Synopsis: The title is a dead giveaway to the appearance of Michael Gross [who played the father on “Family Ties”] as Trent’s father who has been held in the Nick Cannon Underwater Ultramax prison for the last six years and must be killed to prevent the remake of “Family Ties” on cable or network [not really, but it’s better than the actual reason]. Guess who gets the job?
Details: Trent must fake-assassinate the “President of the Navy” [played by a blustery Rob Riggle] in order to get into the Nick Cannon Underwater Ultramax prison [which, as we are to understand it, has a work-study program with Nick Cannon High School] where his father [played by “Family Ties” father, Michael Gross] has been held for six years after blowing up nursing homes and orphanages. The President of the Navy, meanwhile, is put in a safe house, which is really a room in a four-star hotel and the President objects vociferously and seemingly endlessly about the lack of five-star amenities and an open window he can masturbate in front of. Kove supplies Trent with enough poison “to kill 50 kittens” and instructs him to use it on his father only to find out his wily old man is on to his scheme and they have a poison-off battle that Trent thinks he wins but which his Dad really wins in the end – because Dads are always right and they always win.
The Poop and Skinny: Once again, a good idea goes as flat as 7-Up after the wedding reception. Having Michael Gross as Trent’s dad – and divulging that the real family surname is Jingles, not Hauser – was good, but left openings you could drive a turnip truck through for cameo appearances by Justine Bateman [Mallory on “Family Ties”] and Tina Yothers [Jennifer] – both of whom would seemingly still be interested since Bateman is still acting and Yothers would have nothing better to do since her band is not exactly tearing it up on the charts. We can understand not having Meredith Baxter and Michael Keaton – though there are still comedic opportunities there [it is NTSF, after all], especially with Baxter who pumped out five kids in three marriages and then decided she was a lesbian. Oh well, at least we now know that marbles can be a weapon – so that’s something.