.

Yes, I do have a complex problem. I suffer from schizo-effective, obessessive compulsive disorder and Asperger's Syndrome. I wouldn't be surprised if I was also suffering post-traumatic shock syndrone although I haven't been diagnosed with it.

The problem is all of my friends live far away. One of my friends is married and has a couple of kids and he is very frazzled right now. Two of my other friends are dealing with illnesses of their own and I don't want to burden them. They also have long distance phone numbers that run up both of our phone bills.

As for my so-called "best" friend? Well, she is always out partying with her manipulative "friends" who treat her like crap and doesn't have time for me. I haven't spoken to her in a couple of weeks and the last time I talked to her she had to get off the phone quick because she was going out. I don't think she cares about me.

I COULD talk to my sister. The problem is I have a hard time getting her on the phone. She's never home.

The only other person I can talk to is my case worker. She is the only worker I trust but unfortunately she only sees me twice a week.

So in short, the people I can talk to are limited.

[Jave]

Is there anyone you think you need to apologize to?

When I'm in a quarrel with someone, I can't sleep for days.

[Fone Bone]

Is there anyone you think you need to apologize to?

When I'm in a quarrel with someone, I can't sleep for days.Already did. Although that was only a minor problem.

Well, I've had a couple of restful nights. I've tried warm milk and guided imagery and it really did the trick. I realize that I have more problems to deal with but since I'm getting a new therapist it should be okay. This is only a temperary fix, but for now, that's what I needed. Thank you all for your support and I should be fine. I'm feeling 100% better.

Thank you again.

Fone Bone a.k.a. Matt Zimmer.