NTSF:SD:SUV:: Episode Recap - The Return of Dragon Shumway - Season 2, Episode 9
Synopsis: Piper’s getting married – yay! [insert crazy loud girlie screams here]. But wait a minute… wasn’t she already married down in Mexico to that former ninja girl school instructor after she had too many shots of tequila and lopped Francisco Pablo’s head off at the reception? Oh yeah. Forgot about that. Tequila will do that.
Details: After a touching proposal involving a ring submerged in a plastic container of bleu cheese dressing at a sports bar, Piper is all set to get married to the executive producer of “NTSF:SD:SUV” …oh, we mean the guy who is playing the character but who also happens to be the executive producer of the show, when she suddenly doesn’t remember that she has been previously married to her former ninja girl school instructor, the fearfully-named Dragon Shumway. Dragon is not about to allow this marriage to go on – oh, he will have objections – and Kove knows it because she’s been married 11 times [including one time to Trent when he was drunk on wine coolers] and knows how these things work. So Kove and the rest of the NTSF crew infiltrate – well, actually, they were invited, but don’t tell the caterer – Piper’s wedding to ward off unwanted advances from Dragon and sure enough, Shumway shows up where you least expect it – if you’re not paying attention – at the wedding, where he proceeds to kill the priest [Rob Riggle] and the caterer before maid of honor Jessie comes to the rescue at the end with some swordplay of her own, declaring that “it’s my wedding now, bitches!” Weddings are so predictable.
The Poop and Skinny: A wedding always has plenty of ammunition for comedy material and this episode was no different as there were no less than six memorable lines or scenes to try and remember and recall for your friends at this weekend’s parties.
Scene One – Kove’s been married 11 times so she knows what’s needed for a good bachelorette party and its radioactively glowing Appletini mix she heisted from the lab for use only on the gay Mafia.
Scene Two – Kove declares, “Weddings are so beautiful.” Trent replies, “Not on my watch.”
Scene Three – Piper blurts out that the reason she left Dragon Shumway was due to the fact that he killed her entire family to collect the insurance money then bought her a yacht for Valentine’s Day.
Scene Four – Tucker recites the groom’s deep vows for his new bride, Piper – “You know what’s up. It’s all good. It’s awesome.”
Scene Five – Tucker sprints away from Dragon Shumway shouting – “Look out! He’s got a pony tail!”
Scene Six – Piper revisits the family killing spree with Dragon. Piper: “You killed my family!” Dragon: “They were already pretty old.”
Finally, it is worth noting that this week’s episode was brought to you by Childrens Hospital.