Synopsis: Archer and Lana must pose as a honeymooning newlywed couple to try and capture devious North Koreans who – when they aren’t meeting with former NBA stars – are busy trying to buy enriched uranium in swanky hotels.
Details: The mission is simple – Archer and Lana must pose as a honeymooning newlywed couple in order to entrap the nefarious North Koreans who have taken the time out of their busy schedules crammed full of meetings with former NBA stars like Dennis Rodman, to try and buy some enriched uranium in swanky hotels. Sounds easy enough – lure the North Koreans with a trail of popcorn or Twinkies – whatever works best – put them out of commission, secure the uranium, check out is at 11.
But nothing is easy in the world of ISIS – not even checking into the hotel as Lana and Archer ensue on yet another of their bitchfests – they are the happy couple, after all. This one is intriguing as Archer proposes they play their honeymoon roles to full effect while Lana is more interested in nabbing the North Koreans. Since Archer has the company credit card, he decides to order every single item on the dinner menu – to make the honeymoon ruse look legitimate.
Back at ISIS headquarters, Pam begins to taunt Cyril that not only are Archer and Lana posing as a honeymooning couple but that they are actually “banging” nonstop and proceeds to provide Cyril with a demonstration of how she thinks Archer is banging Lana with the assist of a gyro sandwich as a visual aid.
With Archer busily charging everything he can, including manicures and pedicures, to the company’s credit card, Lana takes it upon herself to begin the work portion of the mission and starts scaling the outside wall of the hotel in an attempt to reach the North Koreans’ room. Archer, annoyed that he has to work – and that Lana wants to work – catches up with her, then the pair engage in another argument over whose ISIS financial bonus is bigger before Lana falls off the building and Archer rescues her with a free fall and sliding suction cup save.
Back at ISIS HQ, Malory has discovered Archer’s overabundant use of the company credit card account and uses Archer’s bonus money to pay for dinner to avoid having her nemesis – the faceless Trudy – pay for it, then promptly names Lana as Agent-in-Command as Archer’s punishment.
Still arguing, Lana and Archer encounter the North Koreans in the elevator and, after a brief skirmish, the North Koreans capture Lana and handcuff Archer and Lana together. Archer quickly escapes from the handcuffs, frees Lana and the pair escape to the bathroom where they lock themselves in. While the North Koreans are preparing to shoot through the door and kill both of them, Cyril arrives yelling “suppressing fire!…extinguisher!” This distracts the North Koreans and creates a smoky atmosphere which Archer and Lana use as cover to flee the bathroom – but not before Archer “mistakenly” pounds Cyril a few times for fouling up his honeymoon with Lana, who cuts down the remaining North Koreans with machine gun fire.
It is revealed that it was Dr. Krieger who was trying to sell the uranium to the North Koreans and his radioactive pig – Piggly 3 – is brought in to eat the North Korean corpses and while Archer’s and Lana’s bonuses are used to pay the hotel bill.
The Poop and Skinny: Top three things to remember from this episode…
Archer has access to the ISIS Black Titanium company credit card.
Lana has been promoted from Archer’s babysitter [in the last episode] to Agent-In-Command in this episode.
Cheryl thinks mousse is moose or possibly elk.
Contrary to popular opinion, Pam was not born in a barn – but has formerly admitted to having slept in one on many occasions.
Krieger was more than likely having sexual intercourse with Piggly 3.
The coveted TZ Best Line of the Episode Award goes to Archer, who assesses the North Korean threat thusly – “North Korea – the nation-state equivalent of the short bus.”